Attention: Heads up, loooonngg chapter :D
The sun woke me, peaking his nosy face into Bennu’s room and I tousled a little before my eyes slowly opened. I looked to the spot next to me and noticed it was empty, then looking around the room to take in my foreign surroundings. I took a deep breath in and never wanted to get up, basking in the scent within the room and my insides fluttered at the familiar smell of the woman I loved. The smell eventually became too familiar to my senses for me to distinguish between anything else, finally convincing myself that it was time to get up. I sat up and swung my feet off the bed, sitting on the edge for a moment and I stopped, listening carefully and I could hear the faint sound of Bahiti on the other side of the wall, assuming she was playing with her toys and a wide smile formed on my lips; I couldn’t wait to meet her and see what she was like. After a few seconds of listening to her, I stood up from the bed and walked around Bennu’s room, picking up all of my clothes off the floor, though I had failed to find my orange sweater. Hmm..
I gave up on looking for it, going to the door and stepping out into the hallway where I could hear Bahiti a little clearer with her door shut and I smiled once more. I looked left and saw Bennu in the kitchen, coming out of her room and walking towards her and she glanced at me with a flirtatious grin.
“How did you sleep?” She wondered, continuing to prepare whatever she was making, and I guessed waffles by the ingredients I saw.
“Haven’t had that good of sleep in years,” I replied, watching as she didn’t look at me but smiled more to my answer.
“Well, good.. Would you like to stay for breakfast?” She asked, glancing over at me once again and I nodded.
“Yeah, I’d love to,” I answered, reaching the outside of the kitchen and continuing to watch her prepare the meal.
“How did you sleep?” I asked in return.
“Wonderfully,” she replied, seeing how nostalgic and relaxed she looked as she continued to prepare the meal.
“How’s Bahiti? Is she going to be eating with us?” I wondered, a little spark of excitement tousling my stomach.
“She is very well, and no, she won’t be joining us. She already ate. She gets to play for a little while longer and then its bath time and a nap after that, whether she likes it or not,” she answered, letting out a hummed chuckle and I smiled; I’ll have to remember that if I’m going to be around here more often.
After she had put all that she had prepared into the oven, I slipped my way into the kitchen and wrapped my arm around her neck, pulling her closer and kissing her cheek and making my way up to her ear. Bennu let out ticklish giggles and it only compelled me to continue, nibbling on her earlobe, “Jazon, stop it,” she said in between her laughter.
“You wearing anything under this?” I whispered softly, running my left hand over her waist and slipping it under the closed flap of the robe she wore, soon feeling skin under the soft material.
“Stop ittt, you can’t distract me in the mornings, I have too much to do,” she teased, turning her head to look up at me and I sighed but smiled.
“Fiiiine,” I replied, seeing her lift her head and she kissed me briefly before going to the oven and checking on the food.
After eating breakfast together, I gathered up the plates and utensils, “Oh, Jazon.. You don’t have to do that, really,” Bennu tried to stop me but I walked towards the kitchen anyways.
“It’s not a problem, I gotta thank you for the meal somehow since you won’t let me into that robe with you,” I replied with a grin and she smiled appreciatively. As I washed the dishes for her, all I could think about was Bahiti. Was she going to like me? What if she doesn’t want anything to do with me? I missed out on a lot of things with her already, but I knew that I didn’t want to miss out on anything else. “Has she ever asked about me? Well.. I mean, about who her father is or anything?” I asked as I cleaned one of the plates.
“Yes.. Recently I had gone over to a friends house who has a a kid of her own, too, and Bahiti wondered who the man was her friend was calling ‘Dad’. She started asking if she had one, too,” she replied.
“And what did you say?”
“I said she did, he just wasn’t with us at the moment. I promised her I’d let her meet him one day. I told her this morning that you were here and she was going to meet you; she seemed excited. But, Bahiti is a very shy girl, it takes her a little to warm up to people, don’t be discouraged if she doesn’t run into your arms right away,” Bennu added, smiling warmly and I nodded, finishing up the dishes.
Bennu came into the kitchen and I watched as she wrapped up the rest of the waffles we didn’t eat and saved them for leftovers, “Do you think she’ll ever warm up to me?” I asked.
“Of course.. With time, she’ll grow to love you, don’t worry. She’ll eventually start to ask for things and ask you to play with her, that’s when you know she likes you,” Bennu comforted and I smiled, watching her step up to me and she put her arms around me, pushing herself up to kiss me, “I know realizing you have a child might be a little overwhelming, but I know you’ll be a great father,” she added, calming my nerves more. “Ready?” She wondered.
“Yeah, I think so,” I replied, Bennu then talking my hand as she led me towards Bahiti’s room.
