“So you two haven’t done nothin’ yet?” AnneMarie asked me, watchin’ her look at herself in a gorgeous wedding gown and she saw me shake my head in the mirror.
“No.. I just don’t know if I’m ready yet, you know?” I said with a shrug.
“Yeah, but why? Jeff was a huge jerk, obviously, but Luca’s sweet. I’ve known him for a long, long time, I’ve known that whole family for a long time, and I can tell you that Luca’s someone you can definitely invest yourself in because he can do the same if you show him you’re serious.. I wouldn’t have introduced the two a’ya if I didn’t know that for sure,” she said with an ‘I told you so’ smile and I smirked.
“Yeah, I know, it’s just hard to get to that place.. He’s tried a couple’a times, but I got scared and made myself look like a idiot. He probably thinks I’m a virgin with how I’ve reacted, the poor thing,” I added and AnneMarie laughed softly.
“Well, you did get scared and with good reason, but you need to detach Jeff from yourself, and especially from Luca.. Luca is the farthest thing from him, so you gotta give him a chance, otherwise he is goin’ to think you’re a virgin and that boy will end up breakin’ up with you before he waits for you to be ready. He’s been around too much to not know when somethin’ ain’t workin’,” she added, but that still made me a bit worried, “I’m sorry.. That came out wrong.. That ain’t what I meant, exactly..”
“It’s all right, I get it.. What he’s done in the past with other people ain’t none of my business and I wouldn’t want to know, either, but.. You don’t think he, you know.. Has anythin’, right?” I asked and she laughed.
“Oh, honey, no. He’s smart when it comes to stuff like that. He’s just an outgoin’ guy that likes to have fun and there ain’t no problem with that, my point is just that he’s used to doin’ those things pretty early on and if you make that poor boy wait too long, he’ll end up not bein’ there when you finally wanna because he’ll think you’re not into him.. I’m not sayin’ he’s only datin’ you for sex, ’cause I know he ain’t, but if you don’t show him that you wanna do stuff like that, I don’t think he’ll take you seriously.. It’ll just seem like you guys are friends and nothin’ else because what if he thinks you ain’t attracted to him?” She asked rhetorically and I sighed softly, knowin’ she was right, “And, well.. If it’s any consolation, I heard he’s pretty dang good,” she replied and I gave her a surprised face.
“AnneMarie!” I scolded with a smile and she giggled.
“What? You think after livin’ out here for this long that I haven’t heard rumors about that boy? Plus, I am marryin’ his brother, you know. I know a lot more about Luca than I’d care to,” she pointed out.
“So, you’d tell me if you ever heard anythin’ serious about him, right? Even from Niko?”
“Even if Nikolai asked me not to.. If it was somethin’ I felt you deserved to know, then yes, in a heartbeat, sweetie,” she replied and that made me feel a little better, because so far, she hasn’t told me anythin’ bad about him, “How does this one look?” She asked, doing a cute pose and I looked at her from her neck all the way to her feet.
“You look gorgeous in everythin’ you put on and you know it, too, so I don’t know why you keep askin’ me,” I complimented and she smiled in a way where she knew I’d say that.
“I’m gunna go try somethin’ else on.. I think I have one left to look at,” she added and I nodded, watching her walk off to get another dress and I waited by the mirrors until she was ready.
AnneMarie was right, I really did need to detach myself from Jeff and get it out of my head that Luca is or would be anythin’ like him.. He’s never given me a reason to think that so far, anyways, besides that one time at the dock, but there’s no way he could’ve known that I’d freak out like I did, so it wasn’t his fault.. I was still embarrassed about that, even though I didn’t let it show.. I just felt like such a ditz with how I reacted and I hated that I made him feel so bad about it. I definitely overreacted. All he wants to do is be intimate with me and he has no idea why I can’t yet. The poor thing probably thinks he’s the reason why and that couldn’t be anymore further from the truth..
We’ve been seein’ one another for about three months now and ever since the situation at the dock, he’s barely touched me. We still kiss a lot, he likes holdin’ me and I like holdin’ him, but he’s completely stopped makin’ moves on me. In a way, I appreciated it, but at the same time, I didn’t want him to treat me he had to walk on thin ice around me.. It’s my fault that he does that already, but I couldn’t help but think that AnneMarie might be right.. I don’t want to wait so long to the point where when I finally am ready, he won’t be there anymore. I wanted him to be the first one that I’d be intimate with after everythin’ that happened because I trusted him, but trustin’ him as much as I do so soon into our relationship also scared me.
“What about this one?” I heard AnneMarie ask and she snapped me out of my thoughts, watchin’ her walk up to the mirrors and I was completely floored.
“Throw out everything else, that’s the one,” I said without even a second thought.
“Really?” She asked excitedly and I nodded, then hearing her gasp when she finally saw herself in the mirror.
“Oh, my goodness.. Yes, yes, I love it! Riley, it’s so perfect!” She said happily, unable to wipe the smile off her face.
“It is! How much is it?” I asked, but when she looked at the tag, the price was the one thing that could take that smile right off her lips.
“Too much,” she said sadly, “It’s eighteen thousand,” she whispered to me and I gasped softly.
“Holy hell.. How much are your parents pitchin’ in?” I asked.
“Only fifteen, so where the heck am I gunna find three more?” She seemed desperate, looking at the dress longingly in the mirror.
“Well, what about you and Niko?”
“We spent most of our money on everythin’ else.. The venue, the decorations, the reception’s food and music, the cake and the flowers,” she listed off a lot of important things and I could hear the despair in her voice, “It just figures that when I find the perfect dress, I can’t get it,” she continued and I hated seein’ my best friend so torn up.
“I could help you, if you want,” I offered and she looked to me as if I were crazy, but I wasn’t. I had a good amount of money saved up from openin’ my salon a couple months ago and business has been good to me, so I had the extra money she needed.
“Are you kiddin’? I made my girls buy their own dresses for the weddin’ because I knew we couldn’t afford it. I can’t have you buy your own dress and pay for some of mine, too. That just ain’t right,” she replied and I knew I didn’t have to help her, but I wanted to.
“AnneMarie, is this the dress you want Nikolai to see you in?” I asked and she pouted a little.
“Well, yeah.. But-”
“Nuh-uh. If this is the one, then this is the one. I don’t care if you don’t want me to help, I’m goin’ to. Just take it as a gift,” I encouraged and she gave me a look as if she was touched beyond belief.
