Generation 2, Chapter 20, Finale Pt 2 of 2

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This was it. I was done for. Here I thought nothing was going to happen.. I thought I could just ignore what I had done, but I was wrong. I couldn’t even figure out for myself what I had done or why I had done it. I know my father drove me to lash out, but he was never there.. He never was all of those times. It was just.. Me. How could I have been so angry to completely forget who I was talking to? Mrs. Hughes didn’t deserve what I had done to her, she didn’t deserve it at all. I wonder what was going through her mind when I was.. When I.. 

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I don’t know how I was able to fall asleep that night knowing all that I had done. Maybe I exhausted myself to sleep for how hard I was crying, with how hard I was trying to forget it, with how hard I was trying to act like nothing happened. It all caught up to me in the end though. The police barged into my home the next day. I remember lying in my bed after I had woken up to the sound of the police pounding on the door, they must’ve somehow turned off the front gate and overrode the settings, letting themselves in without so much as ringing the buzzer. The sound of the police pounding on the door echoed through the walls and even without being downstairs right then and there to answer it, the pounding was just as loud as I laid on my bed. I knew everyone was downstairs in the kitchen having breakfast without me like they had become accustom to doing and I knew that they didn’t even give enough time for Bennu to walk from the kitchen to the front door before I heard them bust in. I was surprisingly calm as I laid there, knowing what was coming, ready to accept what I had done and be arrested, but still.. I woke up exactly how I had fallen asleep, tears in my eyes and soaking my pillow. I ruined my life. I did this to myself. As much as I was trying my hardest to avoid everything, to avoid letting this darkness take me over, I failed. ..Horribly. 

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I could hear Bennu downstairs yelling at them, though I couldn’t make out her words clearly. I could also hear Lucy protesting to their barge in along with Gareth, too, assuming Bahiti and Gibson were too in shock to know how to react. I heard their footsteps climbing up the stairs as well as all throughout the house, no doubt searching for me. There was a heavy pound on the door to my bedroom and I didn’t bother getting up, I knew what was coming no matter what I would do, so I chose to stay in bed. I laid there for as long as they would let me. I laid there starring at the ceiling, thinking back on everything that I had done with my life, with my children, with my whole family.. Despite everything that had happened, it was a good life, at least as good of a life that I myself could’ve lived. I didn’t deserve any better, in my mind I was even beneath my wife and children, they were too good for me to have..

Back at the house, I shut my eyes when the door was busted open, taking one last whiff of the bedroom, filling my mind with thoughts of my beautiful wife and trying to put myself somewhere else, anywhere else. One last good memory before they take me away.. I heard guns being drawn on me and someone telling me to get on the ground with my hands behind my head, but I didn’t want to move. I opened my eyes and was ripped away from my good memory when a few officers pulled me off the bed and threw me to the floor, pinning me and pulling my hands behind my back to cuff me. They pulled me from my home, reading me my rights. I looked to my children as I was escorted out, one by one, seeing Bahiti crying, Gibson trying to comfort her, Gareth and Lucy yelling at the officers telling them to let me go, asking what I had done to deserve this.. The only eye contact I made was with Bennu and she just watched in horror, I could tell by reading her face that she knew I had done something terrible, but refusing to believe it was anything to this magnitude. Oh, how wrong she was..

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The door opened to the silent room I was in, no windows, no nothing.. Just a place for me to stew in my head. I heard the door shut behind whoever had entered and I didn’t bother looking up, I already knew who it was..

“Is this where you expected to end up?” Detective Reed Grander wondered, but I didn’t reply. “You know.. I always suspected something was off about you. Given your family history, in my mind something was bound to happen eventually.. It was just a matter of time,” he continued. I still didn’t bother to say anything, keeping my gaze upon the top of the lonely table. “Nothing to say I see.. Is there a reason you’re so tight lipped right now? I’d think that you’d be trying your hardest to maybe explain yourself so you could get outta here.. Tell me you didn’t do it.. Anything really. But, it seems like you’re not doing that because you actually did it, am I wrong?”

“You sound like you’ve figured it all out already, so why even try..?” I barely asked, “What’s the point of trying to squirm my way out of this when I know exactly what happened and why I did it.. But, even if I told you, you’d never believe me.. And I’d never get myself out of what I put myself in.. So, again, what’s the point?” I continued, looking up to him finally and making eye contact.

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“You look different.. Older. More worn down..” He replied.

“So do you..” I retorted.

I heard him let out a soft chuckle before continuing, “What’s the matter, Jason? We’ve been through a lot together already. Why are you holding back?”

“I’m not holding back anything.. I’m just not saying certain things because I know none of it would make sense to you, and I would still be in the same place that I am now.. Besides, shouldn’t I be in a prison outfit? That’s where I’m going, am I not?” I asked with anger in my undertone.

“Well, that’s simple.. When you were in the holding cell, don’t you remember rambling on and on about your father? Telling us that he was the one that made you do this? You had a pretty violent outburst, too, while in there. You needed to be sedated.”

“I.. I don’t remember that..” I replied.

“Oh, you don’t remember screaming that your father, who’s been dead for over 35 years, was the one that told you to kill Mrs. Elaine Hughes?” He asked, though I could sense the sarcasm in his tone.

“No, I don’t remember that.. And I didn’t say that, I know it.. He didn’t tell me to kill her.. I was..” I stopped, realizing he was trying his best to get me confused, trying to get me to blurt everything out, but it was harder than he made it seem. “He didn’t tell me to kill her..” I repeated.

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“Then what did he do? What did you do? You acted alone then? Of your own free will? Your fingerprints are everywhere, the bruises on her neck are a match to your hand size and you have faint marks on your wrists under those handcuffs that are a sign of a struggle.. She tried so hard to get you to stop, what kept you from stopping? Surely she was screaming, or at least trying to.. You didn’t hear it, or did you ignore it?” He asked.

“Like I said.. It’s too hard to explain and you’d never believe me..” I replied, turning my head to the left and looking to the wall that I knew was a two way mirror, wondering who was on the other side listening in.

“I have all the time in the world to try and understand where you’re coming from.. And you have all the time in the world, too, to try and explain yourself.. Why’d you kill her?”

“I didn-” I stopped, knowing by how he was responding already that even if we were here for weeks, he could never put himself in my shoes for even but a moment. “I wasn’t trying to kill her..”

“Then who? Who were you trying to kill?”

“..I told you.. You’d never be able to understand..” I replied quietly.

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“Try me..” He challenged, yet it didn’t come off as such. It was as if he actually wanted to know, as if he wanted to sympathize for me. But, who was I kidding.. Even if I did tell him the whole truth, everything from the beginning, I’d still end up in the same place. I’d still end up rotting in a cell, or worse, rotting in a room surrounded by white padded walls. 

“I just want to see my family..” I ignored his proposal, seeing his expression turning rather reluctant and he shook his head.

“No.. That’s not an option right now, Jason.. You can already assume that you have no visiting rights right now given the degree of what you’ve done. There’s honestly no telling what could happen. So, I’m sorry to say, but you won’t be seeing any of them anytime soon,” he replied and my heart dropped in the pit of my stomach.

“I can’t see my own wife!?” I called out angrily. I knew I was in more trouble than I could handle, but all I wanted to do was talk to my wife.. I wanted to explain myself to her more than I did to the detective.

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“No, sorry.. You can’t,” he replied, “You’re in confinement.. You’re not allowed visitors, you’re too dangerous and I can’t risk the lives of your family..”

“You really think that I would hurt her?” I asked, my tone quiet and filled with grief. I waited for a response from him, but didn’t receive one, “Do you really think I’d harm any of my children?”

“I honestly don’t know what to think right now, Jason.. You haven’t told me a single thing yet. You just keep saying how I won’t understand, no one can understand what you did or why, but that’s what I’m here to figure out.. In my eyes right now, in everyone’s eyes, you’re a murderer. You killed your daughter’s grandmother, and now that I look back on a few things, I even have reason to believe that you might have even killed her mother.. You remember Lana, don’t you? Your two’s past was pretty rocky, was it not?”

“I..” My voice stopped. I was going to stick up for myself, deny me killing Lana, but I couldn’t.. I just couldn’t say the words. They already have evidence of me killing Mrs. Hughes, what’s the point of denying Lana’s death when I’m going to get life in prison, anyways? What’s one more murder? Either way I look at it, even if I were to get off in fifteen or so years, no one would feel the same regardless. Lucy would still hate me, she’ll probably never talk to me again.. Bahiti will be too scared of me.. Gareth and Gibson will either be grief stricken, angry and appalled, or worse, inspired by my actions.. And Bennu? Who knew. I assumed she would most likely want a divorce. Even if she still wanted to be with me, there’s no telling what could happen should I ever be let out. What if it was her I was talking to instead of Mrs. Hughes? Would I have done the same thing? Would my mind have gone to my father again? In the end, I guess the Detective was right, there is something wrong with me. The detective was right, too, to question whether or not I might hurt my own family.. Even if I had no intention of hurting them, there’s no telling what I would do. There’s no telling what could happen.

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“You.. What?” Detective wondered, wanting me to continue where I had stopped myself. 

“I, um..” I began again, adjusting myself a little and the sound on the handcuffs around my wrists jingled a little, constantly keeping me from thinking of anything else. I fidgeted, I didn’t know what to do with my hands or any part of my body, there was nothing I could do that he wouldn’t pay attention to. “I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I didn’t even think that there was anything for me to be concerned about. I had a pretty normal life for the most part.. Well, no.. That’s a lie. My life has never been normal, or easy, the farthest from it, actually..” I continued, letting out a pathetic chuckle at myself. 

“I don’t think anyone really has an easy life. Or at least if it comes off as such, they’re lying to themselves,” Detective Grander replied.

“I’ve been seeing things my whole life. When I was a boy, I saw a dog, one that I’m convinced my father had killed in cold blood.”

“Like a ghost?”

“I guess.. Yeah, like a ghost.. After my father had blown up our old house and killed himself and my mother, I never saw the dog again. After I had found out about the birth of my daughter from my wife now, I started seeing my father. Bennu and I had gotten into a fight, or rather, she kicked me out of her apartment when I told her about Faline and my other children. I went to the cemetery like I always do when I’m upset. I go there to vent to my mother, but of course not literally.. I talk to her headstone. I didn’t even believe it myself at first when I saw my father there. He showed up only a few times as the years passed, mostly only when I was angry or sad. But, it became more and more frequent to the point where it was every day.. Once, twice, maybe even three times. I talked to him more than I talked to wife and children and he was never even there. I regret a lot of things in my life, but I could never regret the choices I made that led up to each of my children. They’re the only thing I’m ever completely sure about.”

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“Do you regret killing Lana and her mother?” He asked and I widened my eyes as I felt anger built up inside of me.

“I never admitted to that!” I called out, “You’re putting words in my mouth when I’m just trying to explain myself!”

“What are you explaining yourself for if you claim you didn’t do anything wrong?” He wondered and I sighed harshly, he knew exactly what he was doing and even with me trying to hardest to avoiding a confession, it seems that I’ve already said too much anyways.

“Fine! You want to hear it? I killed Lana! I killed her mother, too! Lana had it fucking coming because she was a controlling, jealous bitch who only wanted my money, lied about Lucy being my daughter and then threatening to take her away from me when I had done everything in my power to keep them provided for! Mrs. Hughes didn’t deserve what I did, though! I never wanted to hurt her, I went to her for help, for Christ’s sake and look what I did!” I blurted out, “My father wasn’t the one who told me to kill them, I killed Lana myself, it wasn’t until a few days later that I remembered what I had done.. I had blacked out. I should’ve turned myself in, but how could I? I had Lucy and the twins to take care of at the time. If I had turned myself in, Lucy would’ve had no one but her real dead beat father who didn’t even fucking want her..”

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I continued my angry rant, “Mrs. Hughes should still be alive, though, I regret what I did to her more.. The few times I’ve gone to her, she liked to put me under, hypnotize me.. But, this time when she did it, I woke up in a different state, everything felt heavy, it was this indescribable presence that made me uncomfortable. But, when I looked to where Mrs. Hughes was sitting, it wasn’t her.. It was my father..”

“So, was it Mrs. Hughes talking as your father, or was it his own words? You’re own words?” He asked.

“It was him..”

“And what did he say?”

“I’d rather not repeat his words..” I somewhat requested, feeling uncomfortable telling him that I had thoughts of killing my own sons, even after praising them so much in front of the detective.

“Well, I suppose I don’t really need to know, seeing as it still wouldn’t change where you’re going,” the Detective replied.

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I looked to him once more and swallowed hard, “Where am I going?”

“I guess there’s no easy way of saying this, but you’re going to be living in a facility that helps people like you. There’s clearly something amiss, you’re not just some guy who goes around killing people for pleasure or just for the hell of it. You need to be rehabilitated, get your anger in check and also your head.. I don’t know how long you’ll be there, that’s up to your progress, I suppose.. But, hey, at least it’s not prison,” he replied. I was in shock, I always knew there was something wrong with me, I always knew subconsciously that I wasn’t all there in the head, but hearing it outright like that and it being spoken of so bluntly from him hit me like a brick wall.

“What, like an.. An asylum?” I questioned, watching him stand there without a response, “Will I at least get to see my family before I go?”

“Maybe.. I like you, Jason, even despite what you’ve done. You seem like a really good guy who just can’t control himself.. I’ll see if I can put in a good word for you so you can see them before you go, I make no promises though..”

“Oh.. All right, thanks, I guess.. Um, when will I go? Where is it?”

“Pretty soon, probably within the next few days. You’ll be in a holding cell by yourself until we can transfer you, so you won’t have to worry about other people and so we don’t have to worry about you hurting anyone else. And where you’re headed is a little place just outside of the town Lucky Palms, Arizona. Only a few hours from here. It’s nice, a good place for people to heal.”

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I hung my head and starred at my lap, this was all a little hard to take in and accept, but I assumed it was the best for me. He was right, I’m not a man that craves blood or craves killing people, it just happens.. I was the last thing on my mind, I didn’t care what happened to me, all I wanted was my family to not have to be put through this, but there was no avoiding it now. I already made their lives harder because of what I had done. I had made their lives more complicated and there was no way for me to avoid it. As much as I had tried to steer myself clear of making problems, things only got worse. 

“Everything is going to be fine, Jason.. Just have a positive attitude and be open to change, have an open mind about going to this place so you can get help so that you don’t have to live your whole life there without the ones you love most,” the Detective continued, but I still continued to hang my head in shame. There was so much for me to do in order to help myself get better, but I still couldn’t help in thinking how my family is going to react to hearing the truth and everything that I had done. Nothing was ever going to be the same again. 

“Thank you, Detective..”

“For what?”

“I.. I don’t know. I just feel like it needed to be said.”

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There was a long silence before he finally answered me, “Good luck with everything, Jason..” He replied, turning around then and making his way out of the room.

I slowly shut my eyes and tried to take a few long, deep breathes. I needed to keep my wits about me now more than ever. Keep quiet, keep calm, just breathe.. But, how can I keep calm when I’m going to an asylum? How is being around crazy people supposed to help me? I’m not crazy, I just.. I see things. Things that aren’t real and aren’t there.. That doesn’t make someone crazy, right? Well, I guess apparently to them it does. What the hell is my family going to think?

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Lucy is never going to forgive me.. Never. Bahiti will always be frightened of me, she’s already quiet enough as it is. Such a sweet and innocent girl being forced to deal with a father that’s been committed of murder. I can’t possibly think what’s going through the minds of my boys.. If they’ve done things similar already, which I still was never completely sure about, are they going to take after me like I did with my father and the fathers before them? I was unsure about the boys, but I knew my girls will never get over this. And Bennu.. I’ve never loved someone as much as I love her. She’s my everything, and I’ll most likely lose her because of everything I’ve done. No matter how I look at it, I’ll always be alone now. No one can save me now, not even myself.

I put my arms up on the table and leaned over, my arms supporting my weight as I sat there and let it all sink in, “This was it..” I quietly told myself.

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“I’ll always be here for you, Jason.”


End of Generation 2.

Generation 2, Chapter 20, Finale Pt 1 of 2

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I always told myself I hated coming here, to the one spot where I knew there was nothing I could do to change anything, but I still kept coming back. No matter how much I starred at my mother’s grave, I knew I’d never see her again. Yet, when I looked at my father’s headstone, why was he the only one that chose to show themselves? Why not my mother? Out of all the advice I could ever think of asking for, she was the one I wanted solace from, the only one who could calm me back down to a more rational state. Out of all the people in my life, my mother was the only one who’s opinion mattered to me. Even my own wife couldn’t do my mind justice and so far, it seemed a little weird to me that even she couldn’t since I’ve been with her for more years than I ever even knew my mother. But, like the old saying goes, mother knows best, I don’t plan on disappointing her anymore. I admit that looking back on all of it now, if I had never lost my parents, my life would more than likely be completely different and probably going up a more genuine and fulfilling path with less chaos and torment, but there was no way to change any of that now. I am where I am, but that’s what scares me so much, too.

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The annoying rain didn’t help my already agitated mood. I should be happy, my father hasn’t showed his soul-quivering face around me since the night that Lucy had gotten home from college, which was roughly a week ago and she’s back there now to take her finals. But what bothered me more was why he suddenly just stopped. He goes as far as to come back from the dead and toy with me from beyond the grave after all the pain he’s already caused me and my sisters. And now, he’s nowhere to be found. What the hell is he trying to prove to me? Why does he try so hard to go out of his way to treat me like this? 

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I came here to talk to my mother, to let go of some stress and to maybe feel like I have nothing to worry about when seeing Mrs. Hughes after all of these years. I took Lucy’s advice and knew something wasn’t right, but I haven’t told anyone that I’m trying to seek help again like when I was little. I wanted to come here and tell my mother my plan to get better, how I won’t let anyone else but me control my life, but I can’t focus. Every glance that I try not to do towards my father’s grave only makes me think about him more and wonder why, out of the passed 4 years of constant torment, was he not here now? I don’t know how long I was standing there, feeling my expressions turn from one emotion to the next as I try to contemplate if I’m doing the right thing. When my father was around, he tried to convince me to do the most unthinkable things and it helped me say no to not only him, but to myself as well. But now, without him here, telling me either to go to Mrs. Hughes or don’t, I don’t know if what I’m about to do is going to be what he wanted or not.

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The longer I stood there, the more I realized that nothing was going to become of itself unless I act. As I looked down to my parent’s graves, the ground below me getting softer and I had sunken in a little to the soil soaked by rain, I decided that it was finally time to leave and try to figure out if going to Mrs. Hughes was the best thing for me. Maybe if I went there just once and see how it went, things might get better, or things might get worse. If they get worse or if I don’t feel some kind of change, I just won’t go there again. If things go well, then maybe there still is a chance for me to let all of this go and just live out a normal life with my family.

I left their graves and went back to my car, turning it on and letting the inside warm up a little before making the fifteen minute drive into the city to see Mrs. Hughes. Even as my fingers grew warm and the heat had brought me back to a comfortable temperature, my hands shook the slightest bit and I rubbed my hands together roughly to get it to stop, or at least to keep me from seeing it.

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I got to Mrs. Hughes’ office and walked in, shutting the door behind me as to not let in anymore of the chilly winds from outside. A grimace took over my face when I looked around and up towards the second floor where I knew she was. I looked back briefly towards the front door and did just as I did when I was here as a child, I looked back at it and contemplated bolting out and not giving this a chance at all. But, the moment I did, I could hear the secretary calling out my name to say Mrs. Hughes was ready for our appointment. My mother was the majority of the reason why I came here in the first place. She’d want me to go. I guess I have my mother’s intuition when it comes to knowing something isn’t quite right with me.

The secretary wasn’t here today. It being a Saturday, this might be her day off, so was Mrs. Hughes here all on her own? The door was open, but maybe they just forgot to lock it? 

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I finally made my hesitant ascent up the stairs and could almost hear my mothers footsteps going up the steps before me, waiting for her to reach back and tousle my hair as to calm me down, knowing I didn’t want to do this. But, I felt nothing. I stepped down the hallway and stopped at Mrs. Hughes’ door, but before going in, I looked over towards the couch by the window and could picture my mother sitting there just as she had done before. I had asked her why she wasn’t coming with me, but she told me I needed privacy. I could hear the next thing she said to me back then over and over in my head now, “Go on, it’ll be fine. I’ll be right out here if you need anything at all..”

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Her words were like a symphony now instead of how it sounded like just a sweet lullaby back then. I could picture her encouraging smile, hear the hum of her soft nature as she gestures me to go forward. At first I was nervous, ashamed a little, even terrified that whatever I said wouldn’t stay behind this closed door and somehow my father would know and only resent me more. My mother’s words repeated again and I took a deep breath, feeling the nerves within me calming again and I was ready to step through the door of the office and try to get help for myself.

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I opened the door slowly and quietly, seeing that the light in her office was on and I knew she was there. I opened it more and the door didn’t so much as creek in the slightest, keeping my presence unknown for the time being. I saw Mrs. Hughes sitting on her sofa, the one I had sat on so long ago and old memories filled my mind as I looked around the room. The room still smelled of old lady perfume that seemed to have gotten more potent and aged over the years, just as Mrs. Hughes had. The last time I had seen her it was at Lana’s funeral and we only had a few-minute chat and then I left. 

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I shut the door behind me quietly and Mrs. Hughes still seemed to not notice me, continuing to stick her nose in the book she was reading and I stepped more into the room. I cleared my throat louder than needed and she looked up, closing her book and adjusting her glasses to try better at making out who I was. “Yes? Can I help you?” She asked and it took me a moment to speak up.

“Mrs. Hughes, it’s Jason.. Dubois?” I eventually replied. 

She squinted her eyes a little to help focus better and soon a smile spread across her lips, “Jason! It’s wonderful to see you!” She said happily, catching me off guard a little, but I soon smirked in return as to not be impolite.

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Mrs. Hughes made her way over to me, holding out her arms and requesting a hug as she continued talking, “My goodness, it’s been years since I’ve seen you. How have you been?” She asks as I hug her in return warmly.

“I’ve been all right.. Lucy is taking her finals now in college.. So are the twins and my youngest daughter in high school.. I couldn’t be more proud, I know they’ll all do wonderful,” I replied with a confident grin.

“My gosh, are they all to that point already? It must be driving you mad with all those young adults running around the house,” she said with a gentle cackle.

“Oh, it’s not so bad.. I love having them around, even if Bennu and I want to rip our hair out sometimes,” I replied with a chuckle, “Enough about me, how about yourself?” I wondered back.

“Good.. Very good, don’t worry about an old woman like me when you already have enough on your shoulders.. You seem well, though, you get more and more handsome every time I see you,” she compliments and I let out a soft chuckle.

“Not as beautiful as you with each passing day,” I replied.

“Oh, come now..” She contested with rosy cheeks, “Well, don’t let my blabbering keep you from making yourself at home. Please, sit, dear,” she offers and I nod in acceptance.

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I took a seat where she was upon the sofa and she took the single chair to my left, the one she always sat in during any of her sessions. “So what brings you back here at this time? Usually I don’t make appointments on Saturdays and just look over my patient files. Or, like you’ve caught me, catching up on a relaxing read,” she chuckled gently.

“Oh, well I apologize for intruding. I was just hoping to catch you and maybe ask for a little help. Like old times,” I answered and her wide smile faded just slightly.

“Like old old times?” She questioned and I nodded. “Well then, please.. Continue. What’s on your mind? The last thing was discussed was you talking about your father, we even tried the hypnosis, didn’t we?”

“Yeah, I don’t remember what happened though. You’ll have to remind me,” I replied and she nodded slowly, her eyes wandering around the room as she tried to remember.

“Well.. While in hypnosis, you were in your bedroom and there was a baby boy crying. You couldn’t open the door to leave, you heard your father talking to someone, a dog barking. Your father came in to calm the baby and to get him to go back to sleep. You got a little rattled, hearing your father coming back up the stairs after leaving the room and you hid in a corner. You said the dog sounded scared. That’s when you started not to respond calmly anymore and I was forced to wake you up.” She replied and I was impressed by how much she remembered of the situation for it being almost 35 years ago.

“I had been seeing the dog before my mother brought me here, that’s the biggest reason why we came..” I honestly answered, “I still saw him after I left here and he helped my sisters and I escape my house before, from what I’ve come to believe, my father was able to blow it up. I still don’t know if my sisters were telling the truth, that they really did see the dog like I did, or if they were only humoring me.. But, either way, we got out.”

Mrs. Hughes seemed bothered by the news, but she didn’t act on whatever she was honestly thinking, “So, are you seeing the dog again? Is he what brought you here for more help?” She asked and I withdrew from her a little, looking down to my lap and eventually shaking my head ‘no’.