Bennu walked in first while I stayed out of view for a moment and listening to them converse. A tiny, soft voice spoke before Bennu, “Mommy, I made their bedroom different colors! I put stripes on the walls with my crayons! Come see!” Bahiti said excitedly and I smiled to myself, hearing her dainty voice for the first time filled me with such joy.
“It’s beautiful, my amisi, I’m sure they love it,” Bennu replied, “Do you remember what we talked about this morning, about you meeting Daddy?” Bennu asked and I peaked into the room without Bahiti noticing. I saw her nod to Bennu and she continued, “Well, he’s outside the room, do you still want to say hi?” Bennu asked next, but Bahiti didn’t say or do anything, “Don’t be such a shy girl, he wants to meet you, too,” Bennu continued, running her fingers through Bahiti’s bangs and brushing the strands out of her face.
Bennu stood up straight again and came to the door, looking to me and smiling as she took my hand and led me into Bahiti’s room. The moment I was within her sight, I watched as her bright eyes widened when she looked up at me; I could tell she wasn’t ready for someone so much taller than her mother to step in and for a moment I thought she was scared of me. Our sapphire eyes stayed connected for a few moments and I soon stepped in slowly a little more, stopping in front of her and bending down closer to her level. I smiled warmly, wanting to do what Bennu had done and touch her hair or even hold her, but I didn’t want to rush things, “Hi, Bahiti, I’m glad I finally get to meet you.. You’re very beautiful, did you know that?” I asked, watching as she averted her eyes from mine briefly and I couldn’t tell if she was just being shy or if she liked the compliment. I noticed that her eyes had found something else to stare at, looking at my arms and I smirked, “I’m pretty colorful, aren’t I?” I asked with a gentle chuckle, “Do you wanna see?” I asked, holding out my arm a little more and she looked at the designs with curiosity, yet she was still a little weary to get closer for a better look.
I don’t know what I did, if I even did anything, but Bahiti suddenly ran around me and over to Bennu and I stood turning around and my expression went discouraged as I watched her tug on Bennu’s robe. I thought it was going well even for how little we talked, she seemed very interested in me, but what did I do to scare her away? She began to whine a little when Bennu wouldn’t pick her up.
Bennu looked down at her and sighed, “What’s wrong with you, huh?” She wondered, picking up Bahiti and she hugged Bennu close, “Don’t be such a scaredy-cat,” she said softly, “He only wants to get to know you, you want to know him, too, don’t you?” She asked and Bahiti didn’t answer, hiding her face in Bennu’s shoulder. Bennu looked to me and smirked, her expression trying to reassure me that I didn’t do anything for her to be feeling this way, yet I still didn’t like seeing her get away from me. But, no matter how long it takes, I was going to get her to open up to me eventually.
I stepped up to Bennu and Bahiti and smiled down at her before beginning, looking back up to Bennu, “It’s okay.. I should get going anyways,” I said softly, looking down at Bahiti again, “It was great meeting you, beautiful, I’m sure I’ll see you again very soon,” I said with another smile. I looked back up to Bennu, “Wanna walk me out?” I asked, seeing her smile and nod and she walked back over to Bahiti’s dollhouse, putting her down onto the floor again.
“I’ll be right back and then you’re getting a bath.. Can you say bye to him?” Bennu wondered and I stopped from leaving the room, looking back at her. Although she still didn’t use words, she lifted her hand and danced her fingers hesitantly, waving at me for a few seconds and I smiled wide. I waved back at her and watched as Bennu kissed the top of her head and stood straight, walking over towards me and we walked out of her room to go into the living room.
When we got into the living room, I faced Bennu and smiled, “Well, I can see it’s going to take her a little while to get used to me, but I’d love to come back soon, anytime actually.”
“Well, what are you doing tonight? I could make us dinner,” Bennu suggested and I kept my smile.
“Yeah, I can figure something out for work.. What time?”
“Hmm.. How about I have it ready around 8:00? Bahiti goes to bed around then, but you’re welcome to stop by earlier and spend time with her if you want,” she continued.
“Yeah, I’ll definitely be here earlier than eight,” I reply with a grin, watching her smile and I reached my hand up to run it down her arm.
Bennu slowly wrapped her arms around me and pulled me to her, connecting our lips and my hands wrapped around her as well, pulling her against me even more and deepening the kiss. I didn’t want to leave, I wanted to stay all day and spend all of my time with them, but I needed to get home despite knowing I’d have to face Faline eventually. The quiet moans she hummed during our kiss only compelled me to forget about going home, wanting to disrobe her this instant and repeat everything we did last night. But, somehow I was finally able to pull from her lips and she looked at me with a gentle panting breath, her eyes telling me to stay, “I’ll see you tonight,” I said quietly, watching her nod and smile, slowly letting me go and I backed up towards the door, turning around when I reached it and walking out to go home.