“This is why you’re my best friend, you make me so happy.. Thank you, Riley,” AnneMarie said with a warm smile and I blew her a quick kiss, watching as she turned back around to face the mirror and I watched her glowing as she looked at herself. She looked completely stunning and so happy, which made me happy for her, but even though this was our day together, I couldn’t stop thinkin’ about Luca.
“Oh my Lord, would you just go call him already?” AnneMarie snapped me out of my thoughts again and I looked to her through the mirror.
“Call who?” I played dumb.
“Lover boy,” she teased and I laughed softly.
“I wasn’t even thinkin’ about him,” I lied, but AnneMarie could always tell.
“You are such a liar, Riley Reese. Just go call him while I go and get this dress off,” she insisted and I smiled, nodding to her words and she might have well of skipped away from how happy I could tell she was.
I stepped outside and pulled out my phone from my pocket, going through my contacts until I came across Luca’s name and I hesitated before I called him. What am I even goin’ to say? What’s my reason for callin’ him? Well, I guess I actually didn’t really need a reason, seein’ as he was my boyfriend and even just hearin’ his voice would make me happy, but.. Oh, what the hell.. When I finally convinced myself to just suck it up and call, I finally pressed send and put the phone to my ear.
“Hey, I was just about to call you,” he answered after only a couple rings and my heart was already flutterin’.
“Yeah.. Why’d you call, though?” He sounded intrigued and just by his tone, I could tell he was smilin’.
“Well, uhm, I’m just out with AnneMarie.. She’s tryin’ to pick out a weddin’ dress and I’m helpin’ her. She’s changin’ out of a dress, so I thought I’d just call to see what you were up to,” I replied.
“Oh, sweet. Did she find anything?” He wondered, knowin’ he probably didn’t care, but it was nice of him to ask.
“Yeah, she did.”
“And what’s the damage?”
“..Eighteen,” I whispered, not knowin’ if AnneMarie would want me to be spreadin’ around the price of her dress or not, but just to be sure, I tried to be quiet.
“Eighteen hundred? That’s not that bad,” he asked and I genuinely laughed at his lack of knowledge about weddin’ dresses, “What?”
“No, sweetheart, eighteen thousand,” I corrected.
“Holy fuck?!” He reacted like I thought he would and I laughed again.
“Yeah.. Weddin’ dresses ain’t cheap, hun. At least the good ones aren’t.”
“Wow.. I had no idea. I’m glad she found something, though. I bet she looks great in it. Niko should be happy,” he answered and I smiled.
“Yeah, she looks amazin’,” I replied, hesitatin’ a moment before continuin’ the conversation, “So, what were you goin’ to call me for?” I wondered.
“I was actually going to see if you wanted to meet up with me tonight.. The thing is, though, I wanted to make you dinner and I can’t do it at my place. Tavish and Pia are having some people over, but I’m not really in the mood for that, so I thought I’d see what you were up to,” he wondered and I smirked softly.
“So you’re invitin’ yourself over, huh?” I teased and he chuckled.
“Yeah, I guess I am.. If that’s all right with you?”
“You know how to cook?”
“Well, no, but I thought I’d give it a try..”
“Aw, aren’t you sweet,” I replied as I smiled warmly, “Yeah, I’d love it if you came over,” I agreed.
“Really? Awesome.. Is eight all right with you?” He asked and I nodded even though he couldn’t see it.
“Yeah, that’s fine.”
“Okay, I’ll be over around eight then,” he answered and when we said our goodbye’s, I couldn’t keep the smile off my lips as I hung up.
After paying for AnneMarie’s dress and leavin’ it at the store for safe keeping, we cut through a park on our way to a coffee shop just down the street.
“So, wha’d you two talk about?” She wondered, knowin’ I wouldn’t want to talk about it until after we got out of the bridal store.
“He invited himself over tonight,” I started and AnneMarie giggled.
“Sounds like somethin’ he’d do.. What for?”
“He wants to make me dinner,” I said somewhat proudly, as if I had any reason to show off and AnneMarie gave me a surprised look.
“Really? Now that doesn’t seem like somethin’ he’d do.. It’s pretty sweet, though. What else are you guys gunna do?” She implied a little.
“I dunno. Probably nothin’.. Watch a movie maybe,” I brushed off.
“He’s makin’ you dinner and you’re not even goin’ to let him up your shirt?”
“AnneMarie,” I scolded again like I had before and she giggled, “You gettin’ married soon sure has changed your outlook on intimacy. I’m startin’ to think you might be some kinda tramp underneath it all,” I teased and she scoffed.
“You watch your mouth, Riley Reese. I’m no tramp, I’m just gettin’ a little impatient and excited. Niko and I have done everythin’ else except for sex, but if everythin’ else feels half as good as sex will, then I’m excited to experience it, that’s all, especially if he’s the one I get to experience that with,” she reasoned and her words made me think of Luca and I..
AnneMarie made we wonder if Luca was feelin’ the exact same way towards me, too.. We’re not gettin’ married or anythin’, but likin’ him as much as I already do made me think about how it would feel with him. He’s been patient with me, he’s respected my boundaries.. Ever since I told him I wasn’t ready, he hasn’t made me uncomfortable ever again and still, he wanted to be around me even when he was fully aware that nothin’ like that would happen until I was ready.. With Jeff, even if I didn’t want to, I’d do it anyways so he wouldn’t hurt me.. There were never any times where I’d say ‘no’ and he’d force himself on me, because I knew sayin’ no would never result in anythin’ good for me.. But, every time I’ve said no to Luca, he’s stopped.
That really resonated with me.
“What are you thinkin’ about?” AnneMarie caught my attention as we continued to walk.
“Luca,” I replied softly.
“You are head over heels for that boy, aren’t you?” She said with a coy smile and I smiled nervously.
“I dunno.. I just know that I like him a lot and I wanna have sex, but-”
“But, what? If you want to, then do it. You already know that he’s not anythin’ like Jeff, so what’s holdin’ you back exactly?” She wondered and I couldn’t even give her an answer.
“I.. Don’t really know..”
“Then do it. What are you afraid of? He’s already proven that he’s gunna be there for you. You two are boyfriend and girlfriend now, after all, and that’s very surprisin’ considerin’ his past relationship, so you should feel good that he’s chosen you to get back on the horse with and vice versa.. That really says somethin’ about him,” she pointed out.