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“Then, what is it, Jason?” She continued.

It took me a moment to reply, she would only think I was crazy, but then again, I came here to get help and withholding anything now would render this visit pointless. “I’ve been, um.. Seeing my father, instead..”

“I see. What does he say to you? How often does he just show up?” She wondered, seemingly not wavered by my words, so I continued with less hesitation.

“He’s.. He’s been telling me to do things that I just can’t do. But it’s driving me up a wall because no matter how many times I say no, he continues to persist as if I’ve never told him no in the first place. It’s an ongoing loop that just never seems to stop.. He used to show up only every now and then, but the more years pass, the more I see him, and I’ve been seeing him for a while every day up until about a week ago.”

“Well, if he’s gone now, then why have you come? Do you think he’ll come back at some point, maybe you won’t have control?” She wondered and I thought for a moment before finally nodding.

“Yeah, I just.. I don’t know what’ll happen the next time I see him, or if I’ll be able to stop whatever he tells me to do,” I replied.

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“Well, how do you usually feel when your father comes? Are you sad or angry? Lonely?” She asks and I think for a moment.

“I’m never lonely or really that sad. I suppose it’s when I’m stressed or mad,” I reply.

“So you’re already angry when he shows up and he only increases your anger then, would you say that’s correct?”

“Yeah.” I replied quickly, seeing that maybe we were getting somewhere.

“It seems to me that you still hold on to your father more than you may think. As much as you might resent him, hasn’t he been someone that you’ve maybe strived for approval from?” She suggested and I grew a little angered. “I know you may be a little reluctant to believe this, but maybe you wanting to make your father proud is passed the time you’re able to, so you go to him now for approval since you didn’t get to when you were a child. All you did was stay away from one another, but didn’t you always, somewhere deep down, want to find a happy medium with him?” She continued. As much as I hated to think about it, the last time I saw my father was when he and my mother were telling my sisters and I goodnight before he carried out his gruesome plan. I had asked them for a puppy, something to distract me from seeing Archor and my parents had agreed, my father was first to say yes. He compromised for me, agreed to give me something that would make me happy and maybe even like him more, but at the same time, I feel like he was only doing that to give us something happy to think about when we went to bed before he murdered us all. Mrs. Hughes’ voice snapped me out of my thoughts, “Jason, would you want to try hypnosis once again? We seemed to get pretty far when you were a child, maybe we could surface some more things now that you’ve matured?” She offered and I nodded, agreeing to her logic and we went through the routine there was to put me under.

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“Jason..? Can you hear me?”

“Yes.”

“Where are you? What do you see?”

“I’m in the backyard. My mother is scattering hay for her horse. She takes a break and looks over to me. Her smile is as bright as the sun.”

“How old are you?

“I.. I think I’m 5.”

“Good.. What else do you see?”

“My mother comes over to me and throws me around. I’m laughing.. She takes me inside and puts me on the couch to watch TV. My father is in the kitchen and she goes to him, but they.. They start fighting.”

“Why? What are they talking about?”

“I can’t hear them. My father’s voice is so low, my mother only speaks a loud whisper so I don’t hear.”

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“What’s happening now?”

“I get off the couch. I’m mad. Madder than I’ve ever been.”

“What do you do? Why are you mad?”

“I go towards the kitchen. I want to stop their fighting. I want my father away from her.”

“Jason, it’s all right.. Calm down,” Mrs. Hughes says as I can feel myself squirm in discomfort.

“It’s my first time standing up to him. I want him to stop, but he grabs her arm. I’m scared.”

“Scared? Scared of your father? Scared for your mother? Yourself?”

“I.. I just want him to stop.. Stop it! STOP!”

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My eyelids flew open and the whole room had changed. I felt.. So different. My entire body was hot with rage. I could remember Mrs. Hughes and I talking, I was calm.. Yet out of nowhere there was this anger inside of me that I couldn’t extinguish. I was out of my realm of comfort. I had felt this before.. But where? When? ..Why?

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“Do you feel it?” I heard Mrs. Hughes voice, yet it felt as if my ears had been plugged and her words were muffled.  I could make out what she was saying, but barely.

“Feel.. What?”  I asked, blinking harshly a few times as I looked to her and I sat up slowly. I looked around the room, noticing that the whole room had grown heavy and it seemed as if gravity had increased tenfold. It was hard to move, like how you feel in a dream, like when you want to do something so bad but your blows are lessened greatly and it feels as if you’re causing no change at all.

“The anger.. That hate.. You feel that, don’t you?” She asked, yet her voice grew deeper and more menacing. 

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I looked back to where Mrs.Hughes was sitting and my eyes widened in shock when I saw my father, “How do you feel, son?” He asked, his voice getting less muffled and easier to hear as he continued his words, “Do you feel at ease where you are?”

“No.. Of course not. I feel terrible,” I replied angrily, “Why the hell are you here!? Now out of all times to show up!” I yelled.

“Calm down, Jason.. You’re only acting on what you’ve been feeling from day one. Hatred.”

“Shut up! Why are you here? Where is Mrs. Hughes!?” I demanded to know.

“She’s here. But she can’t help you anymore. Only I can. Weren’t you worried that you’d never see me again?”

“Pah! Don’t put yourself so high on a pedestal, you piece of garbage,” I replied angrily.

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“Come now, Jason.. I can’t be all that bad. You once wanted to accept me just as much as you wanted acceptance from me, is that not true?” I held my tongue, not wanting to give him the satisfaction he much desired. “See? Even now you dare not talk back to me when you were so willingly able to when you were younger. You just wanted attention, didn’t you? ..Well, now you have it.” He continued.

I didn’t know what to say really. That could’ve been the right answer, then again I was never sure of what I wanted.. I was too young to realize, but now at a grown age, not knowing anything that may have been, I had no idea what I wanted from him anymore. “Why are you here? What the hell do you want..?” I asked in a defeated tone, my comprehension of things seemingly at a loss.

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“You know damn well what I want!” He raised his voice, stirring me a little and I hate to admit that I flinched in fright towards him, “You know what you must do yet you refuse to admit it!”

“I will not kill my children!” I yelled back, recalling what he has always told me now, “I’m not you! I can’t act on something when I don’t believe it! I’m not crazy, and neither are my boys. Just leave them out of it. Leave them out of it all!”

“Like I have a choice! If it were up to me, I’d let them live. But they are an abomination. So are you, and so am I! Stop denying it and see it for what everything really is, dammit! Stop being so stupid and get rid of the things that are only going to cause more pain like everyone else in this family before you has done!” He called back, refusing to back down from what he’s been telling me for the passed 4 years of first seeing him.

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“No..” I tried to reply calmly, “Nothing you can say will make me change my mind about my sons or my own life,” I replied, seeing him get more angered and he stood to his feet. Adrenaline forced itself throughout my body and I wanted to stand as intimidatingly as he had, yet for some reason I couldn’t move my legs. 

“How dare you talk to me like I am a stranger passing you by on the sidewalk! I am your father and you will do as I say! Whether you choose to believe it or not, this is the truth and it is what needs to be done, Jason! The sooner you realize that, the better!” He yelled back, his booming voice no different and still completely terrifying just as it was when I was a child. But, I wasn’t a child anymore, I had my own family to protect and he hasn’t been a part of it ever since he died when I was still but a few years younger than being a teen. I’ve told him no before, I can do it again.

“Everything is my choice now, my decision! Not yours! These are not your children to just do as you wish with them and cast them out like a common piece of trash!” I retaliated.

“Don’t worry Jason, since you’re not man enough to do it, I’ll just have to do everything myself!” He threatened, catching my full attention. I knew he wasn’t real, I knew he wasn’t there, but his words were something I couldn’t escape and just what he’s been able to do to me proved that maybe he could do worse to my children. I grew.. So angry.. So, so enraged.

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“You.. Will not, touch them!” I yelled with a voice I was unfamiliar with myself, even though it came from me. I jumped up from my seat upon the sofa and lunged at him, quicker than he could react and before he could stop me, my right hand was tightly clenching his throat and I refused to let go. His hand clawed at my wrist, but it held tight even under his immense pressure in trying for it to stop and I could feel my grip only tightening around the strained tendons in his neck. I never wanted him to get away, not this time, not again. He can’t leave me now and I finally have him where I want him. He’s at my every whim, he’s at my mercy where there is absolutely none and I hope he soon realizes that there is no hope for him anymore. There is no getting out of this. What happens, happens, and what happens is final. I won’t let him control me anymore.

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I managed to keep my grip on his throat but the more he pulled back, the more I lost my balance and I tumbled slightly over the fabric covered table that doubled as a coffee stand, falling over him but making complete sure that my hand never let up upon his throat. I fell over the coffee table and on top of him, straddling him and my left hand was then brought to his throat without a second thought. I clenched as hard as I could, hearing his throat gurgle and beg for air, but the more air he let escape from his lungs, the tighter my grip became and it was impossible for him to breathe. He reached out, flailing his arms and squirming his legs as if to try to get free, but the struggle he put up for air was more than the struggle to get free, causing him to ultimately give in to me and cease fighting.

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It took longer than I’d like to admit to make sure my father was dead for the second time, and for good. The moment I felt his last dying breath, I felt calm, almost euphoric in a way and I couldn’t describe how happy I was. I was nostalgic. I couldn’t feel his strong struggling heartbeat under my fingertips anymore but I continued my wrath, making sure there was no return after he had fallen unconscious. For the first time in my life, I was proud of myself. I even maybe thought that my father himself would be proud of me for overcoming such a terrible, gut-wrenching obstacle. Is it all over? Am I.. Can I go on with my life? Can I live without you on my shoulder every day now? Please, let it be true.. I shut my eyes for a long moment, trying to gather myself as I still knelt over my once again dead father, trying to breathe, trying to make sense of everything. But, I opened my eyes and the last thing I had ever wanted lying before me upon the hard, thin carpeted ground.

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“M-M.. M-Mrs.. Mrs. Hughes..?” My throat caught multiple times, speaking in a struggled whisper as a gasp then engulfed my lungs.

         She was dead..

I had killed her..

         I..

But.. No! She was.. My father was.. He was there! He was.. He was the one I was strangling the life out of.. He was the one that drove me to this.. He..

       He won..

He had finally won..

                He showed me who I was..

He proved to me that I’m no better than him, I’m no better than my murderous sons..

               He.. 

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“O-Oh, God.. What.. What have I done!?” I called out, scooting as fast as I could away from Mrs. Hughes’ limp body until my back reached the softened coffee table. This.. This is what my father wanted, he wanted to show me what I was capable of when everything was out of my own control. This.. This needs to stop! How do I stop it? “Oh, God..”

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I couldn’t fully grasp what I was looking at. I had killed Lana, and now I’ve killed her mother, the woman that introduced me to her daughter and I thought I had fallen in love with. It was a false love, but what else do you feel when you’re so close to someone and find out they’re pregnant with your child, even to find out later in life that it’s not yours? I was thinking of everything.. Why did Lana trick me? Why did I act like I never knew Lucy wasn’t mine when I knew she wasn’t from the very beginning? Why did I continue to nurture them both when neither of them technically were my responsibility? Why did I murder Lana? Why is Lucy still here? Why does she love me after what I’ve done to her and hers? “What do I d-do now?” I continued to quiver and contemplate what I should do. There was nothing else I could do. She was dead, I made sure of that thanks to my father. There was no bringing her back and I didn’t know what to do.. What do I do!?

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I.. I panicked. I’m a coward, over emotional.. I can’t handle this.. I just can’t! I stood quickly from the floor, jumping over Mrs. Hughes’ still limp body and I rushed out of the door. Tears still falling down my face, I didn’t know what to think or how to grasp myself back on solid land when everything felt so thick and made of mold. Each step that I took running away from her felt as if I was running through sand. That hard, forced, muscular pace I needed to keep up weighed down on my thighs and it was hard.. So, so hard to get away from it.

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Running down the stairs felt like running down a rocky waters edge leading down to a deep pool in which you’ll never get out of. My feet kept slipping and I couldn’t seem to get a good grip anywhere.. On the way down the stairs, I contemplated stopping, calling the police, telling them I found her this way, but I couldn’t.. I just couldn’t.. I couldn’t look at her lifeless body again and I couldn’t talk to anyone about what I had seen. I couldn’t lie. I was too fucked up now to even try to be good at it. I’d fail. I’d be the laughing stock. The moment I reached the bottom of the stairs, I knew there was no going back. The moment my feet hit the carpet, I dashed through the small lobby and rushed out the door, running to my car and pulling out my keys from my pocket, yet stumbling to stop my fast pace when they fell to the grass from losing my shaky-handed grip on them. I knelt down quickly and gripped my keys along with a handful of grass and dirt, continuing to race to my car then and I pressed the unlock button as hard as I could multiple times. I got into the car and slammed the door shut, my quickened breathes making my chest work harder than normal and I felt as if I could vomit at any moment.

I’m panicking.. Slow down.. Calm down.. You didn’t..

“You didn’t mean to kill her.. It.. It was an accident..” I said out loud quietly to myself, hoping it would calm me, but it only did a little and not nearly as much as I needed it to. I started the car and backed out as calmly as I could, only to almost back into oncoming traffic that I either failed to acknowledge or even care was there. I had no idea what state I was in. I was bothered beyond belief, I could barely drive, and I had just killed someone.. 

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The only place that I saw fit to hide my dismay was my own home.. By this time, the twins were either sleeping or still out doing whatever they do.. Bahiti was for sure asleep, and Bennu was either asleep on the big couch in the living room from watching a movie, or she was asleep in our bedroom.. Knowing my family, I knew the boys weren’t home, I knew Bahiti was asleep, and for how long I’ve been gone, Bennu was asleep on the cough in the living room. I could go upstairs without a fuss and I could hopefully gather my thoughts and try to think of what to do with all that has happened. I pulled into the driveway, waiting for the stupid gate that opens for what it seems three inches a minute and I finally pulled in after my car could fit through the very small opening that I couldn’t wait to get any wider. 

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I came in through the front door silently and I heard nothing throughout the house, causing me to lessen my panic only slightly and I rushed upstairs with light feet, barely causing a sound on the steps I touched. I finally reached my room, running in and closing the door quickly yet quietly and I noticed that I was right, Bennu was probably asleep downstairs on the couch and I could let loose. My eyes never stopped watering, yet once I realized I was alone, my tears fell harder than ever and I couldn’t stop them.. I was horrified by what I had let happen, but more so on what I had done to my daughter.. My little Princess Lucy.. I had killed her mother.. And now, I’ve killed her only other relative that was close to her.. What kind of person am I? …Is this what I was always meant to do? Is this what my father has wanted me to be..? Nothing more than a plain old insane killer?

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I could barely breathe, I could barely contain myself. My knees buckled and I couldn’t support my own weight anymore. I had.. I had just killed someone.. I had just killed someone. My father warned me of with so many times before.. “Just off yourself! Everything will be fine if you’re gone!” Maybe he was right..? Maybe I should’ve just taken my own life. Maybe I could’ve stopped it all together. My sons, they’re.. They’re killers.. I’m a killer.. I’m the one everyone should be afraid of, not my father that no one else can see but myself.. I’m trying to protect my family, trying to protect all that I have left, yet I just killed someone wrongfully for what my father put into my head.. What the hell am I? What the fuck am I supposed to do with this kind of stress!? This kind of torment? This kind of absolute nothing that I’ve been dealing with all of my life? How am I supposed to stop anything bad from happening to my boys? To my wife? To my entire family!?

What the fuck do I do!?” I yelled at myself, wanting to vomit and having this constant gagging feeling in my throat, yet nothing would come out. Nothing would give me relief. Nothing would give me solace in the horrific situation of which my father has put me into.. This horrific situation I have willingly put myself into.

Generation 2, Chapter 19

Lucy’s POV

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The alarm within my dorm room went off and it was almost 6:00am, stirring me awake and I nudged my boyfriend, Lewis, in bed with me, “Time for practice, babe..” I said softly with a still tired tone. It’s my senior year of college and I’ve been working hard to get my Science and Medicine Degree for the past four years. I only have a few weeks left until graduation, but I’m not staying until the year runs out, I’m headed home today to see my family for the weekend, then coming back for all of my finals. 

Lewis and I met our Freshman year and have been inseparable since, we’re the most well known couple in the entire campus with me being popular and him the star quarterback on the college football team. Lewis is my first serious relationship and for how well things have been going, there’s no doubt in my mind that I want to marry him. But, he’s never met any of my family, and I’m not sure I want him to.

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I got out from under the covers after him and sat up, needing to get ready for my last class in an hour before I head home later. Things have been severely rocky at home and I don’t particularly like going there too much anymore, but I have to. The twins are always getting in trouble with being Seniors in High School now and acting like they’re the top dogs, I always tell them to put their rulers away and start acting like young men, but it’s hard to get through to them with their huge egos. Bahiti is as sweet and gentle as ever, still a beautifully shy girl and a Senior like the twins, yet she’s grown a little more reserved and wants to be alone most of the time. Bennu has been nothing less than a strong mother to care for all of us since Faline has passed and she’s been working extra hard on trying to keep the boys in line. Even though they never really did listen to Faline, they listen to Bennu more and you can tell that even she struggles sometimes. I look up to Bennu, she’s never once given me a reason to believe that she wouldn’t try her absolute hardest to make this family stay together, but sometimes there’s things that even the kind-hearted and strong-willed can’t handle.

Dad.. He’s.. Different. He started acting weird after I had been accepted into the college that he went to, and I knew a little why now. Freshman year when I first started was a little hard, a lot of the same teachers that taught my Dad were still here and they had nothing but bad things to say about him, though not to my face. I heard everything little by little through the grapevine and it seems that my Dad was, for lack of a better word, a slut around campus. He hardly ever did his school work either, most of the professors here were astonished when they found out he was graduating; finding out he had a daughter now, too, convinced them that I was going to be no different, but over the years I’ve managed to prove to them that I’m really nothing like my Dad, so things have gotten way better for me here. At first, I thought my acceptance into here and knowing I would hear rumors about him scared him and he didn’t want me to go here for college, but still even after I showed him how well I was doing and lying to him about not hearing anything regarding him, he’ still not the same and has been getting worse.

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“Come here,” Lewis said softly; I’m sure he could tell I was bothered by how long I was sitting on the bed doing nothing. I stood from the bed and went over to him and he pulled me into a tight, warm hug, “It’ll be okay today. Just try not to think about it so much and it’ll go a lot easier..” He tried to comfort, but him saying that only made me think about it more. I’ve told him a little bit about my family, he knows more about my siblings and Bennu than he does about my Dad, and my Dad is the one who Lewis knows makes the trip more difficult for me, even if he has no idea why. 

“I know.. It’s just hard to go back there all the time, it’s like I’m entering a completely different world and I can’t do anything to make it better,” I replied.

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“Whenever you want me to finally come with you, I’d be more than happy to. You know I still want to meet everyone, I’d especially love to meet your Dad and tell him what a perfect and beautiful daughter he’s raised,” Lewis answered and I couldn’t hold back a smile.

“I know.. Just.. Not yet,” I replied, seeing Lewis nod in understanding and he pulled me into a long kiss. 

“Are we still meeting up later before you leave?” He wondered and I nodded.

“Yeah, have fun at practice. I’ll see you later,” I answered with another smile and he smirked, kissing my lips once more and gathering his belongings to go to football practice.

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I walked into my bathroom after Lewis had gone and shut the door behind me, going straight to the tub and turning the water on so I could bathe before class. As the tub filled with hot water that soon caused my mirrors to steam over, I got out of my nightgown and tied my hair up, turning the water off as the tub grew full and I stepped in with anticipation. Baths were one of my favorite things in the world, they helped me relax when nothing else could and the warmth that surrounded me always calmed my scattered and troubled mind. There was always something for me to think about, whether it was Lewis, my grades, my friends, my siblings or my Dad, a bath usually was able to help me let it all go, at least for the duration I would be able to relax in it; the moment the plug was pulled from the drain, it all would come rushing back.

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Dad let me borrow his car while I’m here because he is convinced that keeping mine at the house would keep it in good shape for whenever I wouldn’t be at college anymore, though I think the real reason he gave his car to me was so that I had a reason to come home. I wish he hadn’t, this car is what I take so many times in one day and it smells like him; even if I needed to go somewhere to get away from it all, he’d still always be implanted in my mind wherever I went. 

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I always excelled in my classes and I always passed them with flying colors. When I’m in class, it’s the only real time I feel like I can get peace because my mind is focused on learning and challenging myself. Yet, of course, my luck runs out in the last class I have before I go home; the teacher is Mr. Dill, a friend of my dad’s from his old college days and now all I can think about is Dad again. His first name is Auturo I think, he’s talked to me before about my Dad and he was surprised just like everyone else to know that the notorious Jason Dubois had a daughter. But, he was a nice man, strict, but nice, and sometimes he favored me over everyone else.

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My eyebrows began to furrow and my bottom lip tried to quiver as the threat of tears formed in my eyes, but I shut my eyelids quickly to keep them in and took a deep breath. “Lucille, still with me?” Mr. Dill asked of me and I slowly opened my eyes, looking to him and nodding gently in response and he then continued his teachings. I took a few more deep breathes, trying to ignore everything but what was being taught so I could make it through this class without needing to be excused.

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After my class, I went to the nearest cafe and ordered something sweet for my late breakfast. Key Lime pie helped calm me a little from all of my nerves today, it reminded me of Bennu since her Key Lime pies were amazing and her cooking had now became one of my favorites next to Dad’s cooking, but he doesn’t do that too much anymore; he doesn’t like to be anywhere near the stove now-a-days, I don’t know why.. 

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After my slice of a brief heaven and before I got the chance to leave the cafe, my cell phone went off and Bennu was calling me. I smirked softly and answered, “Hey, how’s it going?”

Good, good.. How are your classes?” She wondered.

“Going well, just got out of my last class and I’m about to head back to my dorm to get ready and come visit.”

Vonderful! I can’t wait to see you, Lucy, your father is very excited as well,” she said happily and I kinda needed that, it made me feel a little better about going there.

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“How is Dad? Is he doing any better?” I asked, hearing a silence over the phone.

He.. He’s okay. He’s in our room right now resting.. Don’t worry about him, though, you just enjoy your last few hours at college and we’ll see you around 9:00pm. You’re still coming around that time, yes?” She answered.

“Yeah, I’ll leave around 6:00 so I can get home around that time.” I replied, then hearing commotion in the background and it was the boys by Bennu, both of them wanting the phone from her so they could talk to me. I let out a sigh at how childish they were despite how they constantly acted like suave little assholes. One of the boys had gotten the phone from Bennu and I listened to see who it was.

Lucy, bring Cara home with you,” Gareth demanded and I then heard Gibson in the background, “Bring her home for me, not Gareth!” “Shut up, I called dibs on her first!”

“You guys are idiots..” I began, “What makes you think Cara wants either of you?” I asked.

Please, Luce? Just put in a good word for me then,” Gareth tried to compromise and I rolled my eyes.

“Goodbye guys, see you later!” I added, pulling the phone away from my ear though I could hear them both trying to stop me from hanging up, but I hung up on them anyways. “Morons..” I said with a smirk, sighing softly as I left the cafe to go back to my dorm.

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When I had gotten back and walked through the door, I looked upstairs where I noticed one of my roommates, Paris, walking around and I called up to her, “Paris, what are you up to?” I asked, seeing her stop and smile at me as I made my way up the stairs to her.

“Not much, honey, I was just about to get ready for Darrell to take me out. You and that fine man of yours should come on with, it’ll be a double date or somethin’,” she suggested, but I sighed softly, needing to turn the offer down.

“No, I can’t, sorry.. Lewis is at practice for a few more hours still and I need to get ready to go home for the weekend to see my family,” I replied and she nodded in understanding.

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“Well, all right.. How’s your dad doin’?” She asked next.

“He’s doing good..  I’m excited to see him,” I replied, though some of that sentence was a bit exaggerated. 

“You sure? Last time you got back from visiting them you didn’t talk to any of us for a few days.”

I looked to the ground briefly, looking back up to her and keeping a small smile, “Every family has their issues, I just try not to bring those problems back with me to school,” I answered.

“I hear ya.. Well, have fun at your folk’s, I’ll see you when you get back before finals,” Paris said with a smile.

“Thanks.. See ya,” I replied, watching her turn to go back into her room and I turn around as well to head into mine.