On my drive home, I started thinking of Faline and what I would say to her; she’ll probably be wondering where I was last night and why I never came home. I wondered what she would have to say to me now after having some time to think without me around. I thought about Bennu as well, unable to stand I was lying to her and I was debating on telling her about the family I had, even knowing the risk of making her upset. I couldn’t hide this from her, it would eventually turn into a huge problem and the sooner I told her, the better were my chances of keeping her. I was growing nervous as I got closer to home, but I knew Faline was at work by now and she probably dropped the twins off at Anya’s place; that’s what she usually did if I was ever unable to watch them. Anya had been helping out a lot ever since the twins were born; she fell in love with them and adores babysitting whenever she can. Her and Dwight broke up, but she found someone else at the hospital to date. A patient, actually, that had been rushed into the ER and she was his doctor during his recovery. I was happy for her and thankful that she had found someone that didn’t care if they had kids or not, he loved her and I could tell, that’s all that mattered.
I parked the car and didn’t see Faline’s car there and the toddler seats were gone; good, she did take the boys, and Lucy was at school. I walked into the house without a care, glad that I could take a shower and have some time to myself in the house rather than just sleeping through the day. I went to sleep at a good time last night rather than around 4 or 5:00 in the morning, so I was less tired than I’d normally be during this time of the day. I walked through the foyer and up the stairs, walking towards my room to use the bathroom and clean myself up a bit.
I showered for a long time, getting out after about 45 minutes of only reminding myself of last night over and over and I couldn’t wait to do it again. I found it so odd that this whole time I was never able to understand why I didn’t like Faline as much as I should, and that was because I loved someone else that I never had realized before until now. I walked up to the mirror and wiped my hand over it, clearing it from fog and checking myself out. I grabbed my toothbrush and filled it with toothpaste, brushing my teeth and mouth clean of everything I could still taste from being with Bennu.
After finishing up in the bathroom, I came out into my room and put a new set of clothes on, shutting the drawer to the dresser and taking a deep breath as I stood there, trying to calm my building nerves from thinking about what I needed to say to Bennu later. I was nervous, really nervous.. I knew she was going to be angry, but just how angry? I had always spent time with Bennu back at college, but we’ve never fought before, there was no need to, it was only normal, flirtatious yet loving conversations; there was obviously something there that she never cared to acknowledge like I wanted to every time I saw her. At this point, she seemed to finally succumb to her feelings for me once she had left the club like I’ve asked her to so many times, I guess a child needed to be her realization; though I wished she had realized it way, way sooner.
I knew it was early, it was almost 10:00 am but I went downstairs and grabbed a beer from the fridge; I wasn’t planning on drinking a lot, I only wanted one for now to help calm my nerves. My thoughts were beginning to give me a headache as my worry continued to grow, fearing that once I finally tell Bennu everything that was already going on, she would disappear from my life again and I couldn’t have that; especially not after knowing we have a beautiful baby girl together. This is everything that I’ve wanted with her, to be with her and have a family; but, it was so much more complicated than that now.
After my beer, I threw it out and pulled out my phone, calling Miss Chu to check up on how the rest of last night went without me at the bar.
“Hello..?” She answered after about five rings.
“Hey, it’s me.. How was work after I left? Did everything go okay?” I asked and I heard her yawn on the other end.
“Jason.. It’s only a little passed 10:00, you woke me upppp,” she whined and I sighed.
“I’m sorry, but I left you in charge, I need to know that everything went okay,” I said sternly.
“Yes, everything went fine.. Let now me go back to bed.”
“I need a favor,” I continued quickly, keeping her from hanging up and there was a silence over the phone.
“What do you need?” She wondered, catching her attention.
“I need to take another night off, I need you to be in charge again,” I demanded.
“Jason, I can’t do your work, you know that.”
“I know, I’ll do it.. I’m not asking you to go in my office and do my work, I just need you to open, watch the place and close.. I might even come by before 10:00 pm,” I said with hesitation, planning ahead on Bennu kicking me out after I confess everything, “But just in case I don’t I need to know that you’re capable of watching the place,” I continued, hearing her sigh lightly over the other line.
“Fine, but you owe me,” she teased and I scoffed.
“I don’t owe you shit, I’m your boss, do as I ask or you’re gone,” I retorted, hanging up after my words and putting the phone back into my pocket.