“I guess you’re right.. But that’s another thing, I know about his past, but I’ve been scared to tell him about mine because I don’t want to him to treat me any differently.. I think he has a right to know that before we make anythin’ more serious,” I added and she looked at me.
“..You still haven’t told him about it?” She seemed surprised with me and I shook my head ‘no’ to confirm it, “Well, I really think you should.. From what you’ve told me about the times when he’s tried to touch you, it sounded like you scared the heck outta him, so if anythin’, he’s already treatin’ you differently because he hasn’t tried anythin’ since.. He probably already knows that there’s somethin’ you ain’t tellin’ him, too, but he doesn’t wanna ask. You should tell him when he comes over tonight.. Find out what his reaction is,” she offered and I sighed softly, knowin’ AnneMarie was right, but it was goin’ to be a hard subject to bring up.
“What if he reacts badly? What if he doesn’t want someone that’s been through what I’ve been through..? What if he thinks I’m damaged and doesn’t want to deal with it?” I asked and AnneMarie stopped me from walkin’ any further.
“Oh, goodness, you ain’t damaged goods, sweetie, you’re just someone who’s been hurt, but, you know what? He’s been hurt, too. You were strong enough to get out of that situation yourself, you even went to a clinic to ensure that you had absolutely no ties with that devil of a man, and you got out alive. Luca, he’s had his heart broken and he’s been abandoned. I highly doubt he’ll have a problem with your past because he’s had a rough one, too. If anythin’, I think he’ll sympathize,” she advised and I had no reason not to believe her.
“I suppose you’re right..”
“Tell him.. And then, heck, after you guys are done talkin’ and you get passed all of that, you can break in that bed of yours properly,” she teased and I smiled as I laughed.
“AnneMarie!” I scolded, “You are like a dog in heat, I swear it,” I teased back and she giggled innocently as we continued on to the coffee shop.
Riley and I have been dating for about three months now and ever since I found out what happened to her back in Alabama, I haven’t been trying nearly as hard to get into her pants. Actually, I haven’t been trying at all. I made a promise to myself to treat her better, I followed my dads advice in enjoying her for who she was, and I even started doing more romantic things with her to avoid the feeling of only being friends that made out on occasion, according to Tav’s words. I’ve been taking her out on more sentimental dates instead of casual hangouts, I’ve been showing her more intimate affection rather than lustful attention, and I’ve been treating her a lot like an actual girlfriend. It was still a little difficult to get used to, but I was trying, and I think it showed. I was making progress, that was for sure, and I was even a little proud of myself.
Tonight, I offered to make her dinner, even though I’m not the best cook, but I looked up a recipe, at least.. I’ve been trying to ignore her past, but tonight, I was hoping to talk to her a little more about it, if I could get her to.. She’s been avoiding telling me about it and with good reason, but the more I talked to her and looked at her, the more I thought about it. I wanted her to get it off her chest, I wanted it to not be something she felt the need to hide from me and I wanted her to feel comfortable enough to finally tell me about it. I felt as if her past was holding her back from us moving forward as a legitimate couple.
Plus, I wanted her to tell me about it so I could stop pretending that I didn’t know all of it already..
It was still a little difficult to forget what I saw from the police report.. Whenever I looked at her, I couldn’t help but sometimes think about the pictures I saw.. Her red hair all frazzled, her black eye, her bruised face, her bloody lip.. Every time that image popped into my head, it made me angry.. It used to make me pity her, it used to make me look at her with remorse, even though none of it was my fault, but now.. Now all I feel is anger well up inside of me at the thought of the man that did that to her.
“Is everythin’ okay?” She wondered, sitting on top of the island counter in the middle of her kitchen as I stood at the stove.
“Yeah, why do you ask?” I played off as if it was nothing, but maybe my actions and my expressions were more obvious than I thought they were.
“I dunno.. You just seem a little different tonight. You haven’t even flirted with me once since you’ve gotten here and that’s not like you,” she said with a worried chuckle and I honestly hadn’t even noticed. I had seen her plenty of times after knowing what she had went through, but for some reason, tonight I just couldn’t get the image of it out of my head and it took over most of my train of thought.
“I’m sorry, I’m just, uh.. A little distracted, I guess,” I replied.
“What’s distractin’ you?” She asked with concern in her brow and I looked to her with a smirk on my lips.
“You,” I answered and she smirked right back, instantly getting rid of the concern in her eyes.
“Oh? What about me?” She seemed intrigued.
“Well, I don’t want to sound cheesy or anything, but.. I just want to get to know you better,” I said with a shrug, glancing down at the tile floor.
“That’s not cheesy.. That’s sweet,” she replied and my gaze was brought up from the floor to meet her eyes again.
“Yeah?” I asked and she smiled with a nod of her head.
“Yeah.. I’ve been kinda feelin’ the same way. I wanna know you better, too,” she explained and I could kick myself for not bringing this up sooner. It seemed like we were always on the same page, but both of us were reluctant to make it known. It was like we both wanted the other to say these types of things, but neither of us wanted to be the first one to do it.
“So? What do you wanna know?” She asked, moving around her legs as they dangled off the counter, as if they were a dogs tail wagging from excitement. I wanted to be as subtle as I could, I wanted her to talk about her past when she was ready to, but.. I felt as if we’d never get past the unsaid elephant in the room and we couldn’t move our relationship forward until it was out in the open.. I told her about my past, but why was it so hard for her to tell me about hers..?
“Well.. What made you move here? Like.. Are there better clients out here? Were you tired of the Alabama scene? ..Wanted to get away from someone?” I listed off a few examples, but of course, even for how simply I said the last example, the smile left her lips and my heart started to race a little with nerves.
“Why would you ask that?”
“U-Uh.. They’re just examples, babe. I can understand coming out here for a better fashion scene or whatever, I can understand wanting to come to a place with more of a modern and city-like feel to it, I can understand just wanting a different scene in general, and I can also definitely understand wanting to get away from someone.. I’ve been wanting to get out of the house for a long time and I did it as soon as I turned eighteen. I couldn’t handle my Pop’s always needing to be in my business,” I smiled softly after my words, trying to play them off as best as I could and I slowly saw her expression return back to normal and a forced smile spread across her lips.. Dodged a fucking bullet with that one.