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After about a two hour nap, I was up and ready at around 4:00 to meet up with Lewis before I went home. I stood in front of my body mirror, making any other minor adjustments to my outfit, hair or makeup that I needed to before I left. I liked to wear more conservative and professional clothing around my family, especially my Dad. I didn’t want to be anything like my Mom. I didn’t want to act like her, look and dress like her, and I especially didn’t want to do anything she ever did when she was alive and my age out of spite. I loved my Mom, but she wasn’t a very nice person, nor did she ever even really want me around, especially when she had friends over. I remember when I was super young and the only time she would somewhat show a little love towards me was in front of my Dad.. I figured out a while ago why.

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I looked at the family portrait of a few years ago when we had all gone to the Summer Festival together, I knew back then as well that Jason wasn’t my real father. About once every year to two years, my Mom’s old friend Matt would come over to Dad’s place when Faline and him were still together and Matt would spend a little time with me and leave for a long time. The older I got, the more my eyes opened and I started realizing things about him and I that seemed just too similar to ignore. When I had reached my teen years, I started to question things more and ponder what was going on; I knew Matt liked me whenever he would stop by my moms place when I was little, but every time he visited me after Mom died and I was living with Jason, Matt seemed to come by less and less as the years passed and he began acting more and more like it was a chore to come and visit me. The day that I turned 18, Matt didn’t come over anymore at all. I’m not stupid or oblivious, I put two and two together and figured it all out myself. From what I knew of my Mom, she was an evil person, and now knowing that Jason isn’t my real father, I’ve always known Jason to have a lot of money and I knew my Mom took advantage of him every chance she could get.. Always buying new things for me, the condo, and especially herself; all that money was from Jason, too. I figured she lied to him, told him I was his daughter, and did it all just to get his money. I knew Matt was my real father, but Jason is the only man in my eyes that has treated me like the Princess he always calls me. I’ll never not be proud of my Dad for taking charge and taking care of what’s his, even if it was all a lie. I smiled at the photo, then turned around to leave my room and go meet up with Lewis.

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I came out of my room and noticed Cara, my other roommate and best friend since I was in grade school, had just came out of her room as well, wearing a dress she had borrowed from me a while ago I still never seemed to get back. “Damn, you look hot.. Where you headed?” I asked, walking over towards her with a smile on my face still. 

She let out a happy chuckle, “Thanks! Paris asked if I wanted to go out with her and Darrell so I’m meeting them at the bowling alley for drinks in a little bit. I know, I know, she left like, an hour or two ago, but I like to make a fashionably late entrance,” Cara replied and I laughed as she flipped her hair over her shoulder jokingly.

“That you do.. Going with anyone else? You seem a little too dolled up to just be the third wheel for bowling,” I hinted.

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“Just going like this to maybe catch a few glancing eyes, no harm in trying to meet someone while I’m there,” she replied with a wink. “Speaking of, how are those cute little brothers of yours?”

“Ugh, swooning over you like always.. They wanted you to come with me back home for whatever reason. Well, I know the reason, but uhh, gross..”

“Mm.. A little twin Dubois action? I’m all for it,” she answered with a laugh and my expression grew a little weary.

“Again.. Gross, Cara.. They’re my brothers, and you’re not coming with me,” I stated.

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“Aww, but they’re so cuuuttee! I wanna make a Dubois sandwich with those two,” She whined, but I rolled my eyes, showing her how annoyed I was.

“Wow.. Even more gross, Cara..”

Okay, okay, I’ll  stop..” She replied, then taking a moment to look at my outfit, “Where are you headed to wearing that?”

“Going out with Lewis for a little bit and then back to my house in Bridgeport to see everyone for the weekend. Try to have fun without me while I’m gone,” I teased her and she giggled.

“Don’t worry, I’m always the one that finds the fun for us when we go out anyways,” she teased back and I chuckled, watching her walk to the bathroom and I heard the front door opening downstairs, going to see who it was.

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I looked down the stairs to see Lewis, looking up at me with his charming smile and I walked downstairs to greet him, “Wow, babe.. You look very pretty,” he said with a smile and I blushed a little as I continued to walk down the stairs, throwing my arms around him in a hug and he pulled me down the few steps I had left to help me join him.

“Thanks.. How was practice?” I wondered, pecking his lips lightly and letting him go from the hug.

“Fine.. Boring, repetitive. Glad to be outta there and with you now,” he replied and I hummed a soft giggle. “Ready for some grub before your long drive?”

“Of course,” I answered, watching as he opened the front door for me and I exited before him to go to my car.

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Lewis and I got dinner together at the campus diner, staying there until it grew dark outside and it was passed 6:00. I was late to leaving, but Lewis and I were enjoying ourselves and I wasn’t ready to go home yet. He took hold of my hands and intertwined our fingers, pulling me closer to him, “You should get going, don’t you think? You don’t want to get there too late at night,” he suggested and I let out a soft sigh.

“You’re right.. Even though my Dad would stay up waiting for me until who knows what time,” I said with a light chuckle.

“Still, you shouldn’t make him wait. He’s going to think less of me and think I’m the one who made you late. I don’t want a bad impression with the guy when I haven’t even met him yet,” Lewis added with a smile and I sighed; he was thinking into it too much, my Dad doesn’t like anyone I date regardless.. Lewis moved in closer and kissed me for a few long seconds and I knew it was the kiss goodbye that I was trying to avoid. “I love you, Lucille.. Call me tomorrow or something, let me know how you’re doing,” Lewis continued and I smiled, nodding in agreement to his request and he kissed me one last time before I went back to my car.

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After grabbing a few things from my place before leaving, I was on the road and headed back home. I drove passed the campus one last time before pulling off, knowing that I’ll be back soon, but just wanting to get one more last look. The drive was nice and a little relaxing despite my Dad’s car smell all around me, continuously thinking about him every now and then whenever my mind got off track and unfocused. I wondered how things have changed back at home, or if they even have. Dad’s been mostly staying within the confines of his room, only coming out every so often to either go to work for a few hours only or to get something to eat. He’s never really been like this and as much as I hate to wonder, I can’t help but feel like this strange nature took hold of him after I left for college. The weird things he’s been doing and the way he’s been acting makes me wonder, too, if this has been going on for a while before that, none of us happened to notice it though. I admit I probably could’ve been a little oblivious to it, Dad and I were always close, but once I got into high school, I tended to drift more towards my friends than spending time with him; maybe that’s why I never noticed until the passed few years..

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Music helped drown out my thoughts as I drove, yet it was still hard to focus on anything but the family as I got closer and closer. There were so many stars out by the college, the air was crisp and I left my windows open to enjoy the breeze as I drove away from it, but the closer I got to the city, the worse it got. The atmosphere was thick and toxic, the familiar smell of public transportation and pollution from a cluttered city leaked into the car. The stars began to get harder and harder to see, and soon when I couldn’t see any, I knew I was close. The sky was lit but not by the sun; the city lights polluted the air and it still felt like it was around 6:00 instead of the car clock telling me a quarter to 10:00. As I drove down the bridge, I was only a minute or two away from getting home. I didn’t want to be there yet, I wanted to go back and see Lewis, finish my classes, graduate without anything negative on my mind, but, my family wanted to see me; what’s more important than family, anyways?

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When I got home, the first to greet me was Bahiti. She had grown into such a beautiful young woman and I can see so much of both Jason and Bennu in her. I envied her in a way, I envied that she was the actual daughter of him and I wasn’t; but, I never showed it or ever made her feel uncomfortable about it, I don’t think anyone really has a clue that I know I’m not Jason’s. “Hey! How have you been?” She greeted excitedly to me and I went straight to her for a hug.

“I’ve been good, and you?” I asked in return.

“Pretty good, I guess. The guys are driving me crazy like always,” she replied with a giggle and I gave one back with a sarcastic eye roll.

“Of course they are.. Where are those two anyway?”

“In the living room playing a game, which is surprising considering all they ever do is go out and drink.. It still boggles my mind on how they get it,” she replied and I let out an aggravated sigh.

“Those little..” I began, but stopped myself, “Whatever.. I’ll talk to them about that later..”

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“How’s your Mom?” I asked, giving a warm smile and wanting to get details before I saw my Dad.

Bahiti shrugged and sighed, though keeping a light smile, “She’s okay. She’s been with Dad all day, he didn’t go to work today. He hasn’t gone in a while, actually. I overheard them talking and I think Dad’s going to sell the bar,” she replied and my brows raised in curiosity. 

“Really..? Well, that’s good, right? That’s a good amount of money that’ll probably go towards your guys’ college educations. It’ll give him more time to be home, too.”

“Well, yeah.. But what’s the point of him being home if he’s just locked away in his room all day?” Bahiti asked in return and I suppose she had a point. But, despite him being home more and confining himself, they could all easily go to college anywhere they wanted, and I knew that’s what they all needed.

“Maybe he needs more time at home, maybe then he’ll come out of his room more often. Maybe he just wants to be home.. You’ll love college, too, I know you’ll do well,” I replied and she smiled, soon nodding in agreement.

“Which reminds me, I still have homework to do. Welcome home, Luce,” she said joyfully, smiling wide and I nodded in thanks as she ran up the stairs to her bedroom.

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Without me even needing to go to the living room to see the boys, they walked out from it and Gareth waved to me as Gibson followed him, “Hey, Lucy!” Gareth said happily and I smiled.

“Hey guys, how’s school going?”

“Good, though I noticed you forgot to bring someone with you,” Gareth replied, referring to Cara from our phone conversation earlier.

“Yeah, what’s wrong with you, Luce?” Gibson added and I scoffed.

“You two are so pathetic. Whatever happened to you guys going out and just having fun rather than just looking for tail?” I asked in a teasing tone.

“Searching for tail is fun, Luce. Sorry we’re not in serious relationships like you and Lewis,” Gareth rebutted and I didn’t want to argue with the subject anymore. As much as they were responsible young men sometimes, the childish nature always came back every now and then and they were horny little teenagers all over again with a one track mind.

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“Anywayyssss..” I stressed, “How’s Dad?” I asked, already getting one opinion, yet wanting everyone’s.

“Who knows..” Gibson replied softly.

“Exactly.. Who the fuck knows,” Gareth added, “He talks to everyone but us, really.. I feel like he’s been avoiding us for a long time. I don’t know what’s up his ass.. I seriously think I heard him talking to himself again a few days ago, too. What the hell’s going on with him?” He asked.

“I.. I don’t know.. I’m sure he’s not avoiding you guys. He probably is just realizing that we’re all growing up now and we’ll be leaving soon. He might just not want to face it.”

“And that makes him feel the need to talk to himself instead of us?” Gibson asked, unconvinced by my reasoning and I sighed softly.

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“Listen.. Dad’s had a hard life, okay? He had me when he was your guys’ age. He was going to college and supporting my mom with me and then you two came while he was still in college. My mom died, your guy’s mom died.. Those are two people he’s been close with and had children with. Then Bahiti came along with Bennu.. He’s had a lot going on his in life ever since he was little, too.. Now he has that bar to stress over and all of his kids are almost to the age where they’re going to be leaving and moving out. He’s probably worried, too, that he’s never going to see any of us again for whatever reason. That would make anyone act a little weird.. Don’t you think?” I replied and neither of the boys said anything then. “He’s not ignoring anyone.. He’s probably just trying to cope with everything now so it all doesn’t happen out of nowhere all at once. I plan on moving out after I graduate. You guys and Bahiti are all the same age pretty much and you all are probably going to move out around the same time, too.. It’s a family of 6 being cut down to 2 just like that. Just give Dad some space, whatever he needs. He’ll come around, I’m sure,” I finished and Gibson nodded in understanding as Gareth looked to him and shrugged.

“Whatever you say, Luce,” Gareth replied.

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“Well, it’s good to have you home, Lucy.. Maybe you can get through to him since we can’t,” Gibson added with a brief smirk, turning around then and going back to the living room and Gareth followed behind him. 

“What the hell is going on with you, Dad..?” I asked myself quietly aloud, watching the boys leave the foyer. I looked up to Dad’s bedroom door upstairs from where I was and grew a little nervous again, trying to find things to say to him and ask him but in ways that I won’t make him upset. I didn’t acknowledge the boys when they mentioned hearing Dad talking to himself in his room because I had heard it too before, but I never wanted to admit it to myself. It’s one thing to talk to yourself when doing a task or trying to figure where you left your keys, but it’s another thing to get angry. I came home early one time to surprise them but only Dad was home and I know I heard him arguing with someone, yet when I walked into his room, he was alone and his phone wasn’t even on him. I’ve been wanting to figure out for a while now who’s he been talking to and I haven’t told anyone else, but I think everyone might feel the same way and aren’t saying anything just like I’m not.

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Before I reached his bedroom door, I could hear Bennu talking to my Dad inside of their room, but before I could make out anything they were discussing, the door opened and Bennu walked out. I smiled when I saw her and she smiled warmly in return, walking towards one another and we hugged briefly, “It’s good to see you, Lucy, how has school been?” Bennu wondered as she let me go.

“It’s going really well, actually. I’m excited to be graduating soon,” I replied and she nodded.

“How’s Lewis? You two are still together, yes?” She asked next and I could feel my cheeks getting a little flushed.

“Yeah, we’re doing good, too..” I replied with a smile, “How are you and Dad?” I asked and I noticed the excitement in her eyes begin to lessen.

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“We’re.. Okay. It’s hard to get him out of the house or even spend a little time with him outside of the bedroom, he’s not telling me something and it’s beginning to worry me,” she answered.

“Bennu, I’m sure he’s okay.. I feel like he might be acting like this because almost all of us are grown up and ready to move out and do things for ourselves. I told the boys the same thing. Dad just doesn’t want to face the facts. He’s going to miss us a lot, but he’ll still always have you by his side, so know that I’m sure whatever he’s trying to deal with, it has nothing to do with you,” I tried to comfort her but she kept her worried expression.

“I just.. Don’t really know what to do anymore, Lucy.. He’s gotten more secretive and quiet around us, around me, too. He hasn’t been going to work at all really, I’m scared to ask him about it,” she continued.

“Scared? Why..?”

She held her tongue for a moment, trying to find the words, “I haven’t had a decent, normal conversation with your father in a while. I don’t know what’s going on with him anymore, and when I ask, he gets angry.. I find him getting harder and harder to deal with.”

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“Bennu.. Has he ever, umm.. Hurt you?” I asked, seeing her eyes widen a little.

“Oh, no, no.. He’s not violent now. I guess I’m more so worried if he will become that way if this keeps up,” she replied and I was a little shocked. “Sometimes his anger can get the best of him.. That’s usually when I give up and give him space. I hate fighting with him,” she continued.

“Yeah.. He can be a little overwhelming when he’s angry.. But, what do you think he’s angry about?” I asked, seeing her think for a moment and she soon shook her head.

“Honestly, I don’t know.”

“Have you ever heard him, um.. Talk to himself?” I wondered.

“A few times, yes. But I just assumed he was thinking out loud. Go see him, Lucy.. Maybe you can get him out of this weird funk he’s been in for a while,” Bennu suggested and I nodded in agreement. “I’ll be right downstairs if you need anything.. Welcome home, dear,” she continued and I smirked, nodding in thanks and she walked passed me and downstairs.

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I walked towards their bedroom door and already I could hear my Dad talking to himself which only worried me more. He seemed to only do it when he was alone and I noticed he tries to hide it from all of us, but I wanted to know why. I put my ear closer to the door and his voice was muffled, I couldn’t make out the words he was saying, but it sounded like he was arguing with someone.. Was he on the phone? I was a little nervous to knock or even see him at all because of the things that everyone’s been saying, but at the same time, him seeing me might make things better.. At least I hope it will.

________________________________________________

Jason’s POV

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Lucy’s coming home today from college to spend the weekend with us and then going straight back to take her finals before she graduates. I couldn’t be more proud of her. Although I hated her going to the same school I went to, she has been doing very well and I’m glad that I didn’t take her out of there and make her go to a different school. I’ve been having a hard time ever since Lucy went to college, the boys and Bahiti have barely been home as well since they like to go out a lot by themselves or with friends. I’m beginning to worry a little because Lucy was supposed to be here an hour ago and she usually isn’t late, but I don’t want to call her and be a bother. But, it’s not like I can even focus clearly about that anyways with my father always glaring at me. I can feel his eyes on the back of my head and it’s becoming a problem that I’ve been trying to keep under control for a few years now. There isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t see or hear from him at least once.

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“I don’t know what the hell you’re trying to accomplish by telling me stuff like this.. Why can’t you just leave? Never come back? I thought I was done with you the day you blew up the house. I was ready for you to be gone, yet here you are, continuing to make my life miserable..” I was so sick of my father constantly being with me, it was driving me nuts. 

“I can feel your frustration..”

“Wow, you think? I’m laying it on pretty fuckin’ thick here,” I rebutted.

“If you would just do as I ask, like a good son, then you wouldn’t have to worry about anything anymore,” he replied and I turned around to face him.

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“You’ve got to be joking, right? You’re one sick, twisted person, you know that? I don’t even know why I fucking talk to you.”

“That’s really what you believe? That I’m the twisted one? How many times do I have to repeat myself, Jason, before you finally figure it out..?”

“What the hell are you talking about? All that you’ve been doing is telling me to leave my family, or worse, off them like you did Mom! Why the hell would I do that? Why did you do it!?” I had to have asked that question a million times now to him, yet he still never gives me a straight answer, he always dances around the truth just to piss me off.

“You’ve read the newspapers.. You’ve watched the news channels. Bodies keep piling up higher and higher and you’re too ignorant to realize who’s doing it.”

“I..” I stopped, taking a deep breath and letting it out slowly, “The boys aren’t responsible for all of them. I’ve been keeping track, reading and watching the news, you’re right.. But, not every missing person or body found is them, I know it.”

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“So, instead of stopping them like you should, you’re ignoring it. Even though all of them may not be a kill under the boys’ belts, that doesn’t disregard the fact that they already have killed. It doesn’t matter if they’re done, or have stopped, what matters is that they’ve already done it. Get rid of them, Jason. You know it’s for everyone’s benefit,” my Dad replied and I let out a scoff.

“I’m not doing a damn thing to them.” I stated strongly.

“You’re still no better than they are. You have a kill under your belt, as well.. Or have you forgotten about Lana?” The moment he mentioned her name, my chest felt as if it was caving in and it was a little hard to breath. “How about you just get rid of the threats? Gareth and Gibson need to realize that the things they’ve done is unacceptable, and so do you. Kill them before they have any time to reproduce, then off yourself. Do the whole world a favor and get rid of this family name once and for all!” His voice raised a little and my blood was beginning to boil with rage, yet a knock at the door made my nerves outweigh the anger.

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I looked towards the door and watched it open slowly, seeing Lucy walk in and shut the door behind her. I felt as if I had been saved from the conversation with my father and I was grateful that she came when she did. “Lucy..” I said softly, my lips beginning to smile and she seemed happy to see me, though I could tell there was something bothering her.

“Hi, Dad.” She replied, both of us walking towards one another and I hugged her tightly, holding her for a few long seconds. I was overjoyed to see her, she was the only person that could change my mood entirely and help me think clearly. Perfect timing, too. “Where you on the phone with someone a minute ago?” She asked and I froze a little, releasing her from the hug and eventually nodding.

“Uh.. Yeah, I was talking to a buyer.. I’m thinking about selling the bar,” I replied. I lied to her about who I was talking to, but I wasn’t lying about selling the bar.

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“Oh, well that’s exciting, right? Are you glad to be selling it so you’ll be home more?” She asked and I nodded again.

“Yeah, it definitely is. I’ll be home more and have more money to give you all whatever you need. But, we can talk about that later.. How’s school going? How’s that boyfriend of yours..?” I asked.

“You know his name, Dad.. It’s Lewis, and yeah, we’re doing pretty good. School is fine, too. I can’t wait to be done with it.” She replied and I smiled while nodding, but my smile faded as I continued to observe her face. There was something bothering her and I wanted to know what it was.

“Are you sure you’re doing okay? You look.. Bothered by something,” I asked, concerned that she was holding something back from me.

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Lucy grew quiet and she hesitated, but she was a very opinionated young woman and I knew that she would say whatever she needed to when she was ready. I waited for a few long seconds and Lucy finally decided to speak up. “Dad.. I don’t know what’s been going on with you, but whatever it is needs to stop. Gareth and Gibson, Bahiti, Bennu, we’re all worried about you. Why have you been locking yourself away in here? Why are you suddenly ignoring your own family? ..Why do you talk to yourself?” She finally asked and her last question is the only one I really paid attention to. 

“W-What? Where are you getting these ideas?” I asked, getting a little irritated already by this conversation that I most definitely didn’t want to have.

“Dad, don’t play dumb. Everyone on at least one occasion has heard you and we know you’re not on the phone.. Who are you talking to? Why?”

“That’s enough, Lucille. I’m not crazy. I don’t talk to myself.” I stated harshly.

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“Then what the hell is your problem?!” She raised her voice.

“You watch your mouth, Luce,” I warned, yet she continued.

“No, no more of this! What is wrong with you? You can’t just hide up here and hope we won’t figure anything out! The boys think you’re ignoring them! Same with Bahiti! Even Bennu thinks you need help! Just do us all a favor and talk to us more.. We’re worried, that’s all.. If you need someone to talk to, there’s all of us, not just yourself. Whatever’s the cause of this, you don’t need to be dealing with it by yourself..” She argued in return and I heard my father chuckle.

“She has a point. Though I don’t think it’s wise to tell her your plan,” he added and I looked towards him for a brief second.

“I don’t have a plan!” I replied to him, though I didn’t mean to.

“What? What does that mean?” Lucy asked and I sighed heavily, looking over to my father once more for a split second, “Who the hell are you looking at?”

“Nothing, no one! I just.. I don’t have a plan for anything that’s going on. There is no motive, I’m not ignoring anyone! Now drop it, Lucy.” I warned once more, though I knew Lana’s stubbornness ran through her veins and she wasn’t done yet.

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“I want you to get help, Dad! I want you to go see Grandma again. You saw her when you were a kid, right? You got help before,” Lucy pressed and my eyes widened in slight shock.

“Things like that are supposed to be confidential,” I replied, but Lucy continued.

“I asked Grandma how you and Mom met, how she knew who you were.. She didn’t tell me about any of your sessions with her, just that you had seen her before and you and Mom became close after you started seeing Grandma.. Can I ask why you went there for help in the first place? Please?” She tried to pry, but I was in no mood to tell her why I went to a psychiatrist.. I haven’t talked to Lana’s mother in ages, I didn’t even know she was still alive.

“No, you can’t ask that. My mother made me go, and I went to make her happy. That’s it.”

“Dad, that’s not it..” Lucy continued.

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“Man, she can read you pretty damn well without even being blood,” my father butted in with a slightly impressed tone and I turned away from the both of them, not wanting to have any part of this conversation anymore.

“This discussion is over. Go to bed, Lucy, get some rest,” I suggested strongly, unable to look at her still, knowing that her expression would bother me.

“But, Dad, plea-”

“Lucille..” I said her name sternly, stopping her from continuing more and I heard her let out a sigh of defeat.

“Goodnight..” She said just above a whisper, but I didn’t reply as I listened to her leave my room.

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“Well.. That was entertaining,” my father continued.

“Shut up.” I hissed, though I knew he wouldn’t listen.

“Maybe you should go back to the psychiatrist. Maybe she’ll be able to knock some sense into you and get you to do what’s right.”

“Do you even listen to yourself?” I asked, “These are your grandchildren.. My children. I’m not going to make the same choices you did. I’m a better father than you ever were and I don’t plan to let that change,” I concluded, hearing him let out a chuckle to my words. “Is there something you find funny?” I asked with frustration.

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“Well, yes. Look at you. You’re a mess. You don’t even realize that the path you’re already going down isn’t going to be an easy one. You’re deteriorating. Losing it. You’re trying so hard to ignore what you are that now everything you don’t want to happen is going to. If you ask me, that is pretty amusing,” he replied. What does he know? Nothing is going to go wrong, I’m not going to harm my boys let alone anyone else in the family. As much as I hated to admit it, Mrs.Hughes did help me a little when I was younger, but I stopped going to her after I met her daughter, Lana, which was then the new person that listened to my troubles and worries. I stopped seeing Mrs.Hughes and as the years went by, things did end up getting worse and worse; now things are worse than ever. My mind is telling me to do unimaginable things.. When I look at the boys when they’re swimming in our pool, I have the urge to hold their heads under water. Thoughts of cutting their throats while making dinner in the kitchen is the reason why I stopped going in there. What’s strange is that I don’t have these thoughts for Bennu or my girls, just the twins. Lucy was right, I have been avoiding the boys, but avoiding them is the best thing I can do right now as I fight the strange, horrific urges I have when I see them doing anything. I hate that I can’t look at them without wanting to dig my thumbs into their eyes, and the thing that kills me the most is why in the hell do I have these thoughts and urges. Maybe my father is right about one thing, maybe I should just off myself, that way I won’t have to worry about acting on my ideas and I can finally be rid of the torment he causes. Maybe I should just give up?