I went back upstairs and into my room, not bothering to turn on the lights since the sun was still doing a great job of lighting every room I was in. I collapsed onto the bed, shutting my eyes and trying to relax and I tried to think of something better involving Bennu and how she might react to the news I was going to tell her. She was so beautiful, we had made such a gorgeous little girl and I couldn’t deny the fact that I also wanted to tell her that I loved her, but how would I do that? If I told her before my confession, she might think of it as a lie in the end, but if I told her afterward, she would think I was being desperate again, trying to keep her in my life like I constantly did back at the club when she worked there. But, what if she felt the same? If I was able to explain myself correctly, she might have more sympathy than anger, at least I hoped she would.
I heard rustling and my eyes opened, lifting my head and the sun was less in the windows than it was two seconds ago; did I fall asleep? I checked my watch and it read 3:30 pm, I fell asleep for about 5 hours and had no idea I was going to. I looked towards the dresser where I heard the noise and saw Faline, changing out of her work clothes and into something more comfortable for around the house like she did after she got off work; yet, it was too early for her to be home still.. “You’re home early,” I voiced softly, seeing her expression change slightly, but she didn’t look at me, watching her throw on a shirt.
“And you’re home late,” she replied blankly; I knew this was coming.
“Where are the boys? And Lucy?” I wondered, sitting up on the bed and rubbing my face, trying to wake myself up more.
“Still at Anya’s.. Lucy went over to Cara’s to do her homework.. I thought it might give us a chance to talk if I got off early, and if you were here,” she replied.
“Faline..” I began, standing to my feet and facing her, “I.. I’m sorry for the things I said, but-”
“Where were you all night?” She asked, cutting me off and my heartbeat increased slightly.
“At work.. I slept there.. I’m sorry,” I answered, taking a few steps closer to her.
Faline faced me as she continued, “Don’t be sorry.. I’m the one who should be,” she finished.
I took a deep breath in and stepped closer, looking down at her as she stood there, seemingly ashamed of herself, “No, I was out of line.. I should be paying more attention to you, to the boys.. I get so caught up with work I forget what’s important,” I reply, walking up to her and lifting my hand, caressing her cheek, “Let me make it up to you.. Anything you want,” I retorted, seeing her look up to me and I noticed the quick glance at her looking to my lips. If I was going to keep the boys close to me without the threat of her leaving with them, I needed to do this. I could tell she was dying for me, I’ve seen this angst in her before and it was only after we wouldn’t be intimate for a long time; I understood her pent up energy and there was only one way to help her release it.
Honestly, I didn’t feel right with what I was about to do. Faline was in need and so was I, for her for feel release and for me to feel safe that she wouldn’t leave me and take the boys for what I’ve done. I slid my hand around her and lifted her chin with the other, taking a deep look into her eyes and regret consumed me as I thought of Bennu once more, knowing this wasn’t what I wanted, yet I knew I needed to take action to keep Faline happy and close. I leaned forward and kept my lips centimeters from hers, still unable to kiss her as I thought of something else, “Take off your clothes,” I demanded softly, watching as her eyes looked to mine and I knew her heart skipped a beat as I planted a few gentle pecks under her bottom lip along her chin.
As I kissed her jawline and brushed her hair away from her neck to continue my way down, I felt her reach to the bottom of her shirt and she began pulling it over her head, separating my lips from her skin briefly as she removed it and I reached behind her to remove her bra. She slipped it off after the shirt and I continued my lips down, going over her clavicle and she pushed her chest against me in excitement and I knew she was on the brink of begging me for it. As I kissed her upper chest, I ran my fingers under the rim of her panties and pulled them down slowly, letting them fall to the floor and I gripped the back of her thighs, hoisting her up and she wrapped her legs around me as I brought her towards the window.
I knelt down and gripped her thighs harder, managing to put them over my arms and her legs rested over my shoulders, her thighs hugging my cheeks and I pushed her bottom up gently, running my tongue below her belly button and eventually finding the warmth of her sex and my tongue began it’s torture. Her moans started instantly and within minutes I could feel her legs shaking against my shoulders, glancing up at her and seeing her eyes shut and mouth open in ecstasy and I continued even more. Her thighs eventually started to grip a little harder around my neck and I knew she was getting closer to the brink, only compelling me to continue harder and she whispered for me to stop repetitively at her own regret of not being able to hold out longer, but I didn’t quit. After a few more minutes, she let out moans I had never heard before that drove me mad, Faline quickly succumbing to my touch and she eventually let out gentle hums of relief. I slowly came to a stop and began kissing her lower stomach once more as she calmed and collected herself, her thighs still quaking against my shoulders and face.
After giving her what she so desperately wanted, wiping my mouth and watching her get dressed yet again, she glanced over at me with a small grin and I smirked, “What is it?” I asked.