“Oh.. Well, if I’m bein’ honest, it’s a little of all three of those things,” she admitted and my heart continued to race a little in wondering if she was about to talk about her crazy ex. I wanted her to get it off her chest and out in the open so badly.
“Shit, I didn’t know I’d hit the nail on the head right away like that,” I said with a soft laugh and she kept her smile as she looked down at her lap.
“It’s, well.. It’s a little difficult to talk about,” she replied and I nodded in understanding.
“You don’t have to say anything if you don’t want to. I didn’t mean to pry or whatever,” I answered, hanging my head for a moment, but I looked back up when she caught my attention.
“No, it’s all right.. You weren’t pryin’, you were just askin’ somethin’ you didn’t know about and I appreciate you havin’ so much interest in me, especially wantin’ to know more.. It really is sweet of you,” she said with a genuine smile and I gave her one right back.
“We don’t have to talk about it now if you don’t want to.. Really, I mean it.. I know first hand how it feels to be asked about something and not wanting to talk about it, so just take as much time as you need. I’ll be here to listen whenever you decide to tell me,” I assured her and her expression seemed touched by my words.
I turned back around towards the stove, staring down at the pot that was in front of me and there was a long silence that hovered over us in the kitchen. I didn’t want to turn around and face her again, she’d easily see on my face how much I was beating myself up over bothering to ask her something I knew was serious, but what other way could I have said it? What’s done was done and it went over a lot easier than I thought it was going to, I just kind of wished I had asked her after dinner instead of before it so I had an easier reason to excuse myself and go home. I wanted to bury my face in my pillow like I always did, but I couldn’t do that. I should’ve just minded my own business from the very start, but now I have to sit through dinner with her when all that I could think about is if and when she would finally tell me what had happened to her in the past so I didn’t have to keep hiding that I already knew. I need to be more careful with my wording, too, and never give away the fact that I already did know.
“I’m sorry,” she suddenly said, breaking the silence and I looked over my shoulder towards her.
“I didn’t mean to make things awkward,” she said with a disappointed expression and I turned towards her, stepping over to where she was sitting and I positioned myself between her legs.
“You didn’t make anything awkward. I told you that you can talk about it whenever you’re ready,” I assured her, hating that she was blaming herself for this when I was the one that purposefully tried to push her into telling me something she wasn’t ready to.
“But I bet that’s all that you can think about now, is what I’m hidin’, right?”
“I wouldn’t necessarily call it ‘hiding’ something.. You’re just not ready to talk about it and I completely understand. Really, it’s not a big deal.. You’re making it a big deal,” I said with a smirk and she smiled as she rolled her eyes, “But, really, it’s not.. I’m fine not talking about it, I promise,” I continued to try to bring her back up from this low that I put her in and when she eventually gave a soft smile and a gentle nod, I knew she had stopped beating herself up about it. She was good at forgiving and forgetting.
“Here, I’ll even change the subject for you,” I brought up and I knew she welcomed the idea when she smiled more, “I’ve been wanting to ask you something,” I continued, taking my dad’s ‘food for thought’ and making it a reality.
“Oh? And what’s that?” She asked curiously.
“..I was wondering.. If you wanted to,” I paused again, glancing down at the counter briefly before looking back up to her, “Maybe go to Niko and AnneMarie’s wedding? ..With me?” I finally asked and she raised her brow.
“What, like carpool?” She asked and I chuckled nervously.
“Well, in a sense, yes.. But, I mean more, like.. For you to be my date,” I finally made clear and her expression went softer, the smile on her lips coming back and she nodded without even really needing to think of her answer.
“I’d love that,” she replied and I couldn’t control the smile that spread across my lips.
Riley lifted her right hand and moved a strand of my hair out from covering my eye, watching her observe my face after she did so, but I couldn’t stand being this close without kissing her. I leaned in slowly and she welcomed the kiss I planted on her lips, feeling her sitting up more to get closer to me and I brought my hands up from resting on the counter to hold her hips. A few soft pecks later, our kiss grew deeper with our tongues gently intertwining and the hand she used before to brush my hair away from my eye slid through my dark strands to the back of my head. My knees crumbled every time her fingers played with my hair and my hands gripped her hips in a wanting manner at the feel of it. I was still conscious enough to know this wasn’t going to go anywhere, I didn’t expect anything after this kiss, but still showing her that I wanted her through touching her body over her clothes and through passionate kisses was important and I wanted to show her that I could kiss her and touch her without being a dog about it.. It was a pretty difficult thing to control, though.
I couldn’t help but pull away from her lips and give her soft pecks along her jaw until I got to her ear, gently nibbling on her lobe and sucking softly on her earring. She let out a hushed moan from behind her barely parted lips that she practically whispered into my ear and, fuck, this was hot. Her hand gripped a chunk of my hair again and I unconsciously pressed the front of myself against the counter she sat upon. I felt her head tilt upward and my lips let go of her ear to simultaneously lick and kiss the skin of her neck, her fingertips massaging my scalp and gently gripping my hair occasionally whenever my tongue hit just the right spot for a reaction and I tried so hard to keep myself from getting so turned on, but it was impossible. I couldn’t even put into words how badly I wanted to grab her and carry her upstairs to her bed.
“U-Uhm.. Luca?” I heard her speak with a skip in her words and a soft pant in her breath, her whispered tone still keeping me completely turned on.
“Hmm?” I wondered, continuing to kiss her neck and hoping, praying, she’d tell me to take off her shirt, or to bring her over to her couch, or upstairs to her bed, or-
“I smell somethin’ burnin’,” she warned and I pulled my lips away from her neck quickly.
Definitely not what I thought she was going to say.
“Shit!” I let out in a soft panic as I heard Riley giggle, stepping away from her hastily to go to the pot and I took it completely off the burner. I grabbed the spoon I had been using to stir and scooped up a small amount, bringing it to my mouth and tasting it, then dropping it onto the counter in disappointment. I burnt the sauce and now my pants were so tight from being turned on that I couldn’t even face her again until I talked myself down.
“It’s fucking burnt.. Here I am trying to do something nice and make you dinner and I can’t even get simple spaghetti right.. I’m sorry,” I say as I shake my head and I hear Riley continue to giggle softly.
“It’s all right, it’s just spaghetti.. We can order a pizza or some Chinese or somethin’,” she said with a smile and I chuckled.
“Yeah, let’s just do that, because clearly I don’t know what I’m doing in the kitchen,” I made fun of myself and I was finally able to talk myself down enough to the point where I felt I was in the clear to face her again.