Generation 2, Chapter 18

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I haven’t been to the graveyard in a long time, I didn’t have a reason to come here anymore; my Father followed me around everywhere I went and even if I did go to the cemetery, it’s not like anything else would change.. I still wouldn’t see my Mother. But, it felt so weird being here now, seeing the freshly dug grave of my buried ex-girlfriend and Mother to my twins no more than one hundred feet from where I sat.

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Not many were here; Hitomi and her daughter Helena, Gareth and Gibson, Lucy, Anya, and Faline’s husband and their daughter Sherri. Faline’s parents and her brother were here earlier, but left before anyone else after Faline had been buried. None of them even bothered to make eye contact with me or the boy’s, they didn’t say a single word to us. Julia didn’t come along because she wasn’t very fond of Faline, Bennu and Bahiti waited at home, too, having no desire to be here for Faline either, but I don’t blame them.

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I looked to my sisters along with Lucy and Helena, seeing them with sad faces as they mourned my ex, some crying, some not. Helena had grown into such a beautiful young woman just like my gorgeous Lucy, looking at my daughter last out of the bunch and I could see her crying as Helena tried to console her. My adopted daughter of my long dead best friend was crying over a Mother that wasn’t even hers, and here I sat without a tear in my eye. I didn’t even know why.. It wasn’t remorse, I wasn’t unhappy per say, I wasn’t crying or even really all that sad.. I guess I was just indifferent and only here for the twins’ sake.. Gareth and Gibson were behind me by my mother and father’s graves and I sat alone on a bench that my father had sat on 8 years ago, the night I first saw him. 

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“Didn’t I warn you something like this would happen?” I jumped a little in fright as I heard my father’s voice ringing in my ear out of nowhere, looking over and seeing him standing in the grass, looking down at Faline’s grave where the last of the grievers stood that I failed to mention; Faline’s husband and daughter.. I didn’t reply, looking to them as well and soon my gaze went to the ground once more. “She was so pretty.. So young.. Is this catastrophic enough for you yet? That’s two on their list now.. Do you really think that she died from just falling down t-”

“Shut up.. Just, please.. Shut the fuck up for once.. The Mother of my son’s, my ex is dead and you really want to question that? Right now?”

“What? It’s not like you had even an ounce of care for her in your entire body..”

“You can’t just leave me alone.. Can you?” I asked.

“You ask such funny questions all the time.. I’m here because you need someone to talk to.. You can’t talk to your wife, your children, your sisters.. No one is here to listen but me,” he replied. I sat there in silence for a few more moments, not knowing what to say to him.

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“Your sisters..” He began again, my attention going to my father briefly and noticing he was looking at them with a small smirk on his lips.

“What about them..?” I wondered.

“Just.. Look at them..” He continued and I kept my eyes on my father instead, seeing his expression calmed, happy, content, admiring his daughters and I finally looked to them as he had requested.

“Yeah.. They’re all grown up.. What the fuck about it?”

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“Wow.. Hitomi has such a beautiful girl.. Anya looks just like Mom, doesn’t she?” He asked with a chuckle, looking to me with a smile and I scoffed.

“Shut up…”

“They’re all so pretty..” He continued.

“Yeah.. Don’t you wish you could tell them that yourself you fucking asshole?” I asked, looking to my father then with a smirk and he still kept his smile.

“It’s fun to see you try and torment someone. You’re only tormenting yourself,” he replied, but I was confused.

“What does that mean?”

“Again, with the funny questions.. Don’t you ever get tired of asking them?” He wondered with a smile and I turned away, losing my smirk instantly and focusing on the ground again.

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I sat there in a short silence, trying to ignore my father, but he still refused to go away, “Have they ever wondered about me?” He asked.

“Who..?”

“The boys.. They’re by your Mother and I’s graves.. Have they ever asked about us?” He repeated.

“Yeah, I told them that their Grandmother was a saint and that their Grandfather was someone they should never waste their time thinking about..” I replied, looking to my father then with another smirk and he was the one with the serious face this time.

“They should know their history.. Why are you depriving them?”

“Maybe because you’re nothing to be proud of..” I retaliated, looking to him with a serious expression filled with anger and he then smirked, mocking me almost. 

“Heads up..” He replied, nodding his head towards Faline’s grave and I looked to where he motioned, seeing Faline’s husband walking my direction, though his eyes were set on the boy’s behind me.

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I stood to my feet, ready to talk to him if he needed to but his eyes were filled with grief and hate as he continued to stare at my sons the closer he got. The expression he carried with him didn’t please me at all and it seemed as if he wanted to do something to the boy’s, so I stepped in front of him and stood like a brick wall, keeping him from going any further and he looked to me then, “I need to talk with Gareth..” He more so demanded than asked.

“Oh yeah? Why’s that?” I questioned.

“Jason.. If you were ever going to be a decent human being in your entire life, you’d let me go talk to him and get what I need to say off my chest,” he rebutted but I held my ground.

I chuckled a little, “You don’t know shit about me. Now tell me why you’re giving my sons the stink eye at their mother’s funeral,” I requested sternly, still not letting him pass me.

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“You know why.. That boy is nothing short of being the Devil himself and it makes me pity you on how you don’t see that,” he replied and a tingle went up my spine full of rage at his words.

You pitying me? That has to be the joke of the day..” I replied with a pathetic chuckle, seeing as how he was at his wife’s funeral claiming I was the one he pitied when really he should only feel sorry for himself and his daughter. The moment he implied an insult towards my son was when I knew for sure that he wasn’t just going to ‘talk’ to Gareth..

Let me pass or I swear I’ll-”

“You’ll what, exactly..?” I questioned, stepping up closer to him in an intimidating manner and he adjusted himself within his dark suit.

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“He..” Faline’s husband continued, yet stopped to gather his next words, “Gareth did this to Faline, I’m sure of it..” He continued, “I was downstairs, watching television with her and she went upstairs to get something.. I heard another voice, his voice.. The next thing I knew, she screamed and I watched her fall down the stairs myself.. I watched my wife die before my very eyes..” He struggled to say, tears forming in his eyes and I noticed his body begin to shake. “The noise.. The sound of her neck breaking on the way down the stairs will forever be in my mind and it’s all because your son did it.. It’s all his fault my wife is gone..” He replied with a dead serious tone and expression. I could tell he wasn’t going to stop trying to get passed me, but one thing was for sure, there was no way I would let him.

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You really want this to happen..? He just lost his mother.. What do you plan on doing exactly? Teach him a lesson as if he doesn’t already know how terrible he feels about her accident?” I asked, hearing him then chuckle to my words.

“Yeah.. Accident.. That’s exactly what it was..” He replied sarcastically.

I was done with this arguing, this pathetic attempt on blaming my boy for Faline’s death and I waited for an opportunity to put him into his place and get him to walk away. “Hey, whatever you were going to do or say to him, how about you say and do to me instead? I’ll be sure to give him the message” I offered an ultimatum.

“No.. Now let me by, Jason..” He refused.

“What is it? Are you going to beat up a little kid? Tell him that he’s the Devil in disguise? Tell him lies like Faline never loved him just to make him feel more like shit? Just get out of here, asshole.. You’re not getting any closer to my son and I guarantee this is the last you’ll see of him,” I threatened and I watched his face grow in rage.

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“Do you know what I see when I look at him?” He asked me and I shrugged.

“I don’t give a shit what you see,” I replied but he continued anyway.

“I see a soulless, evil, conniving boy that got away with murder and I want to teach him a lesson for killing his own Mother.. My wife.. The Mother of my daughter!” He replied and I clenched my fists in anger.

“You want to teach my son a lesson? I would absolutely love to see you try,” I somewhat threatened.

“He’s like a miniature version of you, only more hollow and pathetic inside. What’s that old saying? ..Like Father, like Son?”

“Keep talking, bud, and I promise you’ll find yourself six feet under just as your precious wife is,” I threatened more and his eyes widened in both horror and rage.

“You piece of shit!” He called out and took a swing at me, though I expected it coming and I moved my body back and out of the way of his fist. 

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I swung back, hitting him straight in the jaw as hard as I could and I watched him fall to the ground before me. I climbed on top of him and shoved my fist into his face again and again, making sure he would regret ever talking ill of my son and I could hear voices around me, though I couldn’t make out what they were saying; all I wanted to do was see this man pay for what he had said and make sure that he would never so much as think to come near my boy again.

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I felt the strength of Anya and Hitomi, pulling me off of him with all of their strength and my sisters voices soon entered my ears, yelling at me to stop. Hitomi and Anya held me back as Faline’s husband stood to his feet and I yelled out threats as he staggered away from me, bleeding from his nose and lip, “Is this how you imagined spending your wife’s funeral!? Huh!? Taking out your grief on my boy, you fucking piece of shit!? If you ever talk about my son like that again I’ll fucking kill you, do you understand me!?” I yelled, trying to break free from Anya and Hitomi but they refused to let me go as I watched Faline’s husband walking away from me quickly.

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Faline’s husband and daughter went passed the gates and left, I then jerked myself from Hitomi and Anya’s grip, “Get the fuck off me!” I demanded, feeling them release my arms and I could feel how hot and enraged my body was from what just happened. 

“Jason.. Don’t you think that was a little inappropriate timing?” Anya wondered.

“What the hell is up with you? He just lost his wife.. Calm down, alright?” Hitomi tried to compromise and I shook my head.

“Just leave me alone.. Thanks for coming, but just go home now,” I more so demanded, walking towards the twin’s who were looking to me in shock by my parents graves, ignoring everyone else that was there.

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I went to the boys and looked to their faces, noticing Gibson was more worried than Gareth was. “Dad.. Are you okay?” He wondered. I looked to his emerald eyes for a moment and tried to calm my still quickened, anger filled breaths. 

“Yeah.. I’m fine, son..” I encouraged, placing my hand on top of his head and tousling his hair gently. Never did I think that Faline’s husband would try and start trouble with me or the boy’s at her funeral, I imagined him too weak to move and grieving too much to even come up with the conclusions that he did. What if I had decided not to come? What would he have said to Gareth? ..Would he have done anything to him..? I felt my heart beat beginning to race again at the thought of him hurting one of my boys, but I tried to put it passed me, more than happy that I had decided to come with Gareth and Gibson now knowing that Faline’s husband might’ve done something drastic. I was glad I was here to protect them. 

“That was awesome,” Gareth said with enthusiasm, a smile on his lips when I looked to him and I chuckled lightly.

“No, it was wasn’t.. Forget what you just saw,” I replied, looking down at my pants and noticing the they had scuffs in the knees, “Dammit.. These pants are ruined now,” I let out softly, sighing and looking back to the boys.

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“Dad!” Lucy called out behind me and I sighed even heavier this time, knowing she wasn’t going to like what she had just witnessed me doing. I turned around and I could see in Lucy’s face how bothered she felt, “What the hell was that?” She asked.

“Nothing, baby girl.. I’m sorry, I just.. Lost my temper with him,” I tried to reason and calm her, but she refused; she was furious with me and it was written all over her face.

“What did he even say for you to do something like that? Faline loved that man and you got into a fight with him at her funeral for Christ sakes!” She spat back.

“Luce.. It’s a long story, I’ll explain to you later,” I replied, giving a glance back at the twins, trying to let her know I didn’t want to discuss it in front of them and Lucy let out an aggravated sigh, though catching my drift.

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“Are you coming home for dinner?” I asked next, seeing her expression still holding a grudge against me and it made me regret everything that had happened with Faline’s husband.

Lucy shook her head, “I already talked to Aunt Hitomi and she said I could sleep over. Helena’s going to stay home with me tomorrow, I don’t want to go back to school yet..” She made fact without even asking me, but I decided not to contest it.

“Oh.. Yeah, I guess that’s okay.. Are you headed over there now?”

“Helena and I are going to go and hangout somewhere, then go back to Aunt Hitomi’s.”

“All right.. Will you call me tomorrow? Let me know how you’re doing?” I requested, Lucy pausing a moment before answering.

“Yeah, whatever, Dad..” She replied, not convincing me at all and she looked towards the twins, “Bye, guys..” She said softly, turning around then and leaving the cemetery.

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The boys said bye to Lucy and I looked to them after she was out of our sights, “I bet Bennu is making dinner, are you two ready to head back now?” I wondered.

“Yeah, I’m hungry,” Gareth replied, yet Gibson didn’t say anything.

“Hey, why don’t you go wait in the car, bud? We’ll be right there,” I said to Gareth and he nodded, handing him the keys to my car and he left Gibson and I alone.

I looked to Gibson who’s expression was sad and unsure, furrowing my brows in worry and I knelt down in front of him, “Hey.. What is it?” I asked, seeing Gibson look to the grass before he looked back up to me.

“I just..” He stopped, looking to the ground again, “I miss Mom.. I just never thought anything like this would happen, or could happen.. Why does she have to be gone?” He asked, the moon showing a small glint in his eyes as they began to tear up a little.

“Hey, hey.. It’s okay. Accidents happen like this all the time. Why it had to happen to your Mother, I don’t know.. But, just remember that she’s in a better place now,” I replied.

“A better place than with us?” He questioned after, sighing under my breath and realizing that that might’ve not have been the best thing to say, but I didn’t know what else to tell him.

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“Listen Gibs.. No place is better for her than to be with you guys, but she can’t now. The next best thing is in heaven, right?” I asked.

“What if I don’t believe in that kind of thing?”

“Well.. Even if you don’t believe it, that’s where she is. She misses you guys just as much, but she’s happy still, I’m sure of it.. Your grief will pass, but she’ll always be with you,” I replied, still trying to cheer him up, and for how bad I thought I was doing, he seemed to become more understanding.

“Are Grandma and Grandpa with you?” He asked, looking to me with curiosity and I let out another sigh.

“Yup, they sure are..” I replied, seeing him smirk softly and I bent down after standing, hugging Gibson and he returned it, “Believe me when I say things will get better, okay buddy?” I continued.

“Okay,” he replied, releasing me from the hug and I tousled his blonde hair, putting my hand to his shoulder then and leading him out of the cemetery to head home.

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The car ride home was quiet.. Gareth played a game on his phone, laying in the back seat while Gibson rest his head against his window next to me in the passenger seat, staring blankly out it as we drove through the city to get home. I glanced in his direction a few times while driving, seeing his expression the same almost the entire time. I pulled out my phone, tapping his leg with it and he looked to me as if confused at first, taking the phone and looking to me questionably, “Text Bennu and tell her we’re on our way home, okay?” I asked and he nodded, doing as I had asked.

“She already sent you something, want me to read it?” He wondered and I nodded, waiting as he read the message, “Uh oh.. She wants to know why you got into a fight,” he said quietly and I let out an irritated sigh.

“Dammit, Lucy..” I said under my breath, knowing already that she had told Bennu, “Just ignore it, I’ll talk to her when we get home.. Tell her we’re almost there,” I replied and he nodded. Great, now I have to explain to her what had happened and I was in no mood to explain anything, I just wanted to go home, eat dinner and sleep after this long day.

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The boys hopped out of the car before me and I followed, “Go straight upstairs and wash up for dinner.. You can change out of those clothes, too, if you want,” I told them after they walked into the house.

“Thank Godddd,” Gareth wined, glad that he could get out of the proper and formal attire he wasn’t used to nor very fond of in the first place. The boys went up to their room and I took in a huge whiff through my nose, smelling Bennu’s cooking coming from the kitchen that now filled the entire house. It smelled of her famous Egyptian Shawarma dish and I could also smell a pumpkin pie that had been made, the smells getting stronger as I made my way towards the kitchen and saw Bennu by the sink. 

I let out a soft sigh, preparing for whatever she was going to say, “We’re home,” I spoke softly, seeing her dry off her hands then and turn to look at me.

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Bennu stepped up closer, “How are the boy’s doing? And Lucy?” She wondered, surprising me a little on how she didn’t mention the fight yet.

“They seem to be doing pretty okay.. How are you and Bahiti?” I wondered.

“We’re fine..” She paused, her eyes looking down to my tie briefly and letting out a sigh, “Why did you hit that man?” She finally asked, “Lucy called to tell me she wasn’t going to be home for dinner and she was already crying though that didn’t surprise me, but she was more than upset about the funeral.. She was upset about you.. So, why?” She continued, making eye contact with me again and worry was written on her face.

“The guy just wasn’t hittin’ the right buttons, he didn’t know when to shut his mouth, so I did it for him,” I replied.

“Jazon.. You are a grown man, what are you trying to teach the boy’s by acting like that?”

“Bennu, you should’ve heard the things he was saying to me, I couldn’t take it anymore.. I’m sorry I let it get out of hand, but I wasn’t going to just let him get away with what he was saying,” I answered, letting out a heavy sigh and I watched as her gaze fell to the floor. “What’s wrong?” I asked.

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“You don’t.. You didn’t still have feelings for her, did you? Were you jealous of that man?” She asked, my jaw dropping a little in surprise and I wasn’t expecting that question.

“Bennu, no.. Of course not. Is that why you’re so upset about this?” I asked and she paused a moment, then nodding as she looked up to me. I was warmed by the thought of her being jealous, I had always liked when women would get jealous of others that were involved with me, but Bennu never has anything worry about. I stepped up closer to her and cupped her cheek within my palm, caressing her face with my thumb, “He was talking about Gareth.. He insulted him and me right to my face and I wasn’t going to stand for it, so I hit him.. Not because of Faline or because I was jealous of him,” I explained, “He should be more than jealous of me instead,” I cooed quietly with a flirtatious tone, seeing the tiniest smirk form on her lips.

“What did he say about Gareth?” She wondered, but I didn’t want to explain it all right now.

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“I’ll tell you later,” I assured her, continuing to caress her cheek with my thumb. Even through the homey and strong smells of freshly made food within the kitchen, her scent still managed to overpower it all and it made me fall hard for her each and every time. “Do you love me?” I asked, seeing her then smile and nod.

“Of course I do,” she replied and I smile in return.

“And I love you.. Don’t you ever forget that, got me?” I joked softly and she chuckled, pulling me into a long kiss that I more than welcomed and I wrapped my arms around her.

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Gareth, Gibson and Bahiti came downstairs from their rooms and we all sat for dinner, though it felt a little empty without Lucy there as I looked to the empty seat next to me where she usually sat; I imagined she was still out with Helena, probably eating at a diner somewhere that the two loved to do so much. Seeing how upset she was earlier made me want to go back and change the outcome of what had happened with Faline’s husband and I, but at the same time, I was proud of myself for sticking up for my boys; I wasn’t about to let him get away with the things he said just because his grief drove him to crazy assumptions. I felt he needed to blame her death on someone, and Gareth was it. I didn’t talk much through dinner and neither did Gibson, I mostly listened to everyone else’s conversations.. I wasn’t feeling very social right now for whatever reason.

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After dinner, the kids all went into the living room to play a video game together while Bennu cleaned up and I stayed with her for company. “So, vhat did that man say about Garth? Now knowing why you hit him, I probably would’ve hit him as well,” Bennu said as she washed the dishes.

“He, umm..” I began, checking over my shoulder and still seeing the kids in the living room, looking to Bennu again, “He actually called him the Devil.. He’s blaming him for her death,” I said with a chuckle following it, anger building up again a little, but I managed to stay calm. However, Bennu didn’t.

“Uck! The nerve of that man! Calling a sweet little boy such cruel things.. You should’ve gave him a new face,” she hissed and I chuckled again.

“Yeah, well.. I would’ve but my sisters pulled me off of him before I could,” I replied, hearing her ‘hmph’ under her breath.

“Is he all right? Did he hear anything he said to you?” She asked, looking to me after the dishes were done and I shrugged.

“I don’t think so.. He didn’t act like he did, nor did Gibson..”

“Well, that’s good at least.. I couldn’t imagine how he would feel if he had,” she replied, letting out a soft sigh.

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“Don’t let it bother you.. Come here,” I requested, seeing her smile and walk up to me. I turned her around and let my hands run up and down her torso slowly, feeling her lean back against me and shut her eyes in a relaxed manner.

“Mmm.. Let’s just go upstairs to the bedroom and not come out for days,” she said quietly, her tone filled with ecstasy as my hands rubbed softly just under her chest.

“Sounds like a plan to me,” I replied, chuckling as I leaned down and kissed her neck. She continued to let out soft moans in pleasure, my hands then continuing upward and they ran up to her breasts, though before I would indulge on her body and make her ache for me, a noise rang in our ears and it was the sound of the front gate being buzzed. “Fuckin’ figures..” I said with a groan following it and Bennu joins me in letting out a displeased moan.

“Make them go away,” she said with a wanting tone, giggling after and I smirked, kissing her neck again.

“I’ll be back in no time,” I replied, feeling her leave my grip and I hopped off the counter, heading towards the door and already hating whoever was there for cock blocking me from my own wife.

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I got to the front door and pressed the button to talk, “Yeah?” I asked, wanting to make this quick so Bennu and I could retreat upstairs for some much needed time alone.

“Hello, Mr. Duboys.. This is Detective Grander from the Bridgeport Police Department, you may remember me from some years ago?” A man replied and I tried to think back.. Oh.. Shit. It was the detective that came by after Lana had died.. Or rather, been killed by me. I paused a moment, then held my finger on the talk button.

“Um.. Can I help you with something?”

“Well, if you wouldn’t mind letting me in, that would be great.. It’s getting rather cold out at nights now,” he replied with a chuckle. I hesitated once again, but soon pressed the button to unlock the gate and let him in; what could this be about..?

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I grew a little nervous, wanting to know what the detective could be doing here at this time of night and for what reason. I opened the door for him and he came in, shivering a little, “Man.. You can sure tell winter’s coming,” he joked and I smirked, though I lost it just as fast as it had been formed.

“So, what brings you over on such a night?” I wondered, looking to him curiously.

“Straight to the point then, huh? All right.. Well, to be honest, I’m investigating the cause of death for Faline Hubbard, married now with the name Faline Ruttin.. I assume you know her, seeing as she was the mother of your twin boys, am I right?” He replied and I furrowed my brow in confusion.

“Yeah.. Knew her.. I still don’t understand why you’re here in my house, though,” I answered, seeing his face turn a little more serious now.

“Well, as you know, the autopsy shows that she broke her neck when she fell, which is what killed her.. But I’m just trying to put the pieces together on why she fell.. That’s all.. If it’s not too much to ask, I’d like to ask your son a couple of routine questions..?” He wondered, my expression then turning a little sour.

“Who?”

“Gareth. I’ve already recieved a statement from Faline’s husband and their daughter, Sherri.. I understand though that Sherri and Gibson were in bed sleeping when it all happened, so I would just like to ask Gareth if he happened to’ve seen what happened. Just a few minor questions, Jason, and I’m out of your hair,” he encouraged. I didn’t like where this was going, I could tell that he was lying to me, but I couldn’t figure out what was a lie and what was truth. I thought for a moment, then looked to the detective and nodded.

“Okay.. He’s in the living room,” I agreed, telling myself there was nothing to worry about, but I couldn’t help in feeling a little nervous about all of this.

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I escorted Detective Grander towards the living room, walking in through the open doorway and the loud game along with their laughter and harmless bickering filled our ears. I stopped by the doorway and the detective stopped behind me, “Gareth, come here a moment, will you?” I asked, seeing him ignore me for a few brief seconds and I asked once more, “Gareth.. Come over here,” I repeated.

“Dad, I’m winning! I’m right in the middle of th-”

Gareth.. Now,” I asserted more and I heard him let out an aggravated groan, putting his controller down and walking over to us.

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“Gareth, this is Detective Reed Grander, he just wants to ask you a few questions,” I introduced them and Gareth seemed to freeze a little after I had introduced them.

“Hey there, Gareth.. I just wanna get some information from you, that’s all.. I’m very sorry for your loss, you must be a little overwhelmed by today a little.. I understand it was your mother’s funeral..” The detective began, his tone filled with remorse.

“Uh.. Yeah.. It was a little hard,” Gareth replied, looking down to the floor briefly before looking back up to the detective.

“I can imagine you miss her a lot, huh?” He continued.

“Um, yeah.. I do,” Gareth answered, looking to me as if asking for help but I gave him a comforting expression back, letting him know it was okay and Grander continued.

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I understand you were awake when your mother, um.. Fell.. Am I correct?” He asked and I looked to him, wondering if this was the best time to be talking about this, but Gareth seemed to reply without it letting it overwhelm him.

“Yeah, I was.. I was using the bathroom,” he replied.