“Nothing,” she said softly, and although I wanted to question it more, I realized why she was happy; it was because she was convinced I still felt for her.. Good, that’s exactly the reassurance that I needed from her. I stepped closer to her as she pulled up and fastened a pair of pants she had pulled from the dresser, hugging her from behind and she laid her head against the front of my shoulder. “Did you shower already? You have work in a few hours,” she wondered as I kissed her cheek gently and let her go.
I walked towards the bed again, “I already took a shower, I was just relaxing while I was here,” I hesitated, “I’m sorry I didn’t come back, but I figured you needed your space and time to think.. So I stayed away,” I said softly, laying back down on the bed.
I heard her over by the dresser as I looked out the window, “It’s all right.. I’m sorry for.. Well, being mean and accusing you of things just because I haven’t had you in a while.. I admit I was just getting pent up.. I know you work hard and you rarely see us, but I know why you do it..” She replied and I smirked as I lie there.
“Don’t worry, I understand,” I replied, shutting my eyes as I continued to hear her within the room.
“Well, I’m going to get the boys from Anya’s place, will you be here when I get back?” She asked.
“Yeah, I’ll be here,” I replied, hearing her then exit the room.
After about 20 minutes, Faline returned with the boys and I went downstairs to see them, seeing Faline holding them both and I picked up my pace a little to help her. “There’s my boys!” I said warmly.
“Daddy!” They both said simultaneously, causing me to chuckle and I kissed Gibson on the forehead and took Gareth into my arms.
I tossed Gareth into the air and he giggled and flailed gently within my grasp, “How was seeing Auntie Anya and Simon?” I asked.
“It was fun!” Gareth replied, “We watched Harry Potter with Simon and Auntie Anya made cupcakes and she let us eat the batter before she made them!” He replied excitedly and I chuckled again now that I realized his sugar rush. Anya always spoiled them rotten, they’ve never once came back from her place and said they had anything less of a great time.
“Well good, I’m glad. Daddy’s gotta get ready and go to work soon, let’s go upstairs for a little bit and play before I need to leave,” I suggested, bringing Gareth upstairs and Faline followed with Gibson.
I played with the boys for a little while and soon put them in their playpen, needing to leave and get ready to go to Bennu’s and I wanted to be there around 7:00 like I normally would be leaving to go to work. I went over to Faline who was reading in the rocking chair and she looked up to my briefly and smiled, “Work?” She assumed, looking back down to her book.
“Yeah, I’ll uhh.. See you when I see you I guess,” I said with a faint chuckle and I watched her nod, turning around then and walking towards the door. I looked over towards the boys as I left, “Be good, I’ll see you guys tomorrow,” I said softly, watching them wave goodbye and I left the room to get ready.
I pulled out a new suit I bought a few days ago; Faline wanted me to look more professional and this outfit said it all, I even got new dress shoes. I fastened my tie that also happened to be a gift from Lucy and adjusted the suit, buttoning one of the two buttons, then running my hands over my hair to straighten out any kinks I may have missed. I left the house and got into my car, taking the bridge into the city and the sight of the lights made me more excited and also extremely nervous to see Bennu. I remember whenever I ran away when I was little I would come to the city for peace; I loved the lights and the nightlife, the statues and strange personalities walking around town. But, everything was in the city; the place where my house burned down and I lost my parents, the cemetery, the death of Lana, my sisters, my work, and now Bennu. So many things tied me to this city, and although the bad outweighed the good, I still went to the city every day regardless for so many different reasons.
I got to Bennu’s and went upstairs, knocking on her door and she greeted me almost instantly, shutting the door and going to her, “My God, you look beautiful,” was the first thing I said, reaching up and caressing the back of my hand down her cheek.
She smiled bashfully, bringing her hand up to lay over mine and she then stepped closer, putting her hands to either side of my face, “You look very handsome, I’m a very lucky woman,” she replied and I leaned in quickly to kiss her lips.
“Where’s Bahiti?” I wondered, feeling her arms then wrap around my neck in a relaxed manner.
“In her room, go say hi to her, she hasn’t stopped talking about you all day,” Bennu answered happily and I was overjoyed at the fact that she had already taken a liking to me despite what happened earlier this morning.
“Go, I told her you were coming and I’m sure she’s been anxiously waiting,” Bennu continued with a smile and I pecked her on the lips once more, “I’ll start dinner.”
“Okay,” I replied warmly, watching Bennu go towards the kitchen and get out the ingredients, “What are you making?” I wondered, not recognizing anything that I’ve ever seen and she smiled.
“It’s recipes from my homeland and it’s a surprise,” she said teasingly and I chuckled, turning around and making my way towards Bahiti’s room.
I slowly opened the door to Bahiti’s room and saw her on the ground playing with one of her toys. She looked up at me and smiled, then continued to play, “Hi, Bahiti,” I began.
“Hi,” she said quietly, jumping the toy around and making it walk along the ground.