“A valiant effort, though, if I do say so myself,” she said with the smile still on her lips, putting her hands together and clapping softly and I furrowed my brow in suspicion with a grin.
“Was that sarcasm I detected?” I questioned and she shrugged.
“Maybe,” she teased and I couldn’t help but grin more.
“Well, if someone wasn’t so good at distracting me, this wouldn’t have happened,” I teased back and she scoffed.
“You were the one makin’ dinner! You can’t blame me for burnin’ it when I’ve just been sittin’ here watchin’ you,” she made a good point and I stepped back over to her, positioning myself between her legs again and putting my hands on the counter top.
“I completely blame you,” I looked at her lips and smirked, “Your lips,” I kissed them, “Your face,” I kissed both of her cheeks and she giggled softly, “Your skin,” I leaned forward into her neck and kissed that, too, “I like all of it too much to ignore it,” I admitted and her eyes went soft and sweet, leaning forward and pressing her lips against mine again briefly.
“Let’s order somethin’,” she said softly after our kiss and I nodded, backing away a little so she could hop down from the counter and pull out her phone to order food for us.
We ended up ordering some pizza and putting on a comedy to watch, but I had been noticing out of the corner of my eye her looking at me periodically and it made me wonder if she was working up the courage to talk to me about something or if she just liked looking at me. Half way through the movie, she looked at me again and this time I decided to acknowledge the fact that she was doing it and I looked to her, too.
“What’s wrong?” I asked, extending out my hand and she smirked as she put her hand within mine.
“Nothin’, I just.. I-It’s nothin’,” she said with a reassuring smile, but I wasn’t buying it.
“No, really.. Tell me,” I encouraged, rubbing the top of her hand with my thumb and her eyes broke away from mine to look down at our hands.
“..I know I’ve told you already, but.. I like you,” she admitted again, looking back up to me and I smiled softly at her, “You’ve been so sweet to me and so patient with me. You make me feel safe, you give me butterflies every time you smile at me, and the way you kiss me makes me a little weak sometimes,” I couldn’t help but smile more, “I like you a lot, and.. It worries me how much I like you after only datin’ for a few months,” she said with a soft chuckle that sounded as if she was laughing at herself.
“Why are you worried about that?”
“I’m just worried that I like you more than you like me,” she admitted and I turned more towards her, holding her hand a little tighter.
“What makes you say that?” I asked with furrowed brows, concerned by her words.
“I just.. Have a tendency to fall for a man really quickly and I tend to bend pretty easily after I’ve done so and I don’t like it, and.. I-” she stopped for a quick moment, “I feel like I’m not makin’ any sense,” she shook her head and her gaze went back down to our hands.
“Well, please try to explain, because you aren’t making any sense right now.. I like you a lot, too, and I don’t want you to think about how much. It’s not a competition or a game to see who likes the other one more or better or anything.. It’s just one of those things that just is, with no need for an explanation or a reason.. I’ll admit that it worries me, too, just how much I like you because, well.. Because of the stuff I told you at the dock.. But, what I wanna know is what makes you worried about it?” I asked, hoping she’d finally tell me about her past and what she’s been through so we could hopefully, finally, get passed it and start moving forward.
Riley looked up from our hands to my eyes, keeping silent for a short moment before finally speaking.
“My last relationship was.. Unhealthy.. The man I grew to love didn’t show me exactly who he was until after I’d fallen for him and I was a weak person then.. I thought he’d get better, but he only got worse.. He hurt me very deeply to the point where I even had to get the authorities involved,” she explained and although I didn’t like being reminded of what she’s been through, I did like the fact that she was finally telling me these things.
“Like.. Physically hurt you?” I asked with caution and she eventually nodded.
“Yes.. I even have a restraining order against him, he’s not allowed to come within one hundred feet of me. He’s in jail now, though, thank goodness,” she answered quietly.
“..Do you mind if I ask what he’s done to you?” I wondered.
“He’d bruise me, sometimes make me bleed.. I almost always had a black eye and I avoided my friends because I didn’t want them to see me like that.. I don’t know if you can tell, but I’ve even had my nose broken, too, because of him.. And even in bed, I never said no to him because I thought that if I did, he’d only hurt me more and-” she stopped, looking away from me and shutting her eyes, bringing her other hand up to her mouth to cover it and I knew she was trying not to cry.
“Hey, hey, hey, no, don’t cry.. Come here,” I insisted, pulling her hand that I still held and she scooted closer to me, enough for me to hold her and I held her tightly.
“I was such a weak person then that it took me so long to leave him, but one day I just couldn’t take it anymore.. I locked myself in our bedroom and called the police and I haven’t seen him since, but he’s the reason I left and moved here.. I-I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner, I-”
“-You don’t have to say any more, I get it now.. It’s all right,” I assured her, grabbing her legs and throwing them over mine before pulling her even closer and I could hear her sniffling, though I think she was successful at preventing herself from letting tears fall.
“I guess that’s why I’m worried.. I’ve been fooled once before.. I’m not sayin’ you’d ever do such a thing, but.. You can understand my concern,” she continued and I nodded.
“Of course I understand, but, Riley.. You do know that I’d never do anything like that to you, right? Men who hit women are the scum of the earth and it only makes them a piece of shit human being. I’d never hurt you or raise a hand to you or anything like that and you can take as much time as you need with anything. This isn’t a relationship that will be one-sided and I’ll never do anything to make you feel like you’re lesser of the person that you are, understand?” I made sure that she knew this and I felt her nod.
“If I ever do without knowing it, you can yell at me, throw me out, throw stuff at me, spit on me, anything you want and I’ll never retaliate like he did.. But, tell me if I ever do, because I don’t want to be that person, and I’ll apologize and kiss your feet and beg for forgiveness,” I heard her chuckle softly through her emotional state and I was glad that I was making her feel better. Even hearing her laugh made me smile and hold her tighter.
When I felt Riley leaning back, I let go of holding her tightly and I could see on her face that she was passed the part of trying to keep herself from crying. She looked at me for a moment, seeing her eyes quickly flash to my lips, but she didn’t lean in to kiss me and she didn’t say anything.
“What is it?” I asked. She seemed very deep in thought and I wondered if she was going to finish telling me everything about her past that I already knew about, but I could tell that wasn’t the only thing she had on her mind.