“The upstairs one, or the one downstairs?”

“Upstairs.. There was a door to it in the hallway and through Mom’s room, but none of us are allowed in there,” Gareth answered. 

“Did you ever hear your mother conversing with anyone? Did you talk to her at all when you went to or came out of the bathroom?”

“No.. I was in the bathroom and I heard her scream, so I came out and saw her at the bottom of the stairs.”

“Oh…” Grander answered with an unconvinced tone, causing me to grow a little more nervous, but he continued anyways.

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Sherri claims that you were at the top of the stairs when she came out of her room.”

“Yeah, I kinda just said that.” Gareth replied instantly; I couldn’t tell if he was telling the truth or just an amazing liar.

“I guess what I mean is, when she came out, she saw you and she remembers you saying the words ‘I didn’t mean to’, do you remember this?”

“I didn’t say anything like that.. I said ‘I don’t know what happened’.. She just probably got confused.”

“Ah.. I see.. Well, I suppose that’s all I need.. Thank you for your time, Gareth.. And again, I’m sorry for your loss,” Detective Grander replied and Gareth nodded, looking to me then.

“You can go now,” I confirmed his nonverbal question and he walked back over to the couches with his brother and sister.

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Is something the matter?” The detective wondered as I stared at my children.

“No.. It just.. Brings back bad memories of you being here the last time.”

“Well, my apologies then. I’m sure after this visit, you won’t see me for a while, of course unless you give me a reason to come back,” he joked, seeing him smile out of the corner of my eye and hearing him chuckle lightly. I joined him in the chuckle, but only to humor him.

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Bennu then joined us and cleared her throat, catching both of our attention and I smiled towards her, hearing a quiet whistle coming from Detective Grander’s lips that peeved me a little, but I was glad that his attention wasn’t on my boy anymore. “Sorry, this is my wife, Bennu.. Bennu, this is Detective Reed Grander from the Bridgeport Police Department,” I introduced them.

“Hi, it’s nice to meet you,” Bennu said with a smile.

“Pleasure is mine, I’m sure,” the detective answered with a smile, “Interesting accent, where are you from?”

“I moved here from Egypt a little under 15 years ago,” Bennu answered proudly, “Please, can I offer you anything? Perhaps a cup of coffee?” She asked and he nodded.

“That would be wonderful, thank you, Mrs. Dubois,” he replied, finally getting my last name right for once..

“Would you like some, baby?” She asked and I nodded.

“Yeah, thanks,” I replied, watching as she then smiled towards me and walked to the kitchen, the detective accompanying her as I hung back a moment.

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I hung back and stood near the doorway like I had been, looking over to the couches where my children were and my eyes went fixed on Gareth. I didn’t know what to think anymore.. Accidents happen like this all the time, but for some reason this whole situation just wasn’t sitting right. What am I doing? I couldn’t tell if I believed my son or believed what the voice in my gut was telling me.. Was I in complete denial of what my son was capable of doing? He was so young, too young to be doing things like this to other people, whether he cared for them or not. 

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I joined Bennu and the detective in the kitchen who were already enjoying the coffee that was made, seeing my cup in a spot next to Bennu and I joined them, trying to shake off everything I was just thinking and composing myself. 

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So, what brings you to our home tonight, Detective?” Bennu wondered, taking a sip of her coffee.

“Oh, I just needed to ask Gareth a few questions.. Just tying up a few loose ends, that’s all..” He replied and I took a nervous sip of my coffee.

“Well, have they been tied up?” She asked.

“Not yet,” he replied, giving a quick glance over at Bennu that I assumed he thought I wouldn’t notice, continuing then, “But, it’ll he ruled an accident when I leave here.”

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Just curious..” I decided to add something in, “What would compel someone to think a child would be capable of doing something like this, let alone to his own mother?” I wondered.

“Well, you’d be surprised to know that kids are just as capable of killing as much as adults are, but.. Given the grief he seems to show, even despite him playing his video games happily.. Mentioning his mother seemed to make him get very reserved and a little hurt by what we were discussing, as it should’ve.. If he was involved in any way, he would’ve most likely acted different. Playing video games is a good way to ignore, or even cope with loss, too.”

“And if he had showed any other signs than that?” I asked.

“Let’s just be glad we don’t need to be discussing that matter right now,” he replied, giving me a slightly comforting smirk and I nodded.

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After finishing his cup of coffee with us and staying a little bit longer than he had intended, he stood from his chair and smiled, “Well, thank you for the coffee, I should be getting home now, though”

“Yeah, thanks for coming by..” I replied.

“Sure, just doing my job,” he added, looking to Bennu then and keeping his smile, “It was lovely meeting you.”

“Likewise,” she replied. I stood up to walk him out, but he put his hands up, gesturing for me not to bother.

“Don’t worry, I can see myself out.. Good seeing you again, Jason.. Despite the circumstances,” he said with a genuine tone, yet he was slightly apologetic with it as well and we watched him leave.

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Bennu went upstairs to get ready for bed and I went to the living room to round up the kids and send them to bed as well, seeing them still playing the same racing game for the passed hour now. “Alright, time for bed, come on..” I announced, hearing them all groan and I let out a chuckle, “Come onnnn, turn it off.. It’ll be there when you get back from school tomorrow,” I encouraged, seeing them all then reluctantly get up and shut everything down. I followed them going to the stairs and watched as they all ascended up them, “Brush your teeth, change your clothes and all that.. Goodnight,” I added, watching the boys go to their room and Bahiti to hers. 

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I got to my room and noticed a single light on in the corner, then over to the bed where I saw Bennu lying down with her leg propped up. “You still awake?” I wondered, shutting the bedroom door behind me and I pulled off my suit jacket to toss it over the chair near me.

I heard Bennu let out a relaxed sigh, “Yes,” she answered softly, “Are you coming to bed now?” She wondered.

“Yeah, I’ll be there in a sec, I’m gunna shower really quick,” I replied, going to the bathroom as I removed my tie and began undoing my shirt.

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I took about a ten minute shower, though I spent even more time at the sink starring at myself. My father’s words were all that I could think about at the moment;

     “Is this catastrophic enough for you?”

          “That’s two on their list now..”

I hated how I was starting to think he was right, but even if he was, there was no way I could stop them the way he wants me to. I refused to stood down to his level and off my own children like he attempted. My children are my life, and my boys were not monsters; they’re the ones that will keep our legacy going, and I was going to change our name so our pasts would not be only know for bloodshed anymore. I convinced myself I’d be the beginning to a new, better, less violent generation of the Dubois name.. I hope I could pull it off.

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When I finally got out of the bathroom, I walked to the bed and crawled in, noticing Bennu had fallen asleep waiting for me. I propped myself up with one hand as the other found its way to the side of her face, running my fingertips down her cheek. I couldn’t imagine what was going through my fathers mind that one fateful night that compelled him to take such actions; from how I saw things, he was extremely controlling over us and my mother, yet I had never caught on once that he would one day be labeled a murder. As monotone, boring and strict as he was, he had always seemed to be in love with her.. I couldn’t imagine doing anything harmful to my wife as he had done to his.. Who would ever want to hurt the one they loved most in the world?

Generation 2, Chapter 16

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I can’t believe how fast time flies.. Eight years ago when Faline moved out was when my life finally started to get better and things didn’t seem so difficult anymore. The day she left, I couldn’t wait to get her out the door. We had been getting more on each others nerves and less involved with one another’s needs, but she didn’t have what I wanted. Ever since I met Bennu, I knew I wanted to be with her, I wanted to try, yet she did nothing but deny me because of her career, or job, whatever stripping can be labeled. But, then something amazing happened and she came to my office as jaw-dropping as ever and then the fourth best thing happened in my life; our daughter, Bahiti. Everything changed then, this was the sign I was waiting for from Bennu and to be honest, the moment she stepped through my office doors was when I knew deep down is that that would be what led to the demise of Faline and I. Bennu never asked me to leave Faline, nor did she give me any ultimatum, but she couldn’t be with me knowing I was with Faline and I felt as if I’d never be happy unless I was with Bennu; so, Faline was out of the picture, just like that.

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Faline and I talked less and less, but that’s a given; she hates me more than anything, but I could care less. She married someone a few years back and they had a kid together; I only know because Gareth won’t stop complaining about it. Gareth doesn’t like her husband, who’s name always escapes me, nor the idea of not getting much attention from her anymore, but it’s understandable at that age. No one wants to be forgotten about. He’s grow away from Faline, too, ever since we split up; he enjoys being around Gibson, Lucy and I more so than Faline, but, I’m not complaining. I love spending time with my children. Gibson has grown into a pretty happy kid, nothing really bothers him and he doesn’t let a lot get him down, or at least he doesn’t let it show. His vision has gotten a little worse and I had to get him glasses not too long ago; he takes after Faline way more than me, he does have her eyes, after all.

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Gareth, Gibson and Bahiti are all 12 now and Lucy just turned 16. Lucy’s grown into a beautiful young woman and it bothers me whenever I see boys her age googly-eyed over her, but I try my hardest not to get involved. She’s a strong, capable, determined girl, and I trust her judgment; she hardly gets into trouble, either.. Well, at least she’s never gotten caught doing anything bad that I had to hear about.. She’s growing up to be a lot like Lana as far as not taking shit from anyone, yet she’s nothing like her at the same time. It’s hard to describe, but either way, I’m proud of how she turned out despite everything she’s been through her whole life. We’re still as close as ever and we got through all of the bullshit together; she’s helped me get passed things more than she knows.

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The summer festival was in town and we all came together to have fun and let go a little. Things at the bar were going well; I got rid of my secretary, Miss Chu, a little after Faline and I had split up and hired an older woman in her 40’s who knew how to do the job better. I hired a manager for the bar so I could have more time at home with my family, someone who could watch it without me needing to be there the whole time and they could even help me with my work in the office should I ever need them to. All of the kids have been doing so well in school, working hard to keep their grades up and I decided they all deserved a treat and I’m letting them do whatever they want today. Gareth, Gibson and Bahiti wanted to come to the festival, Lucy wanted to stay home or even go out with her friends, but since three of the four wanted to do the same thing, I made it into a family day and made her come with us all. But, Lucy doesn’t seem to mind now since she ran into some of her friends at the festival and I let her go off to hang out with them; just so long as she stays at the festival..

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I heard quick footsteps approaching me and I looked to the source, seeing my pretty little Bahiti running towards me and I smiled. 

Daddy, look! I’ve won so many tickets!” She called out joyfully and I chuckled, checking out how much she had earned and I’d guess she was holding about 35 tickets.

“Wow, that’s great, baby. Where’s your mom at?” I wondered and she looked around.

“Hmm.. Last time I saw her she was skating, do you want me to find her?” She questioned, looking back to me with a warm smile.

“No, that’s alright.. I’ll find her eventually.”

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“Can I get a snow cone?” She questioned next excitedly and I smiled more.

You can’t buy one with your tickets?” I joked and Bahiti laughed.

No, Dad! I need monneeyyy,” she pleaded sweetly and I chuckled, shifting where I sat and I pulled out my wallet, handing her a twenty dollar bill and putting my wallet back into my back shorts pocket, “Awesome, thank you!” She added as she turned on her heel and ran off and I watched her, letting out a soft sigh.

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“She’s grown into quite the young lady, huh?” Asked a deeper, more intimidating voice than my own; my body quivering a little in discomfort. I didn’t respond, leaning forward angrily and trying to ignore the voice of my father. “She looks a lot like both you and Bennu.. Who do you think she’ll resemble more when she gets older?” He wondered, trying to make idle conversation and as much as it seemed genuine, his words always started out that way, yet he always eventually turned into the asshole I knew.

“Why the fuck are you wearing a suit? It’s 85 degrees outside,” I spat back, hating that he was still haunting me ever since I visited the cemetery 8 years ago. I saw my father from time to time throughout the years, but he had been coming back around more often now and I found it hard sometimes to get rid of him.

“Well, that’s a funny question,” he replied.

“Why,” I asked bluntly.

“Gareth seems happy, Gibson seems like a good boy,” he ignored my question.

“Don’t even taint them by looking at them,” I answered.

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“What are you going to do when Bahiti gets to be Lucy’s age?” He questioned curiously.

“What does that mean..”

“Well, Lucy obviously has filled out. She’s a beautiful young woman just waiting to be tainted by boys like you when you were that age.”

“Shut the fuck up,” I demanded. I refused to listen to his words and refused to think of my Lucy being described in such ways.

“What? She’s not yours, don’t get so worked up.” He replied. There it was, the negative thoughts and everything that I hated thinking about, all popping into my head now that my father had showed up. My body shook with anger, yet I shut my eyes and repeated to myself in my head that he wasn’t really there, but no matter how many times I thought it, I could still see him sitting next to me out of the corner of my eye.

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“You know..” He continued, making my skin crawl with rage even more, “Gareth is going to be quite the little handful, not like he isn’t already, but he’ll be.. Different. He’ll be like the both of us in no time.. Worse, maybe,” he continued, my vision going to Gareth as he had a water balloon fight with Gibson. I saw him smiling, laughing, enjoying the company of his brother playing with him and I in the background watching, yet, I noticed my father was right; I could see pain behind his eyes no matter what expression Gareth took and I wondered what my father knew about him that I didn’t.

“Don’t talk about him like you know him.. He’ll be fine. There’s nothing wrong with me and there won’t be anything wrong with him. You, on the other hand, I can’t vouch for,” I replied and I heard him chuckle lightly in amusement. 

“I’m not asking you to, I’m only telling you the truth. I’ve been telling you the same thing over and over again for the passed 8 years and you still refuse to believe it,” he replied, “Even the boys themselves have given you clues that something’s not right with them, why do you withdraw yourself whenever these signs are apparent?” He wondered.

My anger lessened as my curiosity grew, turning my attention towards my father slowly and as much as I hated looking at any part of him, we finally connected eyes and I watched him smirk, “It’s been a while since you’ve had enough balls to look at me,” he said softly in his deep tone and I sighed heavily. I was worried for Gareth and Gibson despite how much I tried to hide it. “Look, I’m the only one you know who understands this best, there’s no point in lying to yourself and telling yourself that your children aren’t weird in the head. They may not show it fully now, but whenever that time comes, it’ll be something catastrophic. What’s worse here is that they seem to feed off one another, a good and an evil duo, yet both of them have the same twitch in their brain that makes them want to do bad things,” he continued and I turned my attention back to the boys.

“Is there a point to what you’re saying?”

“What I’m saying, Jason, is that it’s already started. Two is worse than one, especially if the two work together,” he continued and I looked back over to him, raising a brow.

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“What are you talking about? They haven’t done anything ‘catastrophic’ yet and they won’t,” I added, getting angry again by his words.

“Do you recall about two winters ago when Bahiti had come home crying, her nose bleeding, her face pale, her body shaking from being white-washed in the snow and tormented by a boy after school? He had called her names, very terrible names, and he even said terrible things about you and Bennu, probably thanks to his gossiping parents,” my fists balled in anger, remembering how scared and helpless she felt when she had gotten home. I could care less what the parents from the school said about us, all I cared about was that my youngest was getting bullied and no one seemed to be doing anything about it. Bahiti didn’t want to go back to school for a whole week, she refused, and I stayed home with her a few of the days that Bennu couldn’t, watching movies together and I held her as she sobbed on and off from what she had been put through. 

“Yeah.. I remember.”

“So, then you remember the boy being in the paper about two weeks after what happened to Bahiti?” He continued and I shook my head ‘no’, “Oh, you must’ve skipped over that section somehow.. He went missing, his parents thought he was kidnapped. But, they found his body when the snow melted in spring, he was bludgeoned to death with a bat and he had been buried under the snow the whole time,” he added and I looked to him with a somewhat worried expression.

“What does this have to do with anything?” I asked, trying to see his point.

“He was a big kid.. No one found out who did it, yet by the trajectory in which the bat had hit his skull, they said that someone his size or even smaller did it. Another child,” he continued.

“So? What, are you implying that one of the boys did it?”

“No, I’m implying that both worked together in order to get the job done in defending their sister since one of them alone probably would’ve ended up the same way Bahiti did. It only makes sense to have a partner in crime when you can’t get it done by yourself.”

“Are you seriously trying to convince me that Gareth and Gibson killed that little boy when they were only 10?” I asked, my expression growing worried, yet I tried to keep my cool as to not cause a scene; it would only look like I’m arguing with myself, anyhow..

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I watched as my father looked to the boys, “I’m not trying anything, I can sense that you don’t not believe it.. I’m telling you that it’s already begun and there’s no stopping it now.. Well, unless you do something like I attempted, but I failed, and so might you,” he added and I caught him smiling towards Gareth.

“No, I would never do anything to hurt my family.. I don’t understand.. If all of that is true, how were they able to do it? How do they hide it?”

“Maybe they don’t know they did it. Maybe they do know but have a fine understanding of it to know it’s wrong, but they don’t care. Maybe they enjoyed it, maybe they didn’t feel like it was wrong because it felt right,” he continued.

“What felt right..? Defending their sister, or just killing him in general?” I questioned, joining my father in looking at the two boys.

“Only they know, ask them if you’d like.. See if they grow scared of you in thinking they’ll be punished, or see if they’re excited about it.”

“No, I can’t do that.. I can’t lump them into the same category as murderers.”

“Why? You’re one,” he threw back. Over the years that have passed, bits and pieces of the night that Lana died came back into my mind and I realized only about a year or two ago that I was the one that pushed her over the edge. I went through a little rough patch in my life when I had finally realized it, but I was able to get passed it quicker that I had imagined I would.

“And so are you,” I replied.

“Then who’s to rule out that they aren’t?”

“Just stop, Dad.. Please.. Just let me enjoy this day with my family. I’m getting tired of talking to you,” I requested, unable to handle the conversation anymore and he didn’t say anything for a few long seconds.

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I leaned forward again and took a moment to breathe, calming my mind and continuing to watch the boys. I didn’t know what to say.. When I looked at them, all’s I saw was two happy kids who have had a life with its up’s and down’s, but now that my father had opened my eyes a little more, I wasn’t sure what to think now when I looked at them. They looked so innocent. Gibson looked up to Gareth and Gareth has always looked out for his siblings, but it was still hard for me to believe that they could’ve done something so cruel already at such a young age.. Killing someone.. Gareth liked to pull his pranks and taunt his siblings, he was the one I had to punish the most out of all my children, but he’s never been that evil. Well, to my knowledge, at least..

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I stood from the bench, still watching the boys as I heard my father behind me, “Off to be with the family now?” He wondered.

“Yeah.. I’ve spent enough time just sitting here doing nothing,” I replied.

“You haven’t been doing nothing, you’ve been realizing and coming to terms with what happens to boys that are born in this family. It’s quite alright, you’ll come to understand it better soon.”

“I understand it just fine.. We’re crazy, we try to do things that we think is helping our loved ones, we try our hardest to make sure everything is the way it should be. But, what’s happened to everyone? What happens to the ones that try?” I wondered.

“What do you mean?” He asked.

“What happened to your Dad? What happened to your grandfather? Great grandfather? ..Is there no one left to these families besides the ones that are here with me now?”

“My father killed my sisters and my mother, my grandfather killed himself, and my great grandfather experimented on his wife which eventually killed her. Happy now?”

“Not even close..” I replied, sighing heavily to myself.

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“So.. You tried to stop it all by getting rid of the only known Dubois’ to be alive, which I’ll remind you again that it was your own children and your wife, just to stop anything else bad from happening?”

“More or less, yes.”

“Well, like you’ve said a million times already, you failed. I’m here, my son’s and daughter’s are here, my sisters are here and their husbands, their children.. Looks like it’s never going to stop because I sure as hell am never going to be the one to lay a single violent finger on my family. So, with that being said, I’d appreciate it if you never showed up like this again. I’ve had hope that one day it would be mom instead of you, but it’s always you, wearing the same goddamn thing, saying the same stupid shit over and over. If you want us to live, if you’re worried that I might fall off the handle and do something to them, then leave me alone. You’re the only thing that shows me how right you are about us, that I’m nuts because you’re obviously dead, yet here you are.. Feeding me all of this information as if you want me to do something about it and I won’t. I’ll never stoop down to your level, I’ll never hurt anyone again.. Just leave me and what’s mine alone.”

“I’m sorry, Jason, our minds just don’t work that way. You’re the one that wants advice, guidance, some kind of understanding, so here I am. We’ll see each other again, I’m sure of it..” He replied.

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I shut my eyes and took a deep breath in, letting it out slowly and I checked out of the corner of my eye to see if my father was still sitting on the bench, but he was gone.. Good. I didn’t really have any plans on what I would do about my father, I wasn’t sure how much more I could take, listening to him repeat himself over and over about how he had failed at killing all of us the night that he tried. I could tell he had regret, but it wasn’t for trying to kill his family, it was failing at doing so. To think that if he had succeeded, it made me sick to think about how none of my children would be here, Lana would still be alive, Faline would’ve never met me and we never would have had that one night at college and I wouldn’t have my twins, I wouldn’t have Bahiti, Hitomi would’ve never married John and had Helena, Anya would’ve never met her husband.. So many lives other than our own would be so different had my father succeeded; whether they’re better or worse, with or without us, I’ll never know. 

“Be good, boys,” I said sternly as I walked passed Gareth and Gibson to go inside and search for everyone else.

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I walked into the complex and I loved that we had the place to ourselves mostly. Bahiti stood by the edge of the skating rink, watching Bennu skate by herself and I joined her by the edge, watching her skate as well. After Faline and I had split up and she moved out, it didn’t take me long to get back in touch with Bennu and catch her up on everything that’s been happening. I told her about Faline and how she wasn’t involved in my life anymore and I told her about how I gained custody of Lucy and everything involving Faline and the boys. We started dating then and eventually I introduced Bennu and Bahiti to Lucy, Gareth and Gibson. Bennu and Lucy became friends quickly and Lucy absolutely loved the idea of a little sister more than her little troublesome brothers, Lucy and Bahiti liked to spend time with one another and play together. The boys loved to have someone younger than them around to tease and torment, but at the same time they loved playing with Bahiti and showing her new things; they’ve almost become more protective over Bahiti than I already was. The twins took a few years to accept Bennu being around more, but they seem to like her just fine now.

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Bennu and I got married around 5 years ago and were even thinking about having another baby together, but it just never really happened; my life was hectic enough as it was, and although I would’ve been ecstatic if she were to get pregnant again, I knew I’d have to sacrifice a lot more than I already was to deal with the baby; not to mention a mountain of more stress and responsibility that I wasn’t stable enough for. I smirked softly as I watched Bennu struggle to keep her balance as she strolled around in skates for the first time in her life, admiring how well she was doing. I looked to the opposite side of the rink and noticed Lucy by herself now and I guessed that her friends had left, watching Bennu like I was and she gave Bennu encouraging words to keep her going without falling.

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“I hope she doesn’t fall,” Bahiti said softly and I looked over towards her with a smile.

“She won’t, look at her.. She’s a natural,” I replied and I looked to Bennu who was already smiling at me  before she passed us in the rink. “Why aren’t you out there with her?” I wondered.

“I don’t know.. It looks hard, and I don’t wanna fall.. I know I’m going to,” she replied with a sigh.

“No you wouldn’t, you’re strong and confident just like your mother. Look at how well she’s doing and it’s her first time. You know how to ride a bike, don’t you?”

“Yeah.. You taught me how,” she confirmed.

“Well, then of course you can skate. It’s a little harder than a bike, but not impossible. You can do it, baby,” I replied with a warm smile.

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Bennu came out from the rink and I watched her as she removed her skates, admiring her slender legs and she looked up to me and smiled as she put on her sandals. Every chance I could get, I’d check her out and lust after her, I couldn’t help it. I’m proud of myself for being faithful to Bennu, even despite than many tempting opportunities that still come my way, but I have no reason to stray any further; Bennu is what I’ve always wanted, all I’ve ever wanted since the day I met her. I looked to Bahiti for a moment, “Why don’t you go over to Lucy and see if she’ll skate with you?” I suggested, looking back over to Bennu and noticing an inviting smile on her lips.

“Okay,” she agreed, running off then to go to Lucy as I made my way over to Bennu.

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I walked up to her slyly, “And where do you think you’re going, huh?” I teased, putting my hands around her waist and pulling her against me as she let out a gentle giggle.

“Looking for my handsome husband,” she replied with a gentle bite of her bottom lip.

“Well, we haven’t spent time together yet here at the fest, how about you meet me in that photo booth behind you and we can take some dirty pictures,” I suggested, hearing her let out another gentle giggle as I leaned in and pecked her lips softly, “Come, on.”