I smiled warmly at her response, “That’s a cute toy you have there.”
“Yeah, he’s my favorite,” she replied quietly again.
“Does it have a name?” I wondered, stepping a few feet closer and she held it up, looking at it questionably.
“A name?” She asked.
“Yeah, you always need to name your favorite toy. What name do you think he’d have? ..Harry?” I joked, hearing her giggle softly and she continued to look at her doll. I remembered back to when Lucy was a toddler and I was on college summer break; I had bought her a bear and she thought of naming it all by herself, every new toy I got her was her favorite.. I still remembered that she named it May and Bahiti reminded me so much of Lucy.
“Um.. I’ll.. I’ll name him Azizi,” she answered.
“Oh, that’s a wonderful name.. How’d you think of that?” I asked, acting over-exaggerated and excited to make her happy.
“It means pre-precious,” she replied, struggling slightly to say the word and my heart melted at how precious she was; I was in love already.
“That’s a great name! Do you know what amisi means? Your Mommy called you that earlier when I was here, ” I wondered, remembering her call Bahiti that and she continued to play with Azizi.
“It means flower. I-It’s my middle name, too,” she said with a smile, looking up at me briefly and I held my smirk; she was so smart for her age, Bennu has taught her so well and she was already growing up to be an amazing little girl.
“D-Do.. You wanna play?” She asked with her gentle tone and I nodded without question.
“Yes, of course.. What do you wanna do?” I asked.
“Do you know, um.. Hide and go seek?” She wondered, standing to her feet and I nodded happily.
“Yeah, I love that game.. What do you want me to count to?”
“Um.. Count to 10.. B-But slowly,” she replied excitedly and I couldn’t even describe the happiness I felt with her.
“Alright, I’ll go over here.. I’m warning you though, I’m pretty good at this game,” I answered and she giggled.
I walked towards an empty corner and stared at the cream colored wall, “One… Two… Three…” I began counting, hearing her scramble around behind me and her running footsteps were a dead giveaway on where she would be without her knowing. As I continued counting slowly like she had asked, still trying to calm my anxious nerves and I hoped playing with Bahiti took forever; I didn’t want to put Bahiti to bed, eat dinner and get to the must needed confession to Bennu.. I was nervous beyond belief. I heard the toy box lid open and I heard her jump inside and shut it somewhat quietly, already knowing where she was. “Eight… Nine… Ten, ready or not, here I come,” I said softly.
I turned around and didn’t look at the toy box, seeing it cracked open a little in my peripherals and knowing for sure now that she was in there. Yet, I walked around the room, dumbfounded and confused, “W-Where did she go? The door didn’t open, yet she’s nowhere in sight! Where did she go??” I exaggerated again playfully. I walked towards the window and checked behind her dollhouse, out the window for kicks, along the side of her crib, but nothing. I turned around again, walking slowly towards the computer table, checking under it and around it. “Wow, she’s really good at this game.. I can’t find her at all!” I continued, standing up straight and hearing a soft giggle come from within the toy box behind me.
“Well…” I continued, “There’s only one other place she could be!” I turned around and walked towards the toy box, seeing the lid close and my smile grew wider. I put my fingers to the lid and lifted it, seeing her inside and she laughed. “There she is!” I said happily, grabbing her up and tossing her in the air as she continued to giggle uncontrollably. I loved every second of this, I loved that so soon after meeting her she was so willing to let me play with her and she even let me hold her within the short time of knowing her. I pulled her close then and kissed the top of her head, seeing her look up at me with the same eyes as myself made my insides only melt more at how adorable this little girl was. Lucy will always be my daughter, always.. Yet, Bahiti was my actual first daughter, one that’s completely mine and better yet, with the woman I adored most in this world.
“I get to look for you now!” She said excitedly and I was happy that this was continuing.
“Alright, but I need to go through the whole place! This room is too small for me to hide!” I requested and she thought for a moment.
“Okay, but no Mommy’s room, I can’t get in!”
“Okay, not Mommy’s room.. But here, the living room and kitchen!” I replied and she nodded.
“Yeah!” She confirmed and I set her down.
“Now go in the corner and count to ten, slowly,” I repeated her words back to her and she agreed, running over to the corner and covering her eyes as she began to count.
As she counted, I went to the door and opened it quickly but slowly, trying to stay quiet and I quickly walked down the hallway and into the living room. Bennu looked to me with a questionable expression as she continued to cook and I put my index finger over my lips, telling her to stay hushed and she smiled warmly, nodding and continuing what she was doing. I went into the living room and hid behind a chair, hearing Bahiti’s voice faintly still in her room and she had finally reached ten.