“It’s nothin’,” she finally replied and gave a brief smirk, “You’re just.. Very good to me..”
“You don’t deserve anything less.. Thank you for telling me. I know it’s hard to think about that stuff again, but it helped me understand you better and that’s exactly what I wanted,” I added and she smiled more, “Are you all right now?” I wondered and she nodded softly.
“Yeah.. I’m great,” she answered with a smile and I held the smirk on my lips as I leaned forward and kissed her cheek for a few seconds before pulling away and putting my attention back to the movie.
I wasn’t even paying attention to the last fifteen minutes of the movie, I was too preoccupied thinking about Riley and staring at her soft, pristine skin that my hand touched. My fingertips slowly slid delicately up and down her arm, unable to take my eyes away from her body. Even though her arms were warm and relaxed, I felt a barely-noticeable layer of goosebumps whenever I guessed my fingertips were perhaps tickling her, exciting her, or teasing her. Whatever it meant, I continued to do it until the very end of the movie, but.. Fuck.
..I need to get out of here or else I’ll end up doing something stupid or something she isn’t comfortable with again.
“I should, uhh.. I should get going,” I announced as the credits rolled, Riley picking up her head from my shoulder and I removed her legs from laying over mine so I could stand.
“Oh.. Really?” She asked and I stood from the couch, but when I looked back at her, her expression seemed as if she was in a daze and her cheeks were a gentle pink.
I cleared my throat before answering her, a little caught off guard by the look in her eyes, “Y-Yeah, I mean.. It’s almost midnight and I don’t wanna keep you up,” I replied with a smirk, watching Riley stand from the couch, too, and she followed me to the door.
“Thank you for attemptin’ to cook tonight,” she said with a humorous smile and I chuckled as I turned around to face her.
“And thanks for saving the evening and suggesting we order out because I can’t cook for shit,” I replied and she laughed, bringing my hand up to gently touch her face, “I’ll call you soon,” I continued and she nodded.
I leaned down and pressed my lips to hers, keeping them there for a long moment before quickly making the kiss deeper and her arms wrapped around my neck to pull me as close as I could get to her. As our tongues danced together, her chest pressed hard against mine and I heard her let out a quiet hum of a moan from how good our kiss was and I didn’t want it to end. My hands slid down to her hips and they slowly wrapped around her, feeling the arch of her back and the dimples above her ass that were evident under the fabric of her shirt and I was getting so turned on again that I had to shake every thought out of my head in order to pry myself away from her.
When I finally ended the kiss and pulled away, I immediately turned around and headed for the door, unable to look at her anymore or else my dumb ass would find some way to ruin the moment and I didn’t want that to happen.
“..W-Wait,” I heard Riley say softly, stopping dead in my tracks and looking over my shoulder towards her. Her cheeks were still flushed and pink and her lips barely open, but it was to help herself catch her breath and I could still just barely hear how labored her breathing was from where I was standing.
“What?” I asked, still feeling my heart race and how warm my face was from getting turned on for the hundredth time tonight. She hesitated a few seconds, trying to find the words to say whatever she was going to and she shied away her eyes when she finally figured it out.
“I don’t.. Want you to go,” she answered, watching her play nervously with her fingers and her eyes came back up to meet mine.
“O-Oh, uhm.. All right, well.. What do you wanna do then?” I wondered, sticking my hands in my front pockets as I waited for another answer.
“Somethin’ I’ve been too much of a coward to do, but I want to now.. I really, really want to,” she replied and I watched as she slowly criss-crossed her arms, grabbed the bottom of her shirt and lifted it over her head.
My eyes were wide, my head was completely empty and my heart was beating out of my chest as my gaze was indecisive on where it wanted to remain.. Do I look at her face, or her breasts that were being cupped so perfectly in her bra? She gave me a soft smile as she dropped her shirt on the ground and I felt as if I was frozen where I stood.. Is this finally happening? I really do hope this is real and it isn’t a dream or my mind playing tricks on me.
“Come here,” she said softly and suddenly I remembered how to walk again, not needing to be asked twice and I quickly stepped up to her.
“..Are you sure?” I asked, my eyes unable to pick one spot on her to look at for even one second, going all over her body and my hands slid over the soft skin of her hips.
“I’m sure,” she replied, one of her hands coming down to grip mine and she held it as she turned around and pulled me along, guiding me back through the living room and over to the stairs that led up to her bedroom.
Holy shit, holy shit, holy shit-
As we walked up the stairs, each step higher making my heart race that much faster, I couldn’t believe I was about to see and be in her bedroom for the first time. I could usually see some of it from the first floor, but it just wasn’t the same. There was an entirely different feel to the upstairs. I could smell the air filled with a soft perfume that lingered from when she had put it on earlier before I arrived, the room was warm and cozy and much more calm and inviting compared to the rest of her place, and the bed looked just as delicious as Riley did from behind with her back exposed and the clasp of her bra calling my name and begging me to unhook it.. I couldn’t wait to get her in that damn bed.
When we reached the top of the stairs, Riley turned around to face me and brought her hands up to my cheeks, gently pulling me to her and our lips locked softly. One kiss after another, I slowly wrapped my arms around her, letting them adventure all over her back and she walked backwards as I followed, letting her pull me to her bed. Both of our breathing was already heavy and unsteady and Riley’s hands then came down to find the edges of my blazer and the bottom of my shirt, breaking our kiss for only a second so she could quickly pull them off and I went straight back to her lips to kiss her deeply as we continued our way to her bed.
The second I reached the edge of her bed, feeling it against my knees for reference, I laid her down and fell on top of her, Riley pulling herself onto the bed more and I followed her every move until she laid down comfortably. I pushed back into her lips and our kiss grew passionate almost instantly yet again, her hands running through my hair, her legs rubbing against mine, my left hand traveling down her body until I reached her thigh and I gripped it longingly.
My hand then found its way to the front of her pants, undoing her button and zipper and slowly pulling them down and off her legs. I then took a moment to prop myself up and look at what I had before me. I loved seeing Riley’s face and how flustered it was, but once she noticed I was staring at her, she covered her face with her hands and I chuckled at how cute she was. I leaned down again and kissed her neck, her collar bone, the tops of her breasts, every inch of skin that wasn’t covered by clothing and already I was annoyed with the fabric that was in my way of giving her as much pleasure as I possibly could, and wanted, to give her. She eventually took her hands away from her face when she knew I wasn’t staring at her anymore, feeling one of her hands going through my hair and gently gripping it whenever I kissed a spot on her that I could tell she liked.