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I looked around to see what Lucy and Bahiti were doing, but they weren’t looking towards us and I motioned with my head for Bennu to follow me. I walked towards the photo booth and stepped in and she joined me in the booth with no time to spare. I watched as she entered the money needed to get the picture taking started and I sat on the bench, running my hands up and down her legs as she faced the screen. She faced me quickly when she was done and pressed her lips to mine harshly, deepening the kiss instantly and she disconnected after the first flash as her lips were like a waterfall down my chin, neck, over my clavicle, pulling my shirt up to kiss my chest and her lips soon danced just above the rim of my shorts. Another camera flash and she undid my pants, looking down at her as she looked up to me, my lips parted and panting softly with anticipation. No matter where we were, Bennu and I constantly kept things entertaining and new, whether our moods were good or bad, it always ended in a loving or rough way that involved little to no clothing. We talked about things, we understood one another, we kept each other in line and we still haven’t had any type of discrepancy that would threaten what we had or make either of us think of leaving the other. It just.. Worked. 

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After a joyous, spent-too-long-in-the-photo-booth time, I buckled my pants and she laughed excitedly, my eyes wandering up and down her as she walked out wiping her thumb over her bottom lip. I gathered myself quickly and followed her out of the booth, seeing her eyeing the pictures that were taken and she giggled. Bennu looked to me with a seductive grin and handed off the photos to me, “You should get rid of that before one of the kids see.” I smirked flirtatiously and watched her begin to walk away from me and I looked at the photos, seeing most of them were of me making pleasure-filled smiles and the back of Bennu’s head at the bottom. I felt my face grow warm and I folded the pictures, tearing it up then and shoving the pieces into my pocket.

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I watched Lucy skate with Bahiti for a little while, seeing her teaching Bahiti how to keep her balance and how to stop. Lucy soon left Bahiti in the rink and came out, undoing her skates and putting her normal shoes on and she walked over to me. “Dad, can I go out with my friends now? I’ve been here for like a million hours already.”

“Oh, come on.. Is it that bad to spend time with your siblings?” I asked.

“Well.. No, that’s not what I mean.. I just, wanna go out.. You know.. Without my little siblings?” She added and I chuckled.

“Where are you going and who with?”

“Dad, it’s always with Cara. You know that, she’s my best friend.”

“Any guys?”

“Daaaaaaaad.. Come on, we just wanna go to the movies or something.”

“Or something..?” I questioned a little more sternly.

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“Dad, it’s Cara.. She’s as prude as they come. No guys, just a movie. Okay?” She asked sweetly, though it was still hard for me to say yes right away.

“Well, true.. But there’s guys at the movies, so who are you meeting there?”

“Oh my god.. Dad.. Plleeaasseee? Please stop being so protective and let me go! It’s just a movie, Cara’s Mom is going to pick us up, its fineeee,” she continued to stress with a smile.

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“So.. If I call Cara’s Mom, she’ll know you two are at the movies together not meeting anyone else?” I questioned sternly still.

Lucy put on a huge smile and batted her long, beautiful eyelashes, “Please, Dad? Cara needs to get out more and I’m fun, I’m her best friend and I wanna take her out and be there for her. Pleeeeeaaase?”

“Only if you start dolling yourself down. You’re too pretty, Princess. I’m not worried about you, I’m just worried about everyone else,” I say with a smirk and she only smiles more.

“I’ll be fine, Dad, you know me. I even still have that knife you gave me in my purse and I have pepper spray on my key ring. I’ll be fine,” she stressed more and I sighed, soon nodding.

“Alright, but be home before 11:00.”

“12:00.” She compromised.

“11:00.”

“1:00.”

“11:30.”

“1:00.”

“Midnight.” My final offer.

“Okay, midnight.” Lucy confirmed and I leaned in to peck her forehead.

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Lucy took home Gareth before she went out with Cara and was driving in front of me as I drove Bahiti, Bennu and Gibson home. “Did you guys have fun?” I asked.

“Yeah! It was so fun,” Bahiti replied.

“Yeah, Gareth and I had a waterballoon fight, it was awesome!” Gibson added.

“Who won?” I asked.

“Gareth… But I got him a lot, too!”

“I bet you did, he’s hard to beat though. You’ll get him next time, Gibs,” I added and I heard him chuckle.

“Damn right I will!”

Language, Gibson..” Bennu warned him and I saw in my rear view mirror him make an embarrassed expression and he smiled towards her.

“Sorry..” He apologized and I smirked, seeing Lucy pull into our driveway then and I pulled in after her.

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“Alright, time for bed, everyone,” Bennu announced once we all got inside.

“Whyyyyyyyy, I’m not tired!” Gareth contested as he walked the slowest up the stairs to his room.

Now, young man,” Bennu added sternly and I looked to her briefly with lust as she always took such good control over them all. Despite Bennu not being Gareth and Gibson’s mother, they listened to her as if she were Faline and I was grateful that they were so compliant to her words just as they were to mine. ” Goodnight,” she added and the three of them replied just the same.

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I looked back over to Bennu when I heard the boys and Bahiti’s bedroom doors close, seeing her still smiling from whatever was on her mind and I tightened my grip around her waist a little more. “Did you enjoy yourself today?” I wondered.

“Yes, very much. I never thought I’d ever roller skate before, it was quite the experience,” she replied with a light chuckle.

“You didn’t even fall once, either. You’re a natural,” I complimented and she looked up to me with a soft smirk. 

“Were you all right today? You sat on the bench outside watching the boys for quite some time. You seemed like you were thinking very hard,” she asked and I lost some of the happiness to my smile.

“Yeah.. I’m fine. I was just.. Thinking about work,” I replied, lying.

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Bennu turned towards me and frowned softly, “Today was a relaxing day, you shouldn’t have worried about work at all,” she replied with a quieter tone and I could tell she felt sorry for me.

“I know, I’m sorry..  There was just a lot on my mind today that I couldn’t seem to shake,” I answered.

“Well, let me help you forget it even more,” she suggested, pushing herself up taller and pressing her lips to mine softly, bringing my hands up to the sides of her neck and returning the kiss without contest.

After a few long passionate seconds, I disconnected our lips and hoisted her into my arms effortlessly and she let out a giddy laugh, “You’re comin’ upstairs with me now, my gorgeous wife,” I added, Bennu holding on as her fingers played with the hair on the back of my head and I brought her quickly up the stairs and into our room.

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It never ceases to amaze me on how I got so lucky. Despite my life seeming like a terrible roller caster ride with more downs than ups and loopholes even I myself have a hard time getting passed, things have smoothed out and I feel as if I’ve finally got my life in control. My children are amazing and I couldn’t have asked for a better outcome to the mistakes I’ve made. Lucy, Gareth, Gibson, Bahiti; they’re all what keeps me sane in this fucked up life of mine and now I have Bennu to thank for making me into the decent man I am today. She keeps me level, honest, and out of trouble; I don’t know what I would do without her.

Generation 2, Chapter 14 Pt2

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I drove away from Bennu’s place, punching the dashboard, “Stupid, stupid, stupid!” I yelled at myself every time my fist hit the hard plastic. I drove around the city aimlessly, berating myself, “Well, great going, genius.. Now the woman you love hates you and never wants you to touch her again. How the fuck do you fix this? How do you keep the boys? How do you have Bennu the way you want her? You can’t go over there and visit with Bahiti without thinking about what Bennu’s wearing or what her lips might taste like that day. You can’t hold her anymore, you can’t kiss her anymore, not to mention you can’t have the best sex of your life anymore.. Arruugghh! Stupid!” I yelled at myself, punching the dashboard once again and my knuckles started to turn red.

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I couldn’t go home, I didn’t want to go back to work, and there was no way I could go back to Bennu’s.. I wound up driving to the only other place I could think of that could help me calm down after all that has happened. I pulled up to the cemetery and the gate was locked, but I managed to hop onto the stone wall that only came up to my shoulders, then jumping over the gate behind it and I got in without a problem.

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I walked through the cemetery quickly and no one else was around, not even the keeper of the land and I was here alone. I walked to my parents graves and looked to my father’s for a few seconds, narrowing my eyes angrily, but I then looked to my mother’s headstone and my expression grew less irritated the more I looked at it. I took a few deep breathes in, letting each of them out slowly but my nerves didn’t calm nearly as much as I needed them to. 

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Mom, I don’t know what to do anymore.. There’s been too many times where something I loved has been threatened to be taken away from me, some of the most important ones I have lost, too.. I can’t lose anything else, I won’t.. I’ve known and loved this woman for so long, I found out we have a daughter together; she’s so, so beautiful.. I wish you could see her. She looks a lot like me, so smart, too.. You’d absolutely adore her, I know it. God I wish you could meet her,” I said softly, sighing and dropping my view to the grown in pink flowers, then back up to her headstone.

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“I love her, she’s the one I want, the one I want to be with, but Faline.. The boys.. Faline’s smart, if I left her, she’d know I’d been lying.. She’ll see in my face that there’s someone else even though I just denied it to her over and under. She’ll find out about Bahiti and I’ll never see her or the boys again,” I stopped, crossing my arms and looking over my shoulder towards the city, “I need to know what to do.. I need help, Ma. How do I keep the boys and have Bennu the way I want her so badly?” I questioned, my attention coming back to her headstone, “How do I get what I want without losing everything all at once?”

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I stepped closer to her grave and knelt down, holding my arm with my other hand, unable to hold back my tears and I felt one fall down my cheek. “Mom, please.. Anything. Show me anything, tell me what to do,” I begged, waiting there and keeping silent for what seemed like minutes as I wept there like a child. I felt so pathetic, only during desperate times did I ever ask so much from my deceased mother, especially knowing that after this long of feeling nothing from her, I knew she still wouldn’t help now. But, hell, I tried anyways..

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I crawled towards her headstone and turned around, leaning my back against it and looking up at the huge black sky full of blinking stars. “I wish you were still here.. It’d be so much easier if you were just still here,” I said softly. I stared up at the stars for I don’t know how long, watching each one individually for a few moments before switching to the next. The night was cool and each gentle breeze made me calmer by the minute, feeling a presence around me that was slightly comforting, but I was less eased by it than I thought I should be. It didn’t feel like my mother. A sudden force of weight fell over me and I felt uncomfortable, a gentle shiver down my spine and I didn’t feel alone anymore.

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I tilted my head down, away from the stars and my eyes searched the cemetery, taking a moment to adjust to the extra darkness the trees cast over the land. My eyes soon met the cement bench about 100 feet away from me, seeing a figure sitting upon it and I sat up slowly, “Hello?” I called out softly, not seeing the figure react to me as their head tilted up to look at the stars. I sat up more, climbing slowly to my feet and I dusted the back of my pants off, beginning to take a few hesitant steps towards the bench not too far from my parents graves. I looked back towards my mother, then around the cemetery once more to check if anyone else was there besides the stranger and I and we were all alone, my heartbeat accellerating quickly as I grew closer and I recognized the back of the man’s head, my body beginning to shake.

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I reached the bench and looked to the side of the man’s head, “This.. Can’t be happening,” I said softly, looking to the side of my father’s face and seeing his spiced-brown hair was now older and streaked gray, “You’re dead,” I continued. He didn’t look over at me when it was obvious I was standing near him, but he spoke instead.

“Not who you expected, I’m guessing..” He voiced quietly, his tone deeper and more intimidating than I remember. I didn’t respond, simply walking past him and standing on the edge of the tiny hill before us, “Probably the last person you wanted to see,” he continued. 

“Lucky guess,” I eventually replied, hearing a hummed chuckle come from him behind me.

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“What’s wrong? Not excited to see me?”

“Fuck you,” I spat quickly back at him.

“Still the little prick you always were, I see,” he replied and my spine tingled, I could feel him looking at me. I didn’t respond, I had nothing to say to him; he’s not who I wanted and asked to talk to. “Not even going to stick up for yourself.. That’s new. You were such a strong child, but I see you’ve only grown into a weak man. You’ve gone downhill, Jason. You never hesitated to throw my words back in my face, what’s so different now?” He wondered, cringing at him saying my name and it felt so weird to hear his voice again; how was this happening? Was I imagining this, or was he some sort of ghost like Archor was?

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“I know I asked for help, but not this, this is far from it.. I get someone like you to hover over me rather than someone who actually cared about me, someone like-”

“What, your mother? Sorry kiddo, she couldn’t make it this time, she doesn’t like watching her sons life crumble before her eyes,” he replied.

“But you do?” I asked quickly in return, turning my head and looking over his way, but still refusing to look directly at him; I couldn’t.

“No, I didn’t say that. I’m here because I can handle things better than she and you can. You’d both just end up crying on each others shoulders all night, she out of grief from what you’ve become and you out of happiness because you get to see Mommy again,” he answered and anger built up inside me. “So, four children, huh? Just like your old man,” He changed the subject.

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“I’m nothing like you.”

He ignored me, “Three of them are yours, only 2 are from the same mother, and one that isn’t yours at all, interesting life you’ve been making for yourself,” he began again and I let out a deep breath of annoyance, hating him even bringing the subject up. “First one, dead.. Faline’s a catch; small, frail, cute.. A good mother, yet the only reason you don’t like her is because she knows how promiscuous you can be and she has every right to think that. How many woman have you been with since you moved in with Faline?” He wondered, my hands beginning to shake with anger, “A dozen, I could imagine. Oh, and you’re last princess of the ball is a stripper whom you’ve just so happen to impregnate when you sleep with her at her place of work where it isn’t even allowed.. How low are you trying to go? How many more lives are you going to ruin, including your own? You can’t have everything you want, Jason..”

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“Don’t ever talk about them like you know them. You don’t know shit about them or me,” I warned.

“Is that so?” He asked bluntly. 

“I’ve had my doubts about every one of them. I doubted Lana ever since Lucy was born, I doubted Faline was going to last this long with me aleady, and I doubted that I’d ever get to see Bennu again. But, I’m trying to keep them all close to me for my children’s sake. I love them all and I’d do anything for them to make them happy, which is more than I can say for you.. I’m sure you’ve had your doubts about Mom. Never looked around the corner? Wished you’d never met her? Everyone makes mistakes..”

“Yeah, and you’ve made a lot so far now..” He replied and I clenched my teeth, “But, I can admit to that, I can admit I never wanted a family, but I gave your mother what she wanted regardless. And I was never unfaithful, I never so much as looked at another woman in that way.”

“Well, aren’t you just a saint. Killing your wife and attempting to kill your children as well is far less ungrateful,” I replied sarcastically, “I’d rather be unfaithful than kill someone, and on top of that being someone I cared about.”

“You’ve done both, so that still makes you half the man I am,” he replied and I heard him stand to his feet, still feeling his eyes on me and I thought about his words for a moment.

“What are you talking about? I’ve never killed anyone,” I answered sternly. 

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“Lana.. Did you really think she fell off herself? She was such a party girl, her attire was her everything, you think she’d really fall and slip in her heels? She was no stranger to a drunken stagger.. She needed help over that edge.”

I faced him instantly, “What the fuck are you saying? That I went there and pushed her off myself? Are you fucking insane?” I yelled and it only made me more angry when he smirked to my question.

“Funny you should mention that.. It’s all genetics, boy. You don’t know what you’re doing when you’re doing it, it just.. Happens. Like it’s something that’s meant to be. You’ve never felt it before? Blacked out and couldn’t explain it?”

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“Shut up, just leave me the hell alone! I wanted Mom because I hate you, I fucking hate you more than anything, so why would I believe a goddamn thing you’d ever say to me? Why are you here and she’s not!” I continued to yell at him.

“I’ve already told you..” He warned, “And you must’ve felt this anger before with something.. If I were to guess, you felt it before coming here, and you felt it before going over to Lana’s so late at night, breaking into her home and giving her that little extra help that she needed to be ridden from your life so you could keep Lucy,” he continued and I put my hands into my hair, pulling at the roots slightly from the built up anger.

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I walked away from him, unable to look at his face anymore and I stopped about ten feet away when he spoke again, “I didn’t want to do it, Jason..”

“Do what? Ruin my life?”

“Well, yeah, I guess if that’s how you see it. I never wanted you to have a life, anyways, any of us. Sometimes I wish I never met your mother,” he answered and I looked over my shoulder slightly. “I didn’t want you to become me, I couldn’t let you carry on the burden, so I.. I guess I torched everything, every trace, but I failed. Your great grandmother told me to be happy and to live my life with your mother, even despite everything that we both knew. I tried to get rid of it all and correct the mistakes I made, but it was too late, anyways.”

“And what did you two know?” I asked sarcastically, not bothering to give him sympathy.

“That we’re all out of our minds,” he replied and I scoffed, not believing a word he said, “You think it’s a joke, but it’s the only reason why I’d try and stop all of this. I couldn’t let anything continue, for your sake. Us men, our gene, it’s dangerous, we’re toxic and I needed to stop it all.. But th-that dammed dog ruined everything,” he finished and my eyes widened slowly.

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I turned around to face him, “Archor.. You did kill him, didn’t you? You’re mad at him for coming back and saving your children from death that you were going to be the cause of?” I asked angrily. 

“You don’t understand.”

“Then make me!” I yelled, “You owe me that much you son of a bitch,” I answered with more rage than I could muster.

“The pain.. All the pain that you’re feeling, you’ve caused and are going to cause would never happen. Jason.. Our family is hexed, we hurt the things we care about in the end of everything, no matter how hard we try not to,” he continued and I still couldn’t believe a word he said. How can he say such things? Making up excuses, blaming it on a curse when he killed my mother?

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I took the first chance I got and swung at him, missing the first few times and I never even grazed him, “How can you blame it on such bullshit! You killed my mother, your wife! How could you?” I yelled as I swung, still unable to strike him and he pulled back perfectly just out of my reach.

“Knock it off, you child! I tried to take responsibility and tried to stop the pain in this family, but I failed, accept it and deal with it for yourself now! You’re mother meant more to me than anything and I’d kill for her, but that hole was dug too deep already. I grew selfish for my own needs and I forgot what was important, and that was to not carry on this burden. I gave her everything she wanted despite what did and needed to do.. But I realized what I did only caused more pain, or would if I didn’t put a stop to it, but I failed! Now it’s on you! Think for yourself instead of running to Mommy every damn time, you coward, and figure out what to do about it because I sure as hell can’t do anything about it now!” He yelled back and grabbed the front of my suit, throwing me to the ground without so much as a struggle on his part.

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I turned as I was thrown, landing on my bottom and I looked up to the one thing that scared me more than anything; I felt as if I was 8 years old again having a fight in the house with my father. “You were always such a Momma’s boy. You hated me even before you could walk. Mommy isn’t here to help you, so what the hell are you going to do about it? Are you going to get rid of Faline to be with your mistress and the girl like you did to Lana to keep Lucy? Or are you going to be able to just be friends with your stripper whore and stay with Faline? Might as well make the best out of what you have already and don’t do anything stupid, or those boys are going to grow up hating you like you hated me,” he warned and I couldn’t breath; how did he know everything so clearly? The terrible things I had contemplated within my own mind and never spoke allowed? Despite me not believing a word he said, why did it sound so just and set in stone? Where there any other options besides the two he gave me?

“Wha…” I hesitated, succumbing to the fact that Dad showed up instead of Mom and it was the best option I had now, “W-What do I do?” I asked pleadingly, unable to take my eyes away from his hateful gaze.

“You’ve never asked me for advice..” He replied and I watched as he looked away from me briefly, but I couldn’t read his expression well; it almost looked as if he was appreciative, but I had never seen that before so I couldn’t be sure. He looked back to me and I held my breath again, “Think for yourself, be a fucking man and deal with it. Take care of what’s yours how you see fit. That’s all I’ve got, Jason,” he replied, lessening his cold stare and his expression went blank for a few moments.

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“B-But.. What do I do?” I asked, looking down at my lap, “What does that all mean? How can-” I continued, yet stopping when I looked back up and not seeing my father in front of me anymore, gone without so much as a sound. “D-Dad..?” I questioned and looked around frantically, twisting around on the ground and searching the cemetery, but I was alone again. “Dad!” I called out and looked around once more, but still nothing.

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I stood to my feet weakly, using the tree close to me for help and my head began to spin, dizzy after what I had just imagined and I wiped the back of my hand over my forehead; I was on fire. I couldn’t handle anything now. My mind was overflowing with things to worry about, ponder, contemplate, consider.. Too much. I staggered my way back towards the cemetery gate, not looking back at my parent’s graves once and I collided into the fence, catching my footing. I gathered myself for a moment, catching my breath and trying to calm my headache. I stood on the rocks next to me and jumped over the fence, going back to my car, getting in and sitting there for a few minutes, eyes shut and panting mouth open as I tried to comprehend everything I had just seen and heard. After about ten minutes of just sitting there, I pulled out my phone and noticed it was off; I remembered turning it off before I got to Bennu’s place. I turned it back on and checked the time, a little passed 11:45 pm and I started the car, deciding to go home after all of this.

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I got home and noticed a car in the driveway but I couldn’t tell who it belonged to, not helping my nerves settle at all as I starred at the mysterious vehicle and touched the hood for a few seconds; the car was still warm, whoever was here just got here before me. I walked into a dark house, looking around the foyer and standing there for a moment, hearing voices coming from the living room and I stepped slowly towards it, keeping each of my steps silent.

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The voices grew a little louder and I recognized the tones, peaking my head around the corner to confirm who I was thinking and I saw Anya and Julia in the living room with Faline; that must be Simon’s car or maybe Julia’s boyfriends, if she had one. I let out a quiet sigh, my heart had been racing at the thought of another man I didn’t know being in the house with Faline, with the twins, with Lucy, but I was relieved when it was only my sisters. Wait, what were they doing here anyway? 

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I heard Faline let out a large sigh as she sat on the couch and my sisters joined her, “Thanks for coming, I’m sorry it’s so late, but it’s my only free time I have after work when Jason isn’t here and after the boys and Lucy are sleeping,” Faline said softly and I could tell in her expression that she wasn’t happy.

It’s not a problem, really, it’s good that you called,” Anya replied.

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So, wha’d the little shit do now?” Julia asked and my brows furrowed at her insult, I already knew they were talking about me, or were going to. I could even tell by how Julia worded the question that they’ve talked about me before in the passed and it made me a little uneasy.

“Well, so much has happened since we’ve last gotten together, I don’t know where to start,” Faline replied. Was I going to sit here the whole time and listen to everything they said, or should I leave and go upstairs, shower, and go to bed and let them talk? The curiosity I had was beginning to be too much to bare, so I brought my head back out of their view and leaned against the bookshelf, deciding to listen and I’d retreat if they simply threatened to walk this way; I wanted.. No, needed to hear what she was going to say.

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Hmm.. Has he fired his secretary yet?” Anya wondered, starting things off for Faline.

“No, she’s still there.. After all this time and losing count on how many occasions I’ve asked him to and he still won’t do it.”

Have you told him she’s an idiot and can’t do math? Has the risk of losing his business even if she screws up any of the important paperwork?” Julia wondered.

“Yeah, I’ve told him that he could lose so much money because of her mistakes, but he still has someone checking her work, or he does it himself.. It’s such a waste of time to need to check it for her, she should just be able to do it and do it correctly. She’s just this ditsy bitch who can’t stand to even look at me and I know that she likes him.. He claims he doesn’t see it, though. But, I feel like they’ve..” Faline answered, hesitating.

Have you ever caught him?” Anya wondered and my heart raced a little.

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“No.. But it still doesn’t mean that nothing’s going on, or that something hasn’t happened already.. The way she looks, the things she wears at the office around him, it drives me insane.. But, I’m sure he doesn’t mind eyeing her all damn night,” Faline replied with a slightly angered tone. “I’m sorry, I know how hard this must me to talk about him with me, seeing as he’s your guys’ baby brother and all..”

We’re all adults here, and we want to help you and Jason, we just need to know what’s wrong,” Anya cooed sweetly.

Yeah, just skip the gross details,” Julia added and I can imagine the discomfort in her expression when she said that.

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“We had a fight the other day, a pretty big one.. It was about his secretary and I accused him of sleeping with her because what other reason was there for him to keep her? Even when I didn’t know anything set in stone.. He blew up, completely flew off the handle and yelled at me like crazy,” Faline began and I could already hear the mixed emotions coming out in her tone, “He was furious and I didn’t know what to say to him after that because he was right with everything he said. I had no proof, and..” She stopped, pausing for a moment, no doubt all three of us waiting eagerly for her to continue. “Well.. We haven’t, um..”

How long has it been?” Anya cut her off with a question, knowing that Faline was struggling with her words.