I heard her quickened footsteps coming down the hall and she went straight to Bennu, searching the kitchen for me and I listened as she questioned her, “Did you see him? Did he come out here?” She wondered and I held back a quiet laugh.
“No, who are you talking about? I have seen no one, Bahiti,” Bennu replied and I smiled, keeping my location a secret and I then heard Bahiti’s footsteps beginning to search the living room area. I saw her then walk into the dining room, looking around the chairs and under the table.
But, before I could move, she looked over to where I was behind the chair and smiled, “Found you, found you!” She called out triumphantly and quickly walked towards me.
I stood up and acted shocked, “Wow, you’re way better at this game than I am!” I replied, reaching down and picking her up and tickling her as she laughed more.
We played for a while longer, but Bennu eventually put a stop to it when she came into Bahiti’s room where we had wound up again playing. We looked to her and she smiled, “Bedtime, little one,” she cooed sweetly and I looked to Bahiti who pouted and looked to me as if to say she could stay up longer.
“Okay, you heard Mommy, time for bed,” I agreed, standing to my feet and Bennu came over towards us and picked up Bahiti.
“You’ll see him again, don’t worry,” Bennu said warmly, combing Bahiti’s hair softly with a gentle smile, “Say goodnight to Daddy,” she continued, looking at me and I smiled back at her in return.
“Night,” Bahiti said somewhat sadly.
“Goodnight, beautiful,” I replied, seeing her smirk softly and I exited the room so Bennu could put her to bed.
As I walked into the living room, the entire room smelled wonderful and I couldn’t wait to try whatever she had made. I noticed the hot meal laid out on the table and I smirked, walking around the living room then and waiting for Bennu.
Within about 5 short minutes, Bahiti’s door closed and I looked down the hall, seeing Bennu walking towards me and my eyes trailed down her body and back up before she reached me. She threw her arms around me and pulled me into her lips, surprising me slightly but I barely hesitated as I kissed her passionately in return.
Bennu soon released me from the kiss and I smirked slightly, feeling her let me go slowly, “I was thinking about you all day, too,” she said quietly and I noticed the gentle lust in her eyes as she looked to me. But, before I could say anything, she pulled away and walked towards the dining table and I checked her out as she walked away from me. “I made some traditional Egyptian dishes, Falafel and Shawarma, I hope you like them. And then just Key Lime pie for something sweet,” she continued and put her hands along the back of one of the dining chairs, looking at me with her same sweet smile. I smirked and made my way towards the dining table, taking the seat at the end opposite of hers and she served us both equal portions before beginning.
We ate dinner together and I had to admit, with something so foreign in front of me, it tasted amazing and I enjoyed every bit of it, “Bennu, this is phenomenal, thank you,” I said during the meal, seeing her look over at me and smile warmly.
“I’m very happy you like it. I adore frog legs, but I thought this might be more appetizing,” she replied.
I raised my brow and grinned, “I’ve had frog legs, actually.. They’re very good, maybe I’ll make them for you sometime,” I answered, watching as she looked back to the meal in front of her instead of at me, loving whenever I noticed she was smitten by something I had said.
After dinner, I washed the dishes for her once more and she put away all of the leftovers like we had done in the morning. I finished the dishes and dried my hands, turning around and seeing Bennu already looking at me with a sweet smile and my heart skipped a beat, “What is it?” I wondered.
“You’re amazing with her, it almost seems like you’ve done this a thousand times before.. She’s never warmed up to someone so quickly, but it makes me very happy,” she replied.
I stepped up closer to her, running my hands down her soft arms and resting my forehead against hers, “Maybe she’s been waiting for this, so she’s happy that it’s finally happened.. I know I am,” I answered, seeing her look to my lips and she pushed herself up and kissed me suddenly.
Our kiss only grew deeper and I wrapped my arms around her, pulling her closer and already regretting needing to stop her. If this continued, I’d never get to say what I came here to.. I reluctantly pulled from her lips and she looked at me with desperation, “What’s wrong?” She asked, searching my expression for an explanation.
I looked down at her and gazed into her eyes, unable to speak at the moment and I eventually calmed myself and took her hand within mine, “Come to the couch with me,” I requested and she nodded, taking my lead and we sat together in a short silence.
“Jazon, talk to me,” she said softly, able to tell in my eyes that something was wrong and I took a deep breath in, exhaling it slowly and looking towards the ground.
“I haven’t been honest with you, but, that’s why I’m here,” I began and I looked up to her briefly, seeing her expression turned slightly worried and I looked back down to the floor. “I know this is.. Going to be hard, but.. I want you to know now that I love Bahiti more than anything, even in the short time I’ve been with her.. I love her,” I looked to Bennu who continued the same expression, “I-I love you more than anything, too.. I have ever since our first night together,” I continued, my eyes going to the floor once again. “But, I should’ve told you sooner, yesterday when you came to my office.. I.. I-I have a.. I have 3 children already, Bennu.. A little girl who’s 8 and twin boys who are 4. My girlfriend and I aren’t on the best terms, but-” I stopped, seeing her stand from the couch suddenly and I looked up, worry written all over me.