“Take that off for me?” I implicated towards her bra and she reached behind herself to do exactly as I requested.
The second that her bra came off and she tossed it aside, I stared at her chest for a long moment, absorbing all of her body’s glory before finally bringing my lips back down to the tops of her breasts and slowly kissing my way to her hard nipples that I couldn’t even express how much I already loved playing with.
Her body went wild the second I paid attention to her most sensitive spots and her moaning was just as expressive in pleasure as her waving body was. I had been waiting so long to touch her that I wasn’t looking forward to getting passed the foreplay, but I was looking forward to savoring it and making everything last as long as I could possibly let it.
I spent a good amount of time on her breasts, messaging, kneading, biting, licking, kissing them, but even though I noticed she still enjoyed every bit of it, they were getting a bit red and raw and I wanted to move to other parts of her so she wouldn’t be too sore in the morning.. Although, the thought of her looking at her body in the mirror and even feeling what I’ve done to her the next day would force her to think of who she got that from, and knowing she’d think of me made me all the more excited.
After finally prying myself away from her breasts, I came back off of the bed, kneeling next to it and grabbing the front of her thighs that were spread around me to bring her closer to the edge. I kissed the insides of her thighs gently back and forth until I heard quiet, soft moans coming from her, letting her calm herself down a little after what I had just done to her breasts before I start on an even more pleasureful task between her legs. I reached to her hips with my hands and grabbed her underwear, but looked up to her before continuing.
“Can I take these off, too?” I asked, keeping eye contact with her as I kissed the inside of her left thigh over and over and the second that she nodded ‘yes’, I pulled them slowly down her legs to her knees.. I then took them off the rest of the way with my teeth and she seemed to enjoy it by the way she excitedly giggled at the action with anticipation written all over her face.
The only light I had was that from the dim one next to her bed, but I really didn’t even need to see anything in order to know what I was doing. I kissed the inside of her left leg from the side of her knee all the way to her uppermost inner thigh that I could go without reaching her sweet spot, then did the exact same thing to the right leg. I repeated my licks, bites and kisses starting at the inside of her knee and kissing all the way down to her upper, inner thigh, though after completely pampering her right thigh and feeling her leg beginning to shake a little, I then went to her moist center between her legs that was begging for me to give it attention.
The second that my tongue touched her, she jerked a little from being surprised, but she quickly calmed herself the more I asserted the presence of my mouth and how badly I wanted to make her feel good.. I held her thighs in place with my arms wrapped around them tightly, doing one of the things that I could do best with my tongue and hearing her moaning and feeling her body shake like a baby’s rattle within my grasp told me I was doing a pretty damn good job. I could do this for minutes, hours, days.. For breakfast, lunch, and dinner.. It didn’t matter, as long as she would let me.
It was the thing I loved most that I knew I was good at and could make any girl weak from, but this time, I tried extra hard to make it the most pleasureful that I could, even pulling out some moves I hadn’t done in a while just to see how she’d like them and it seemed to pay off by how her body reacted.. It was almost actually a little difficult to keep her hips in place because she moved around so much, her hips pulsating involuntarily to some movements of my tongue that I couldn’t even explain, but the challenge of keeping it all centered and concentrated was never out of my reach. I was a very goal-driven man, given the right attitude and task.
Eventually, however, she reached forward with one of her hands and grabbed a hold of my hair to get me to subside, but it only made me that much more turned on.
“S-S-Stop, stop, stop.. I can’t.. No more,” she expressed with an already seemingly exhausted pant and I pulled away, yet I went straight back to kissing her thighs delicately and soothingly to help her gather herself from what I just wrecked her with.
I’m not a show off, but.. That was probably my best work yet.
“Do you, you know.. Have anything?” She implied, her voice shaky and hopeful and I nodded as I looked up at her.
“I, uh.. I do, actually,” I admitted rather shamefully, hoping she wouldn’t take it as if I was expecting this type of thing to happen at the end of the date, but honestly, I was lucky that I was always so prepared.
“Oh, good,” she was relieved, “Put it.. Put it on.. Quickly,” she expressed with a panting, eager breath and I pulled myself away from between her legs to find my wallet in my pants hastily. I took the condom out and set it aside for now while I then quickly stood up and pulled my pants and underwear down to finally expose all of myself as she so graciously let me do to her and just from the look in her eyes, from what I could see, they still gleamed with excitement. I wasn’t nearly as shy as she was about taking off my clothes, that was definitely a dead giveaway. Her hips still swayed the slightest bit against the mattress in anticipation and when my eyes went from her face down to her chest and all the way down to her feet, I was completely ready.. Hell, I was ready to take her the second she took her shirt off downstairs.
The instant that the protection was secured all the way down to my base, she pulled herself back to the pillow at the head of the bed to lie on and I quickly crawled on top of her and rolled my hips against hers, teasing her even more with my hard excitement and not even wanting to touch myself for guidance. I felt my way over her moist center until the head of me found exactly what I wanted and slowly, I pressed inside of her. Riley let out a quick moan she couldn’t hold back and it was a little difficult to work in at first. I don’t know if it was from lack of stimulation lately for her or maybe this is just how tight she was, but as difficult as it was, I pressed forward until I couldn’t go any more and she could barely even let out a moan because I had completely taken her voice away.
When I pulled back slowly, then pressed forward again, I went with a little more pressure with the slightest bit of a quicker pace and her hands instantly grasped the pillow under her as if she was needing to hold on for dear life.
“You feel so fucking amazing,” I said quietly, though I was getting a little concerned with how she wasn’t saying anything and it seemed as if she wasn’t controlling her breathing properly.
“Are you okay?” I asked against her lips as I held myself still for a moment, waiting to continue until she gave me something, anything, and eventually she did.
“Y-Yes.. Keep goin’.. Slowly,” she replied and I nodded quickly in understanding, my lips going to her neck and I kissed her sensually as my hips did as she asked and I went slowly.. As slowly as I possibly could.. As slowly as I felt her delicate little body could handle and after about a couple amazingly intimate minutes, I brought myself away from abusing her neck with my lips and tongue to see how she was doing again.