“Maybe about.. Four, five months? I don’t know..” Faline replied and I did the math in my head, trying to remember when really was the last time we had sex and I couldn’t remember either. “I guess it all kind of started when he hired his secretary.. That’s why I couldn’t take it anymore and I brought it up to see if he would deny it and he did.. But it just makes too much sense to me in my head. If it’s not her, though, I honestly think it could be someone else..”

Did he act like this in college?” Julia wondered and I sighed to myself, knowing the answer before Faline could say it.

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“Yeah, he was the big man on campus. Everyone knew him, especially the girls.. I honestly couldn’t tell you how many times I’ve seen girls at a party crying over him because he had ‘moved on to the next’, sometimes during the party, too, he’d move on. Happened with a few of my friends, too.. A lot of friendships crumbled because of him, and I watched more happen than anyone else.. But, I was the last one I guess, the cherry on top of his college cake,” Faline replied. My blood was boiling and I couldn’t believe she would tell my own sisters the things I did in college when I had changed so much since then, and Faline knew it. I especially didn’t want my sisters to know that, to know I was such a glutton for different women and even I had no idea how many women I’ve slept with; the number probably extends into the hundreds, though.

Ew, it’s so weird to know that Jason was That Guy..” Julia replied.

Stop..” Anya spoke towards Julia. “Faline, do you really think he’d be able to do something like this with all of what he already has on the table?” Anya wondered, and from what it sounded like, she was defending me.

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You said yourself you have no proof, and I’m not trying to make you sound wrong, but who are you to assume such things when he graduated 4 years ago? Who says he isn’t passed it?” Anya continued and I couldn’t describe my appreciation for her.

“He said he spent the night at the office last night after our fight, but he didn’t,” Faline replied, listening to the dead silence in the room and my heartbeat quickened even more. “I followed him, that’s why I called you to babysit last night, Anya.. He was at the bar until about midnight, then he suddenly came out, went straight to his car and sped off. I followed him to an apartment building, the one on the northeast edge of the city.. He was there until I got too tired to wait anymore, so I came home before I fell asleep in the car,” Faline finished and there was another silence within the room and I felt sick to my stomach. She.. She spied on me, she knew where Bennu lived, but not who she was.

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Faline.. I know with what you said, it seems like a lot of what you’re worrying about, but spying on him? You must’ve had this distrust with him for a while for you to call Anya when you know she works at the hospital and is on call all the time,” Julia replied and I listened intently as my body quaked with fear, “You have children to look after. Anya has her job to worry about, who are you to put your children on someone else with a more important job than you just to spy on my little brother?” Julia finished and I was warmed by her defense.

“I knew this wasn’t a good idea..” Faline said softly.

Julia.. Stop,” Anya demanded, “We’re not here to judge anyone, we’re here to help. She caught him going to someone else’s place, he stayed there, I think she might be right, as much as I hate to admit it,” Anya continued and I peaked in, seeing Faline looking at no one while Anya and Julia shared an electric stare. 

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So.. He’s seeing someone else let’s say, what are you going to do?” Julia asked, taking my attention away from them again and only listening as I leaned against the bookshelf again.

“You know… I’m sorry Julia, that I’m saying this.. That it may seem like I’m calling your brother a unfaithful asshole,” Faline said with anger in her tone, “But I don’t want to lose him, Gareth and Gibson are too young for us to separate, but I know that he’s not being honest with me. I know him, maybe more than you. But, to answer your question, I don’t know what I want to do. What would you do if the father of your children has been cheating on you, and you don’t even know for how long?” Faline spat back at Julia and I clenched my hands into fists, wanting to bust into there and defend my sister, yet I couldn’t, let alone had no idea how to defend myself at this point when she’s caught me red handed.

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I’d leave him, or make him tell the truth. He denied it, you TRIED already, and he denied it. Why not believe him? Oh man, it’s a coincidence that he stopped touching you when he hired his secretary, but seeing as how you seem to never be there, how the hell can you say that he’s sleeping with her if you’ve never even witnessed it?” Julia spat back and I could’t help it, I had to peak in again and see them. Julia stood to her feet sternly, “Maybe you just need to gain a little more self confidence before accusing someone of something they said they didn’t do.. It isn’t healthy, especially if you’re still thinking about it and following him now after he told you no,” Julia replied and I couldn’t describe the newly earned respect I had for Julia, even if she was wrong to defend me. I watched then as Julia looked to Anya, “Enjoy dealing with this, I’m done,” she finished, walking passed them and towards me and I panicked a little.

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I heard Anya saying something to Faline but I was too preoccupied by Julia making her way towards me.. Shit. What do I do? She’s walking over here too fast for me to hide. Fuck.. I thought fast and did the first thing that came to mind, seeing Julia come out of the living room and I pulled her quickly, covering her mouth and holding her against me as she struggled briefly, “Stop! Stop.. It’s me, it’s Jason,” I said in a whisper and she stopped struggling so I let her go. She turned to face me with an angered expression and grabbed my hand, pulling me away from the living room and into the foyer, then out the front door.

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Julia let me go and turned to face me, “What the fuck is wrong with you, huh? So you’re a cheating, lying, sex addict now? How long were you listening? You know that she knows, right?” Julia began and I sighed harshly.

“I was there from the beginning, I heard everything. I got here a little after you two did,” I replied, still unable to calm my nerves.

So it’s true, yeah? You’re seeing someone else behind her back? Who’s apartment is that that you went to?”

“No ones,” I said bluntly.

Don’t you ever bullshit me.. Do I know her? Do any of us do? Is it your secretary’s place?” She asked, 

“No.. It’s not her place, and no one knows her. Now drop it.”

No, I’m not going to drop it because I’m in this. I’ve been in this with Anya and Hitomi and Faline for a while now,” she began and I shut my eyes in defeat, hating that Hitomi knew as well, “I don’t know what it is that you think you’re doing, but Faline’s on to you, you’re not hiding this well at all.. And you shouldn’t be hiding anything in the first place. Why don’t you get over your college days and grow the fuck up? You have kids to worry about, Jason, they’re just toddlers.. They need you around more than ever at this age, you can’t just act like they don’t exist and run off to have fun with some bimbo who shouldn’t mean anything to you! Grow up already, okay?” She replied angrily and I didn’t know what to say to her, my blood was still boiling and it bothered me that she sounded a lot like Dad when talking to me.

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“You don’t get it.. I know my children need me and I would never put anyone else before them.. I’m taking care of my kids, all of them, all four,” I replied and I watched as Julia gave me an intimidating expression.

Whoa, whoa, wait.. Four, did you say? Last time I checked it was only three,” she paused, nodding her head when she eventually figured it out, “I get it. The one in the apartment is another baby momma, huh?” She asked and I hung my head, unable to look at her anymore. “Jesus, Jason.. Do you even know what the word protection means?” She asked harshly.

“Ew.. Julia, you’re the last person I need to have this talk with..” I replied, trying to avoid this topic with my sister and she sighed, looking down at my suit for a few moments.

Girl? Boy? How old?”

“She’s a little younger than the twins, only by a few months,” I admit.

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How long have you been seeing this woman?”

“I knew her all throughout college.. After I graduated we lost contact, but she actually found me yesterday and told me everything and showed me our little girl. She invited me to stay so I could meet her in the morning, so I did and I fell in love the moment I met her. I should’ve known better than to sleep somewhere else besides home, but I couldn’t leave.. I didn’t know when the next chance I was going to have to get to meet her,” I continued. Suddenly, earlier today popped back into my head and I remembered when Faline had asked me where I was last night, and I lied.. She didn’t call me out on it, she even let me pleasure her knowing full well I was lying. Why didn’t she tell me then that she didn’t believe me? Why didn’t she tell me that she spied on me?

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Are you ever going to tell Faline? Or are you just going to let her follow you around, spying on you and finding out that way?” 

I didn’t know what to say to Julia.. I couldn’t keep this up forever and have Faline find out the hard way, I’d come home to an empty house. Yet, what the hell would I say to her if I confessed? I thought I loved her in the beginning, but all we did was grow apart and stop trying; she’d always be important to me as the mother of my boys, but I just couldn’t deal with this anymore. “I’ll figure it out..”

Do you even want to be with her anymore? Try to fix this?” She wondered.

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“No.. I mean, I want to be on okay terms with her, but I don’t want to be with her,” I replied and Julia sighed, looking down to the ground and nodding in understanding.

You wanna be with the other mother, or just someone that’s not Faline?” She asked in return.

“I wanna be with the other mother.. I always have since I met her, even before having our little girl. Her name’s Bennu, our little one is Bahiti,” I replied, looking up to Julia.

Whoa, exotic names.. Is she foreign or something?”

“Yeah, she’s Egyptian.”

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Ooooo, sexyyyy,” Julia said in a teasing manner and I couldn’t help but let out an embarrassed chuckle. “Hey, listen.. You don’t have to stay here tonight if you don’t want, you can always crash at my place.. Might be a little easier than seeing her and having to interact with her if you’re not ready.. Give you some time to gather your thoughts, I guess..” She offered. I was touched by her concern and worry for me, but, I needed to be here; I needed to be here for when the kids wake up, I couldn’t abandon them and leave them on Faline just because I was too much of a coward to look Faline in the eye.

“Nah, thanks though.. Not coming home the other night only made things worse.. I don’t wanna do it again and make things even more difficult for when I finally decide to talk to her about everything,” I replied.

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Alright, suit yourself.. Call me if you ever need anything,” she said with a smirk and wrapped her arms around me, hugging me goodbye and I held her in return for a few moments longer than she expected. This was so much better than being with my Dad; Julia gave me real advice, talked me through this and listened to what I had to say. I was so grateful.. “Okay, let go now,” Julia said with a chuckle and I let her go.

“S-Sorry.. But thank you, for hearing what I had to say instead of just hearing Faline’s side..” I replied with an uneasy smile.

Never a problem, lil’ bro.. I’ll see you later. Don’t worry, things will work out soon enough.. And call me when I get to meet Bahiti,” she added, smiling as she walked away backwards pointing a strict finger at me and I nodded, then watched her turn around and leave, phone against her ear as she called a cab.

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I walked back over to the front door, opening it quietly and coming back inside. I stood there a moment, debating on if I should go back towards the living room and continue eavesdropping or if I should go upstairs and go to sleep. As much as I wanted to keep listening, I couldn’t do it; I had heard enough already, and I didn’t like hearing people talk about me behind my back. I went upstairs and to my bedroom, jumping in the shower for a quick few minutes and throwing on a pair of pajama pants when I got out. 

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I walked out into the bedroom and looked around, taking in my surroundings and wondering how much it was going to change soon. Although all of the inadequate objects wouldn’t change drastically, seeing how almost everything was something of mine, I still felt it would be a little empty without Faline, despite how I felt about her and not wanting her anymore. I kept feeling sorry for her, but at the same time I hated it because I was going to be with Bennu when all of this ended. But, I still couldn’t shake the fact that it was going to be hard on the both of us, whenever the time to talk did arrive..

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The baby monitor light lit up, picking up on subtle noises coming from the twins’ room and I looked to it, waiting to hear anything and I heard Gareth start to cry. I was used to him doing it around this time of night, but as I tried to ignore it in hopes he would go back to sleep, he didn’t. His cries got louder and he began calling for Faline and myself and it wasn’t like him to be so awake and upset. I grew a little worried, walking quickly over to the door and going out to go to the boy’s room.

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I opened their door and walked in quietly, seeing Garth standing in his crib and continuing to cry. I went to him instantly and watched him wipe tears from his eyes, “Hey, bud.. What’s wrong? Did you have a nightmare?” I asked with sympathy, watching as he continued to cry and he couldn’t form words just yet. He reached up for me and I picked him up, pulling his cheek to my lips and pecking him a few times, “Calm dooowwnnn,” I continued to talk quietly, trying to get him to stop so he didn’t wake his brother.

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I felt him wrap his arms around my neck tightly and I let out a nervous chuckle, walking him around his room and bouncing him gently, shushing him in hopes to calm him down eventually. As much as a downer this was, I was going to miss it; I knew once Faline and I got around to talking things through, the first thing we’d talk about is her moving out. Things were going to end up like how things went with Lana and Lucy, I wasn’t going to see them every day, every night, ever dinner; I wasn’t going to get to hold them like this whenever they woke up from a bad dream and I wasn’t going to hear Gareth fussing through the baby monitor around this time every night anymore, either.

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I continued to hold Gareth tightly and calm him, feeling his tears on my shoulder as I walked towards the window to look outside, trying to get my mind off of the inevitable. It took Gareth about five minutes to calm down and soon he had calmed to a light sob on my shoulder, feeling his tiny fingers gripping my hair. “Hey, how you doin’, champ? What woke you up?” I questioned.

“B-Bad dream,” he answered quietly and I smirked to his cute behavior.

“It’s okay now.. What was your dream about? What made you scared?”

“I-I wasn’t scared,” he replied confidently through the slight frog still in his throat and I chuckled softly.

“Okay, you weren’t scared, tough guy.. Why were you crying then?” I reworded my first question.

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“It.. It was a monster,” he answered and I rubbed his back, hoping to sooth him even more.

“A monster, huh? Well he’s not here anymore, is he? I’ve got you and he can’t get you anymore, I won’t let him,” I said softly, feeling his grip begin to give and I could tell he was calming down slightly. “There’s no such thing as monsters, only little things inside of your head to trick you. But, you’re stronger than them, right?”

“B-But he.. He was gunna hurt me and Gibs,” he continued quietly and I grew a little more worried. I tried to think of what I could say to him to make him feel better, he needed more of a push.

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“Did I ever tell you about when you were born? Hmm?” I asked and I felt him shake his head ‘no’. “Well, Mommy was scared, just like you. It took you two 4 hours to be born. But, she made it through, she used all of her strength to make sure you guys were born and you know what? You were born first, and Gibson was born two minutes after, which makes you the older brother. You gotta be strong, too, just like Mommy was, and just like how I’m doing now for you. You gotta do that for Gibs, to be strong and protect him, keep him close and don’t ever let anything come between you two, not even the scariest of monsters. Understand?” I concluded, feeling him then nod against my shoulder and his crying had finally stopped.

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I felt Gareth burrow into my shoulder a little, getting comfortable in my arms and I continued to rub his back soothingly. I swayed back and forth, trying to get him to fall back asleep with a newly calmed mind and I soon heard his exhales getting heavier. I continued to look out the window, watching the calm waters as I felt each of Gareth’s tiny breathes against my neck and feeling his tiny, quick heartbeat against my chest. I felt relaxed and nostalgic with all of them, unable to be or stay angry at anything when they were like this in my arms. I couldn’t hold Lucy like this anymore, so I took every opportunity I could to hold them when they wanted me to; they were all growing up so fast, I wasn’t ready for it.

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I soon turned around, still swaying Gareth back and forth in my arms as he slept against my shoulder and I looked up, seeing Faline by the door and I froze for a moment, wondering how low she had been standing there. We stared at one another for a few long seconds, watching as she dropped her gaze first and even through the dark I could see her eyes beginning to water. She traced her finger under her eyelid gently, acting as if she wiped something away other than a tear and she turned around, walking out of the room and shutting the door softly behind her.

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I let out a deep sigh through my nose and walked towards Gareth’s crib and as gently as I could, I pulled him from my shoulder and laid him down. He stirred a little as he slept, getting used to where he had been placed instead of being held and luckily he stayed asleep. 

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I walked to the door and left the boy’s room just as quietly as Faline did, looking then over to my bedroom door and seeing it finish shutting from Faline. I stood there a moment and contemplated going in to talk to her or just leaving her be, but I didn’t know what to do. If I didn’t go in there and act like nothing was wrong, she’d only assume worse things, but then again, she probably knew I had seen Simon’s car from Anya being here since I was home early and I’d most likely question it. It was getting late, she had work tomorrow morning and I needed to get my sleep, but how were either of us going to get shut eye while occupying the same room and knowing what we both knew? I knew she had talked to my sisters about me, I knew she thought I was cheating on her, and I knew there was no denying it once I walked through that door. But, we had to face it eventually, and despite us both needing our sleep, I thought I was ready to handle it tonight if she wanted to.

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I went to the bedroom door and slowly turned the knob, opening the door and looking in to see the room empty and I let out a relieved sigh, even though I knew she was just in the bathroom. I walked in and shut the door, walking then over to the bathroom and I raised a gently made fist to knock, but I held it back as I heard her crying and sniffling as softly as she could to try and hide it. I sighed lightly, not knowing what to do or what to say to her to make her feel better when I’m probably the last person she wants to see or talk to right now. I wasn’t good at this kind of thing, I’d never had a girlfriend in my life and I never had to break up with anyone before; I just simply moved on and they eventually found out the hard way.. Well, I guess it was the same thing in this case, it was only harder this time because I had children with this woman and I lived with her. But, I couldn’t avoid her forever, nor did I think she could do the same to me.. I remembered my Dad’s words back at the cemetery, telling me to man-up and as much as I didn’t want to, I committed to my raised fist and knocked gently.

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“Faline? Are you okay?” I asked and it took her a few seconds to respond.

“Yeah.. I’m fine,” she replied, her voice giving out a little and I sighed yet again.

I tried the doorknob but it was locked, “Can we talk? ..Please? Can you open the door?” I asked and I listened to silence for a few seconds.

“Uhm..” She cleared her throat a little better, “I was just going to take a bath, I’ll see you tomorrow, okay?” She wondered and already I knew she was trying to avoid me.

I rested my forehead against the door and sighed again, “Faline, it’s almost one in the morning, don’t you wanna get some sleep instead?”

“Why do you want to talk then?” She asked in return and I didn’t know what to say really.

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“Because I don’t like talking to a door,” I replied, starting to get a little irritated, “Can you please, just.. Just open the door.. Okay?”

“I.. I cant,” she replied and I could hear her sobbing lightly again.

“Why?” I demanded to know, getting tired of this through-the-door conversation and I was beginning to have the urge to kick it down. She didn’t answer me and I was growing inpatient with each few seconds that passed without a response, my anger building quickly and I didn’t want to go back now, I couldn’t just give up yet and I hit the door hard with my fist, “Dammit, Faline! I just.. I want to know what’s wrong and I can’t help like this.. Just open the fucking door,” I voiced angrily and I heard shuffling behind the door.

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Faline came to the door and opened it, looking up to me and my expression grew less angered. Tears still fell down her face and I watched as her eyebrows furrowed suddenly in anger and her palm cracked hard against my cheek. My head jerked right and I held onto the door frame to keep myself from stumbling over from the unexpected slap. ..Well, not totally unexpected.. “You can help me by leaving me the hell alone you lying asshole! I can’t even look at you!” She answered and grabbed the door, slamming it in my face and I put my left hand on my cheek, feeling it getting hot under my touch and I stretched my jaw a little to help lessen the pain. 

“Ow..” I said softly; it had been a while since I’ve been slapped, I almost forgot what it felt like.

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Well, this was it.. The beginning to the end of us. “Fine.. Talk to me whenever you’re ready then,” I finished, stepping back from the door slowly and starring at it for a few seconds, not hearing anything but her crying on the other side and I walked towards the bedroom door, walking out and shutting it a little harder than I would’ve liked at this time of night. I walked passed the pool table and went to the couch, sitting upon it and hanging my head, unsure of what to do or if there was even anything I could do now.. I wanted to know desperately how this was going to end, how and when she was going to finally talk to me or even if she was ever going to. Would she just leave while I was at work, making it easier for the both of us? But no, it wouldn’t be easy, it would never be easy. Explaining all of this to the boys? To Lucy? But, as much as I hated to admit it, there were more pros than cons. Sure, Faline would be gone.. But I didn’t want her. Yeah, the boys wouldn’t be something I saw daily like they’re used to, but it could still work out. Hell, it did with Lana and Lucy.. Or did it? I doubted myself, or began to. I grew away from Lana, I’m growing away from Faline; who’s to say I won’t grow away from Bennu? 

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“No..” I said to myself, “I can’t lose all of this and have doubts about who I’m doing it for,” I reassured myself, taking a deep breath in and letting it out slowly, laying down upon the length of the couch and shutting my eyes, hoping that whenever Faline did end up talking to me, I’d actually be capable of letting it all go.

Generation 2, Chapter 1

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I sat on my bed in my room at the frat house, my absent mind completely forgetting that Samantha was over and hadn’t left yet as she gathered her clothes from the floor. Her presence was known when she cleared her throat sarcastically as she stood behind me, but I didn’t bother to look over at her.

“Hello? Earth to Jason! Are you going to call me later?” She wondered and I rolled my eyes without her knowing.

“Yeah, yeah,” I replied casually, stretching my tired body and Samantha sighed heavily behind me.

That was real convincing, Jason,” she said sarcastically and I quickly grew angered.

“Jesus, get off my ass! I said I would. Don’t you have class or something?” I asked with an irritated tone, already annoyed with her nagging and wanting her to leave.

Samantha grabbed up the rest of her clothes quickly and made her way out of my room, “You’re such an ass!” She insulted before shutting my door harder than I would’ve liked her to.

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It’s been years since the explosion at the house. The explosion consumed my parents room, Hitomi’s, and also Anya and Julia’s room that they shared. The fire spread rapidly, eventually taking my room as well and the firemen managed to finally extinguish the flames before the fire took the garage or spread across the grass to Arnica’s barn. Neither me nor any of my sisters ever saw Archor again after that day..

Hitomi’s married now and is a pretty well known Composer, Anya has a boyfriend, but nothing serious so far; another doctor that works with her at the hospital she works at. She’s on her way to becoming a successful surgeon. Julia has no idea what she’s doing with her life; she doesn’t have a boyfriend and is always on the search for jobs. I feel a little sorry for how shitty her life is. Julia and I took our parents death the hardest, while Hitomi and Anya, though still mourning their death as well, live successful lives and manage to get by seemingly without a struggle.. I’m a Junior in college, trying to get my Business degree and I’m surprised I’ve made it this far.. My grades are always bad and I’m always surprised when I get my report cards back telling me that I passed to the next grade; I barely make it by every time. 

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Running clears my mind a little, helps me forget things and helps me calm down whenever I’m feeling stressed or angered; which is quite often. The worst days I have are when I think of my mother. When they investigated what caused the explosion, I overheard the firemen talking to Hitomi while Anya, Julia and I sat in the back of an ambulance. He told her that the oven was leaking gas, and something in the living room triggered everything to ignite. The more and more I thought about what he had said, I remembered that when Hitomi and I were rushing out of the house to see Archor with Anya and Julia, I remembered smelling something strange, and when I forced myself to remember more.. I could’ve swore we had passed a candle holder with lit candles.. My mother would’ve never been so careless about something as serious as leaving candles burning, let alone leaving the stove on and they seemed as if they had been lit no more than a few minutes before us passing them to go outside.. The firemen said that it looked like someone did it on purpose. From that moment on, I was convinced my father was behind it all, and I knew in my gut that he tried to kill himself and take us all with him. Why? I still have no clue..

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Even though I skipped class, the University seemed rather empty today; no one walking around, no study groups sitting in the grass, no hacky-sack sessions that I occasionally would join in on while on my runs.. Nothing. It was kind of nice, the silence was rare and soothing, it made my run more enjoyable. I was getting to be rather popular within the campus; a lot of people found out about what happened to my parents, and I was even a little famous because of my mother and how well-known she was for her paintings. My phone was filled with almost all girls, the only guys in my contacts were the guys from my frat house and a few friends around the campus; the ones around campus weren’t really friends, though, I mostly used them to get discounts on things and get into bars easier than everyone else. Right now I’m seeing Samantha, but only so I can get at her younger sister, Bettie; she was the cuter one.

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My frat house threw the best parties, by far. We would only invite over a few cool dudes we knew and the rest would be ladies; it was normal for the ratio to be one guy to every three girls. Getting into fights was nothing new, either, though a lot of guys tried to steer clear of us. But, we sometimes had party-crashers that would find their way into our parties and they needed to be dealt with, especially whenever it came down to them talking to the girls we invited over. There’s been numerous amounts of ‘swirlies’ given at our place; that’s when you hold someone’s head in the toilet upside down and flush it. I guess we were the most rebellious frat house out of all of them, but still the most known; and sometimes feared. 

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When I got back from my run, I noticed Dean at the table on his laptop, probably looking at porn instead of studying like he should be doing judging by the stupid grin on his face; his grades were surprisingly worse than mine. He had almost the same personality as me, though less successful when it came to hitting on girls. 

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Auturo was in the kitchen, looking at the books on the shelf and he stopped his browsing to look at me and give me a sarcastic stare, “You skipped class again today, didn’t you?” He asked and I rolled my eyes, though he couldn’t see behind my sunglasses. Out of the four of us that lived at the frat house, Auturo seemed the most out of place, but I liked his attitude and he was smart, so whenever I needed him to help me with school, he would help me. He was a dick about it, about a lot of things, but it impressed me that he was able to focus so well on his schooling and he even brought home chicks that I never thought he could get. He just seemed to fit in here.