“You.. You’re with someone? Right now?” She asked and I averted my eyes from her, “And you have.. You have children with her,” she continued and I hung my head even lower.
“Bennu, it’s not what you think, honestly.. I was so caught up in seeing you after so long, it all escaped my mind the moment I saw you! I’m sorry for not telling you, but I couldn’t.. It all happened so fast and then finding out about Bahiti!? I couldn’t tell you.. But, it’s been only 24 hours, but dammit! I’m saying it now! I didn’t want to keep this a secret from you, so I’m telling you now before it gets any worse!” I watched as she walked away from me a few steps, keeping silent so I continued, “Bennu, I don’t love her.. I love You.. I’m only with her so she doesn’t take my boys away from me.. If she knew I was seeing you or if she ever found out about Bahiti, I’d never see my sons again,” I finished.
“Last night..” She began to reply quietly, “Last night you could’ve said something.. And you could’ve said something this morning when I said I knew you were going to be a good father.. You should’ve told me then, seeing as you already are a father!”
“I know, I know.. But Bennu, please.. You have to know that I’ve cared for you every single time we were together. You treated me differently than the rest and I did the same to you. It’s been a long time.. I’m not trying to sound rude, but me keeping this secret for 24 hours is better than you keeping Bahiti from me for 4 years,” I answered.
I reached for her as I sat on the couch, grabbing the bottom of her dress gently and beginning to pull her to face me. Once she turned around, I took her hand within mine and looked up to her, “Bennu, I love you, I should’ve told you that a long time ago, but after what I’ve been through.. I can’t lose you, I can’t lose Bahiti, I won’t allow it. I want to know that girl and love her even more than I already do, will you continue to give me that chance?” I asked, pleading with my eyes and I could see the discomfort in her expression.
I pulled at her hand and brought her closer, putting my hands around her waist and continuing to look up at her, “Please, I already had one of my children threatened to be taken away from me, don’t take Bahiti from me,” I begged.
Bennu stood there silent, looking down at me with a saddened face, “Jazon.. I can’t be with you if you’re with someone else,” she replied and I sighed heavily.
“I know.. But, I can’t not be with you, I need you now. You’re my everything, you always were.. If she ever found out about you, I’d never see them again, but I’m willing to risk it. Please, say that you won’t leave me again, not this time,” I continued, a frog forming in my throat and I watched as she averted her eyes from mine.
“Look at what I’ve done already.. Jesus, you’re still with her and we.. I made you unfaithful to her..” She said regretfully.
“You didn’t make me do anything! I chose it all! I could’ve stopped you or myself and told you everything on the spot, but I didn’t. It’s my fault, not yours. I needed you, I was desperate to be with you again. I’m sorry for making you think I was available, I should’ve told you everything last night at my office or when I came over. But I’m telling you now, does that count for nothing?”
“I need you to go,” she answered, my heart dropping into the bottom of my stomach and she pulled away from me, turning her back to me once again. “You said yourself that she’ll take them away from you if she found out about me or Bahiti, but I will not stand here and let that happen, nor will I be kept a dirty secret while you continue to get everything that you want. I won’t keep you from Bahiti, but we are nothing now, do you understand?”
“No,” she cut me off, turning around to face me with angry eyes, “You need to decide, Jazon.. Bahiti is already head over heels for you, but I will not be your side woman while you continue to be with her!”
“I’d lose them, I know, she’d never let me see them again, but I cannot lose you again, not when you’re back in my life now,” I retorted, standing to my feet but she held her ground.
“Then it only makes sense for us not to be together if you have a chance at losing them! What do I do while you sit back and continue to be with her while Bahiti and I stand around waiting for you to show up at the door whenever you please, just because you already have a family! I will not be your thing on the side.. Never.. I’m sorry, Jazon, but in this case, you cannot have both of us,” she finished.
“And if I leave her?” I asked with hope.
“We’ll see if you do,” she rebutted, giving me another enraged expression and I sighed heavily, looking to the floor in defeat.
I walked towards Bennu and put my arms around her, watching her look up to me suddenly and I pressed my lips hard against hers. She struggled for a short while, but eventually stopped and stood there, accepting it. I released her from the kiss slowly and she looked up at me with softly pained eyes, “I love you, and I won’t lose you again, believe me,” I said softly, soon releasing her and walking towards the door, grabbing the knob forcefully and opening the it, shutting it sternly behind me.