“Want me to go a little faster?” I whispered against her lips and the second that she nodded, I went back in a little harder and her back arched immediately.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t-”
“N-No, keep.. Keep doing that.. Go quicker, it’s okay,” she encouraged and I instantly obliged, going a little quicker for a few minutes, then fast after a few more, then harder a few more after that until she seemed used to me enough. When I seemed to have found the right amount of pace and pressure, she vocalized her pleasure loud and clear with her lovely little mouth open and moaning.
I propped myself up so I could look down at her face and her chest to watch her breasts bounce every time I thrusted into her. I went at a quicker and harder pace now, her mouth agape and letting nothing but pleasureful moans and cries out of it, but even though I wanted to ask her so many questions, I must be doing this just as she’d like it to be done if she was reacting the way she was..
..But, I still wished I was guided a little more.. I like knowing exactly what to do like some of the many other girls would tell me when we fool around, but Riley wasn’t like any other girl anymore.. I actually wanted to please her as best as I could and the only reason I actually wanted for her to talk to me during this was to tell me exactly what she wanted and how she wanted it so I could do her justice, but, I seemed to be on my own for this one.. I needed to be so much more aware of the situation than I usually was and I was paying my utmost attention on how she reacted with everything that I did.. I’d never forgive myself if I hurt her or did any more than what she could handle or was comfortable with. She needed to be treated like the delicate flower that she was.
Her eyes were tightly shut, her arms back and lifeless against the mattress, breasts bouncing exactly how I liked them to.. She was perfect. Her hands then came up to grip my arms and body and she seemed to be enjoying everything that I was doing, but I just couldn’t help but ask.. I needed to know.
“Do you like this?” I asked through my heavy breath, continuing to thrust just as I had been so if anything changed, I’d know exactly what to do, when and where and how.
“Y-Yes, yes.. Keep going.. Go harder,” she eventually expressed, her eyes finally opening and looking up at me and I almost completely melted in her arms before I managed to compose myself and do my absolute best despite almost losing it after seeing how gorgeous her green eyes were.
I went harder, just as she asked, her back arching as hard as I had seen it go and with every hard thrust I did, I left myself inside of her for a longer second than I normally would, just so she could get the sense of feeling me at the bottom of her stomach and she cried out in pleasure every time I did this.
I hoped she didn’t mind how vocal I was, seeing as she wasn’t really saying anything at all.
“You like that? Tell me, Riley.. What do you want?” I asked again, though as if to shut me up, she reached up and grabbed what hair of mine that she could and pulled me down to her lips, kissing her passionately and I went even harder and quicker from the excitement of her kiss getting the better of me. The second that she wrapped her legs around me and her hips started to push back into mine in matching movements to make it that much more intense and to help me get as deep as I could is when I almost lost it.
This was, hands down, the best sex I’d had in a long, long time.
However, the second I went as hard and fast as I could, she broke away from the kiss to catch her breath and we both moaned against one another’s lips. I was getting incredibly close to reaching my breaking point, but I’ll be damned if I come without making her do it, too.
I could feel her getting there just as I was.. I could feel her constricting and every time she expressed internally to me that she was close, I did everything in my power to get her where she needed to be. Within no time at all after giving her as much as I possibly could, really putting my all into it, she was calling out my name with one final arch of her back and coming and I came the second I heard my name being spilled out over her shiny, plump lips.
“Holy fuck,” I couldn’t help but let out and I heard her giggle softly as I remained inside of her and she tried her best to catch her breath as I panted heavily into her neck. I struggled to breathe through my nose as I gently kissed her neck, her jawline, her earlobe, anything that was within the reach of my lips. The room was silent despite the sound of our hard breathing and once I managed to control myself a little, I laid on her to give my arms a break and her fingers delicately tracing over my skin comforted me in a way I couldn’t explain.
“I’m not crushing you, am I?” I asked in between gentle kisses on her neck and she giggled softly again.
“No.. I like this,” she whispered, feeling her fingers continuing to comb over my skin gently and it was so comforting and soothing that I could fall asleep in her arms within seconds if she kept it up.
After a couple minutes of lying there, I eventually hoisted up my exhausted body, pulled myself away from her and I removed the protection. I noticed a small trash can near her bed, getting up and tossing it out along with the wrapper and I picked up my underwear to put them back on. Riley sat up and slipped on her underwear and there was a short silence in the room that oddly made me uncomfortable. I wasn’t too vocal during sex, was I? Did I sound like a needy person? ..Was I annoying? I probably was.. Maybe I should go so she could be alone to think about what we had just done and let her figure out if it was a mistake or too soon or not.
I stepped over to my pants to pick them up and put them on, but Riley caught my attention before I could bend down.
“You can stay, you know.. If you wanna,” she invited and I looked back at her, seeing her standing with a gentle smile on her lips.
“Do you want me to?” I asked in return, a little confused at first because I was so used to bailing when everything was said and done, but I kept forgetting that Riley was different.
“Well, yeah,” she said with a shy smirk, “Of course I want you to,” she said as if it was a no brainer.
“I’m sorry, I guess I’m just not used to doing that,” I replied with a slight smirk, but she seemed to take it a different way than how I meant it.
“Well, if you’d feel more comfortable goin’ home, then that’s completely fine.. I don’t want you to stay if you don’t want to, it was a stupid question anyways, so-”
“No, no, Riley, it’s not that, it’s just-” I stopped for a moment, stepping up to her and leaning in to kiss her lips for a few seconds before pulling away. I held her face in my hands, absorbing all of her beauty and I was surprised that she even thought for a second that I wanted to leave her after inviting me to sleep over.
“I’d love to stay,” I made myself perfectly clear so there was no confusion and the second that she smiled, I leaned in again and pressed my lips against hers.
Without warning, I quickly picked her up into my arms and she let out a surprised yelp at the unexpected action, “Ready for round two?” I said with suggestive eyebrows and she laughed as I brought her back over to the bed. I crawled on top of her and pushed my lips back into hers the second that her back met the sheets, still completely awake and completely incapable of taking myself away from her. I haven’t felt anything this personal or passionate for a long, long time and I had to admit that I missed it quite a bit.. I had to tell myself that I didn’t miss it every time a girl left my bedroom, every time I snuck out of theirs, every time I had a quickie in my car.. I was telling myself that I didn’t miss it so much to the point where I really was starting to believe it, but.. Being here now with Riley and still having that deliciously fresh experience together on my mind, I realized it was something that I’ve needed for so long, I just never had the right person to do it with..
It feels good to be wanted again.