“Shut up, today’s class wasn’t even important,” I replied with an irritated tone.

“You know that’s why you fail sometimes.. Your attendence matters for some classes, in this case, this one matters. But, you missed it. Again,” he continued to knock me and I continued to grow annoyed. 

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“Don’t piss him off, Auturo, he ain’t got laid in almost 9 hours,” Dean teased in his smooth southern accent and I lightened my mood a little, Dean and I chuckling and Auturo only grew more weary.

“I’m just looking out for you, you shouldn’t miss this class again. Try to remember to go. Finals are in two weeks and if you miss this class like, two more times you’re going to fail, and you won’t pass this year,” Auturo warned and I rolled my eyes once more, though Auturo now could tell I did from the rest of my faces expression. “Fine, don’t listen to the straight A student,” he finished.

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I smiled and patted his shoulder as I walked to the fridge to get something to eat, “Well, thanks for looking out for me, I think I’ll be okay though. The teacher has the hots for me anyways, she wouldn’t fail me after all the attention I’ve been giving her,” I replied with a smile, walking to the microwave and heating up my meal.

Auturo sighed, “Ugh, I don’t even want to know what you mean by that,” he replied and I laughed once more, Dean laughing as well before going upstairs.

“Where’s Sabastian?” I asked, wondering where the fourth musketeer of our pack was.

“I don’t know, probably in class, like you should’ve done today,” Auturo pressed on and left the kitchen. I sighed once more and grew irritated quickly, but he was already out of the room before I could bicker with him any more. 

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I ate my meal alone, my mind going absent as I blindly ate my food only to refuel myself even though I didn’t even have an appetite. 

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I took a shower after my meal, brushing my teeth, gussying up and trying to look presentable as I contemplated going out to the bars tonight. I stood there, fixing my hair and trying to make it lay how I like it, and how I know the girls like it. I tried to remember this morning, thinking of what Samantha asked me to do, but the longer I tried to think about it, the less I cared to figure it out and I shrugged it off, deciding to completely wipe her from my mind.

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The more I looked at myself in the mirror, the more I resented myself. My brown hair is one thing that I hated the most and I had even broken a few mirrors in the house when looking into them, my mind forcing me to think of my father and sometimes getting so upset that I lash out and punch the mirror. The only thing that I liked about myself was my eyes, I was thankful to have received the best part about my mother’s many perfect features. She had always been so beautiful, even as she aged, she still had youth in her looks and I never got tired of looking at her. It amazes me to think back to when I was as a child; the mere sight of my father enraged me, but whenever I looked at my mother, it was always a complete mood change and she made me happy again. 

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I don’t have any pictures of my mother, no pictures of the family at all were salvaged from the fire. The only thing that we kept was all of my mother’s favorite paintings that were stored in the garage; I brought a few to my frat house to decorate with, but I leave my favorites and the rest of them at my house back at home in the city. It pained me to look at them, but it also made me tranquil at times; my mother always painted such beautiful, colorful things that anyone could stare at for hours without getting bored. She could project such powerful emotions in her paintings, all of them different and unique in their own way. I noticed that Sabastian had finally gotten around to framing them for me like I had asked, which made me smirk slightly since they looked even better now.

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My mind went blank as I starred at her paintings, but my phone started to ring and I sighed, wondering if it was Samantha calling to yell at me for something stupid, but I was surprised to see that Hitomi was calling me. I let it ring a few times while trying to think of why she would be calling me. I sighed and my insides twisted a little, knowing now what she was calling for and I answered it after about six rings. “Yeah?” I answered.

“Wow, nice greeting, asshole..” She began and I rolled my eyes.

“Wha’d you call for?” I asked.

“Wow, no ‘hey, how are you, haven’t seen you in almost a year?” She asked in an irritated tone and I only grew less amused.

“Hitomi, come on, you do this every time you call this time of year..”

“Then why’d you ask why I called?”

I sighed and didn’t answer, soon hearing Hitomi sigh as well on her end before continuing.

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“It’s the anniversary of their deaths soon.. You know we always go to their grave together,” she finally answered and I stood there for a moment, thinking about what she just said and I hated visiting their graves with my sisters; I liked to go alone..

“Yeah.. I know. I don’t know if I’ll make it on the day, though.. I have finals coming up in two weeks, too..”

“You always have finals around this time and you always give me an excuse! I’m not stupid, Jason, your finals are over a few days before the anniversary. Just say you’ll be there, okay?” She pleaded and I sighed heavily. “Please, Jason? It would be really great to see you,” she continued and I hesitated for a few more long seconds.

“I’ll see what I can do,” I replied.

“GOD, you’re such an ass! ..Mom would be disappointed,” she added and hung up on me, my heart sinking into my chest and Hitomi always knew how to get under my skin and get me to do what she wanted..

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After collecting myself and getting rid of thoughts about my mother, I left my room and came out to Dean playing pool by himself in the living room, “Aye! Come on now, join me,” he said in his twang. I wanted to go out, but then again I didn’t feel like it anymore after my phone call with Hitomi. 

“Yeah, why not,” I replied with a grin.

“Yeah, that’s the spirit!” He replied happily and started a new game for us.

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“You ready for finals?” Dean asked and I chuckled.

“Hah! Hardly. I’ll just get Auturo to give me the answers before I take my final, we have a lot of the same classes,” I replied and he laughed.

“Yeah, that was kinda my plan too,” he teased and gave me a wink. “So who was that sweet lil’ number that left your room this mornin’? Samantha still?” He asked. I could tell he was thinking dirty thoughts about her, seeing as she stormed out of my room half naked this morning and everyone probably got a good look. I didn’t care in the slightest though that he was thinking about her like that, though, I didn’t care about her.

“Yeah, Sam still.. Getting to her sister is harder than I thought. She never invites me over so I can maybe chat with her a little, and we don’t have any classes together so it’s hard to get any face time,” I replied and he chuckled.

“Bettie’s goin’ to be hard to get regardless.. She’s only had a few boyfriends, you could count how many she’s had using one hand,” he answered and I cocked my brow.

“The chase is what makes it all worth it, my friend,” I added and we laughed together.

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“I’ll still never understand how you can keep track of all them girls. At least ten a day try to get your attention and you’re able to putt everythin’ off, makin’ it look so easy all the damn time,” Dean complained a little and I snickered.

“Not all of us can be gifted when it comes to the art of romancing,” I replied matter of factly, Dean’s face getting slightly sour but he couldn’t help but shrug, agreeing with me slightly. “You can have Sam when I’m done with her if you want,” I offered and he looked intrigued, but soon shrugged that off, too.

“Nah, I don’t want your sloppy seconds, man. Maybe I’ll just go for the untainted-by-Jason Bettie,” he threatened with a grin and I grew angered instantly.

“Back off! I got dibs, I’ve been working on this forever it seems,” I reply with a warning tone.

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“Hey, now, I was just messin’, you know I wouldn’t butt in,” Dean paused, “Not unless she came on to me first,” he continued and I let out a genuine laugh.

“Yeah! Like she would ever do that..” I teased back and Dean grew irritated.

“‘The hell’s that supposed to mean?” He asked with a short tone and I chuckled.

“Calm doowwnn, I’m just messin’,” I repeated his words back to him and he kept his frown, moving on then to a more sensitive subject.

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“Well.. There’s always one of them three sisters a’yers, I for one have noticed the way that lovely little Julia looks at me.. And Anya? Phew!” He teased and my blood began to boil, giving him a death stare before I took my shot.

Dean then held his hand up and acted as if it was Julia, “Oh, Dean, you’re so cute! I wanna do all the things in the world to you!” He continued in a girly voice, then began making kissing noises as he kissed the ‘mouth’ he made with his hand. 

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“Dude.. Shut the fuck up before I beat the living shit out of you,” I threatened, only needing to do it once and Dean soon got the picture, securing his hands around his pool stick again and deciding that it was best not to continue on to how he would mimic himself and Anya together next.. He just saved himself a world of hurt; had he mentioned Hitomi as well, knowing that she was married, I would’ve really lost it.

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“So.. What r’ya gunna do after your finals?” Dean changed the subject, though it was just another thing I didn’t want to talk about. 

“Going back home for a little bit probably.. Maybe for the summer, I’m not sure yet,” I replied, taking my shot and missing my chance to make the orange ball in. I sighed heavily after I missed; I was usually really good at this, but my mind was a little distracted at the moment as I dreaded the thought of going home.

“You don’t seem all that excited. How long has it been since you’ve seen your sisters, anyhow?” He wondered and I pondered for a moment. 

“I don’t know.. I haven’t seen Anya since I joined college.. Haven’t seen Julia in two years, and I saw Hitomi last year. A lot has changed, with me and all of them too.”

“Why do ya go home every summer? Why don’t you just chill here since you make it seem like you dread goin’ there every time,” Dean suggested.

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I sighed, waiting for Dean to take his turn, “It’s.. Kind of a tradition for us all to visit my parent’s graves on the anniversary of the accident. I usually try to avoid them and visit my parents alone, though,” I reluctantly replied, knowing he would only pry more if I avoided the question.

“Oh, I’m sorry, man.. Must be rough,” Dean said with an uneasy tone and I shrugged, acting like I didn’t care about going there.

“Eh, it’s whatever.. Only gotta do it once a year, so it’s not that big of a deal,” I replied with little care and he shrugged, believing my lie and my mind began to wander. I miss my mother so much.. The pain I feel whenever I thought about her is hard to endure, especially now knowing she was murdered by my father. God, I hope she didn’t feel anything, I hoped and preyed that she was fast asleep, unable to comprehend even for a second what was happening to her as she was engulfed in the flames.. I manage to last until our game is over to hold my composure and as soon as Dean wins, I excuse myself to my room where I bury my face in my pillows to help hide my pathetic, gentle sobs as thoughts of my beautiful mother refuse to leave my mind for the rest of the night.

Generation 1, Chapter 18, Finale

Attention: Ehhh, sorry for the sudden change in the writing. I think I’m going to go to first person now. I don’t know why I start off stories in third, I always end up regretting it.. I thought this last chapter would be better in first, too. Plus, a little heads up; this chapter might be, well, depressing. Read on only if you want to, and it’s probably the longest chapter I’ve written so far.

Also, a little more than half way into getting the screenshots, Julia aged up *rolls eyes*, so she’ll becomes a teen in this chapter, though I don’t really advertise it in the story. Hitomi aged up, too, she’s now a YA but she still looks the same, only taller. Thanks for reading!

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Sadie was in the kitchen, venturing around and trying to figure out what to make me for breakfast. The kids had all gone to school before I came downstairs, unable to face them.. Thoughts that I never could imagine would cross my mind; I had been thinking for an entire week ever since Sadie had confessed to me about taking Jason to a psychiatrist and I was not pleased with what she told me. I was the farthest from pleased. It made me angry. I hated that she had gone behind my back, but as I thought about it more, she was just trying to keep me from thinking about losing my best friend; the best friend that I killed with little to no mercy. What was worse is that ever since I had told Sadie that I would ‘deal with it,’ I still was unable to think of anything so far that I thought would make Jason more accepting at the thought of me. I love him.. I think I do.. As much as a father could love his own son, but I was beginning to resent him simply because he wouldn’t accept me; he was terrified of me and I knew Jason didn’t know why, but I could see it in his eyes every time I looked at him. Oh, how I hated to look at him.

“I fed the kids before they went to school, do you want me to make you anything? Are you hungry?’ Sadie asked me while in the kitchen, hearing her clanging around dishes and pans trying to put something together.

“No, I’m alright,” I replied, returning my attention to the television that I wasn’t even really paying any attention to.

“Alright, I’ll just make something for me. Let me know when you get hungry though, okay?” She asked with a motherly tone and I didn’t reply.

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Sadie’s talking to me as I space out, not listening to her and also not listening or watching the television. My eyelids grow heavy and I soon see darkness, my thoughts consuming me and I began to cringe at what was brought to my mind. My family, my babies, my wife; things I never thought I would have and want so much, yet I couldn’t help in thinking that I would be better off without them, and them without me. I was young and stupid, I didn’t know what had come over me and I changed my entire life in the blink of an eye the moment Sadie came to my door, three months pregnant with Hitomi. I hadn’t realized it then, and not really now, even. I tell her I love her, yet for some reason I feel as if someone like me isn’t capable of doing that, making me wonder if how I feel about her is even love at all, but more of a protective nature for the mother of my children. I’m possessive; Jason knows it, too, always questioning me and almost competing with me for Sadie’s attention. Even though he’s my own child, I feel as if he’s stepping too much into my territory, and he knows it; and enjoys it. 

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I hadn’t even noticed Sadie sit next to me after her meal, I must’ve been sitting there with my eyes shut for a while; how long had she been talking with no response from me? 

“What?” I asked, hoping she would repeat whatever she had just said to me and I watched her sigh.

“Marrick? Are you alright? I asked you like, 4 times already?” Sadie said with slight disappointment but I didn’t feel the normal guilt I usually would at the sign of her feeling sad.

“Sorry, I was just.. Thinking,” I reply and she shrugs it off, repeating whatever she had asked me for the fifth time.

“What do you want to get Hitomi for her graduation present? She’s done amazing her entire school career, she’s so smart and she really worked hard. I think we should get her something really special,” Sadie continued and I eventually nodded.

“Sure, I’ll think of something,” I answered, realizing that not only had I become more possessive, but I was a control freak and Jason always liked to throw that in my face, as well.

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Sadie was pleased with my answer as she looked to me and smiled, once again just like numerous times before, letting me handle it. She knew not to fight me, we had been married for over 17 years and I had no idea why I treated her like she was a pet instead of a person; my wife. But, I couldn’t help but feel like she acted like one most of the time.

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“I love you,” I hear her say just above a whisper and I look to her, seeing and believing the look in her eyes and I smirked. I had to admit, for as long as this relationship has lasted, I couldn’t have been more pleased with who I decided to let into my fucked up life. Though, at the same time, I regretted being with someone like her; she was too good for me and she deserved better, much better. I didn’t reply, swinging my right hand over her torso and grasping her hip, bringing her into a kiss that I was sure she wasn’t able to handle. She moaned gently against my lips and I realized it had been a while since we actually had any alone time without needing to do chores or errands when not tending to the kids. 

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Thoughts began to flow through my head once more, ones that made me regret all of this. How could I have been so stupid? I kept having more children, hoping for girls so I would never pass on the Dubois’ cursed trait, but I never realized that any son that Hitomi, Anya and Julia may have in the future could very well pass it on to them, skipping a generation.. Stupid, stupid, stupid! ..Now, with three girls who had the ability to cause the gene to continue, and also getting so deep in this to actually having a son myself.. What have I done? I wanted no children, none, for this very reason, to protect anyone who would get involved with this family and I hated that I only made more and more problems for myself without even realizing it. I had to do something about this.. Hitomi was going off to college soon and same with Anya, not to mention Julia was close to being in high school and I didn’t want to risk one of them getting into anything serious with someone or even for them to have any accidents; I couldn’t handle it, I’d turn over in my grave if I knew this family was going to continue on passed me or my own children..

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The day went on and I only worried more, thinking harder now than before as Sadie made dinner and I sat at the table with my children, looking to each of their faces and hating knowing that they remind me every day on how far I really had gone into all of this. I hated it. This isn’t what I wanted at all and now, look where I am. The conversation’s the kids had never caught my attention or made me feel like I needed to give feedback, their voices foggy as I continued to resent them the longer I sat there.

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Julia’s voice was flowing through my ears, though my eyes remained on Jason as I stared at him, surprisingly without him noticing. How was I going to do this? How was I going to set everything right? My eyes soon went back to Sadie, still preparing the food and watching her at the stove, watching as the burner caught fire after a few clicks. The flames popped up, lighting the burner and she began heating the pan she was using to prepare the food and it was as if I was mesmerized by the blue and orange flames.

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“Dad, what do you think?” Julia asked me and I looked to her briefly

“What?” I ask her to repeat it.

“Daaaad! You weren’t even listening,” she whines gently and I smirk with slight guilt.

“Sorry, baby girl. I’m listening now,” I assure her and she smiles but I contiune then to look at Sadie as Julia repeats what she asked me and I still don’t hear it.

“Jeez, Dad, at least pretend you care,”  Hitomi added after Julia’s second attempt to get my opinion on something, snapping out of my trance once again and Anya took the initiative to give her little sister the attention she wanted.

I think it’s awesome you wanna have a big sleepover with your friends, it would be a lot of fun. Hitomi and I can give you girl’s make overs, paint our nails.. It’ll be awesome,” Anya said with a smile and I soon nodded in agreement, Julia finally noticing that I was finally paying attention now and she smiled with joy at my approval. 

“Anything you want,” I added and she only smiled more, giggling with joy.

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Sadie finishes preparing the meal and brings plates for everyone, giving everyone a share of the meal, feeding me first, the children, then feeds herself last. I watch as Sadie doesn’t sit at the table right away, going over to her preparation area and cleaning it up so she didn’t have to do it later. “Sadie, come sit,” I told her and she looked over her shoulder at me with an apologetic smirk.

“I know, I know, but I don’t want anything to stay out too long, it’s so much easier to clean when you get all of the fresh crud off first,” she replied, continuing to rinse and scrub the dishes in the sink and I wasn’t pleased that she wasn’t joining us. For all I knew, and them, this could be our last meal together, should I decide to go through with anything tonight.

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It isn’t until everyone else is finished with their meal when Sadie finally joins us all at the table and there’s guilt on her face when she looks to me, taking in my unwelcoming stare and I feel as if I scolded her without even saying or doing anything. She doesn’t look at me for the rest of the time that she eats.

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“Hey, do you mind if I go to my friends house tonight? I promise to be back before 11:00pm,” Hitomi grabs my attention. Just by her tone of voice and use of words, I knew she was going to try and sneak over to John’s house and that was the last thing I wanted her to do. She noticed the disapproval in my expression and soon fidgeted within her seat, “Pleeeaaassee?”

“What are you going to be doing? You seem rather excited to go there,” I point out her not-so-subtle way of hiding the truth of where she really was going and she sighed lightly.

“We’re just.. Going to be studying, really.. I have finals in two weeks and I want to be ready,” she continued to lie and it only made me more dissappointed in her; I raised her better than that. But, before I could contest to it, someone else did.

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“Yeah, make out finals,” Jason mutters under his breath before following Anya and Julia out of the kitchen and Hitomi’s face turns red.

“Shut up, you little shit!” Hitomi called back and I gave her another displeased expression, not liking her language at the table. 

“Hitomi..” I scolded softly and she sighed.

“Fine, whatever, I’ll just stay at home I guess.. Study here,” Hitomi caved in, realizing her lie wasn’t working out in her favor and giving it up.

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We all sat within the living room, watching television together and I listened to their small conversations while watching the show, all of them giving their own little piece of feedback about the program and I could care less about any of it. As I watched my family enjoy themselves and each other’s presence, I couldn’t help but feel left out; it didn’t bother me, I wanted to be alone anyhow, and it felt like I was. 

“Alright, it’s 10:00pm, go and get ready for bed. You’ve all got school tomorrow,” Sadie said in a loving tone and the kids all groaned, but fulfilled her request and Sadie shut the television off.

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Sadie and I always said goodnight to the kids before they went to bed, Anya coming up to us first and I welcomed her into my arms, “How about you and mom go clothes shopping soon? You’ll need new things when you go off to college, too. Maybe a laptop, as well,” I said with a smile and Anya’s face lit up, giving me the reaction that I’d hoped for.

“Eeeee! Yay! Awesome, thank you! Can we go this weekend?” She asked excitedly and I looked to Sadie who smiled and nodded.

“Yup, let’s go this weekend,” Sadie confirmed and Anya let out another excited.. Noise, squee, or however you want to describe it. We all exchanged ‘i love you’s’ and she raced upstairs, happy as could be.

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Julia walked up to us and she had a shy smile; I knew she wanted something, too. “Tell you what, how about when your mom and Anya are out shopping, we can go fishing. My little angler hasn’t been to the lake in a while,” I offered and she lit up instantly.

“Yeah, yeah! You need to teach me how to bait the worm properly again, mine always gets nibbled at and eaten!” She complained and I nodded.

“I’ll teach you a lot of things, anything you want,” I continued and she only grew more excited, hugging Sadie and I and exchanging ‘i love you’s’ again. 

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Hitomi walked up next and she already had a grin on her face, expecting the same treatment that we had given Anya and Julia and it was Hitomi that I would probably hurt the most. “I’m off to college reeeeeaaally soon.. Got amazing grades my entire school careeeeeeeerr,” Hitomi eggs on, hoping her treat would be something deserved rather than just flat out given; wanting to one up her siblings, I suppose.

“Car?” I reply simply and her smile fades instantly, not believing what I said and she stands there in shock.

“You’re j-joking, right!?” She asked hurriedly and I smirked, shaking my head ‘no’ and her jaw dropped.

“What? You’re right. You worked hard, you deserve it, plus you need to get around when you’re at college, don’t you?” I asked and her smile went from ear to ear.

“Oh, my god! Thankyouthankyouthankyou!” She repeated and threw her arms around both of us, hugging us tightly and we exchanged more ‘i love you’s’.

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“What do you want, sweetheart? I don’t want you to be left out,” Sadie cooed sweetly and Jason smirked, shrugging his shoulders.

“Anything you want,” I added and he didn’t bother to look at me.

“I don’t care, I don’t really need anything,” he replied and Sadie and I sighed, looking to one another and trying to think of something for him. “Well..” Jason began again, catching our attention and eager to hear his request. “C-Can I get a puppy? I mean.. It might help a little.. With what I, you know.. See?” He asked, looking to Sadie as if only asking her and she smiles, looking to me and waiting for my approval. 

Sadie watches as I nod and she smiles wider, looking to Jason, “Sure, we can do that. I wouldn’t mind a dog, either,” Sadie agreed and Jason smiled.

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I knelt down and thought I would try something, holding out my arms and my expression was weak, trying for the last time for my son to give me a chance to show him that I care about him, even if he doesn’t think so. Well, maybe not care, but his constant resentment and cold shoulders were getting on my last nerve. “Just one, that’s all I ask, I won’t ever ask you for another one,” I tell him and he hesitates. “Why do you do this? Why do you shut me out, hate me?” I asked, wanting to know exactly what he thought of me. 

“Why are you doing this?” He asks in return and I’m not sure what he’s referring to.

“What?”

This.. This being nice and giving us things. It’s like your apologizing for something you did or are going to do, or leaving or something..” Wow, we’re too alike and he knows better than I thought to the point that it almost makes me sick. Jason answered me angrily but I knew then that he cared for me, he just never chose to show it. He was worried about me leaving, or finding myself in trouble. I was slightly warmed by this and I no longer needed the hug; this was just fine.

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I rose back to my feet and stood straight, looking down to him and his expression was eager to hear my answer, “I’m not going anywhere, bud. And I didn’t do anything. I guess my concern for your guys’ well-being might come off as strict sometimes, but it’s because I care,” wow, I was a good liar, “I’ll try to back off more on it, but you have to stop walking around like you can’t stand me or no puppy,” I made a deal with him and his expression grew irritated, not liking that I was withholding the puppy until he agreed to treat me better.

“Fine..” Jason agreed and I smirked, agreeing to the deal.

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Jason looked to me, his gaze lasting much longer than his normal ones and he was actually able to look at me, “Do.. You think I could go with you and Julia.. Fishing?” Jason asked and I smiled, nodding and Sadie was overjoyed with the huge turn around that Jason had directed himself towards.

“Of course, bud. Whatever you want. Julia and I usually wake up around 4:00am to get there before the sun comes up, think you can handle it?” I asked, knowing how much he loved his sleep on the weekends, but he soon nodded and smirked.

“Yeah, I can do that,” he replied somewhat confidently and Sadie and I tell him we love him, but he goes passed us with a smile instead and goes upstairs to his room.

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Sadie and I stay up for a little bit longer after the kids go to sleep, but around 11:30pm we call it a night and head upstairs. We didn’t go to bed right away, instead we tired ourselves out passionately before falling asleep, holding her against me and yet again, falling victim to those lingering, evil thoughts as I drifted off to sleep..

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1:36 AM

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I’m tired. I look at the clock on the wall and it reads around 1:40 in the morning. The television is still on from earlier before we had gone to bed, it’s so irritating but I don’t turn it off. My body is groggy, but able to move itself as I rise from the bed in a desolate manner. I walk to the dresser and put on pajama pants and throw on a shirt. I’m tired.. So tired of this. 

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